Before continuing to read this chapter. I'd like to say that there is a link to an illustration of the scene at the end of this chapter. I uploaded it in Google drive and I'm not sure but it seems that you'll need a google account of your own if you want to view it.
So, if you want to view the illustration immediately after reading, then I suggest you log in to your account now, so you just need to paste the link later. Or, if you don't really care about being spoiled, then you can peek at it now. Just go to the end of the chapter.
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Chapter 07 – When the Petals Start to Fall
Sakura lay on her bed with her body covered with a warm blanket up to her neck.
She was staring at the ceiling of her room and except for her steady breathing and her eye blinking occasionally, she didn't move much. With her back on the bed, she kept her eyes open.
A few minutes later, the alarm for 6 AM on her phone rang.
She reached for the device beside her and turned it off the alarm. She shifted her vision to the right, there was the window there before the table. Outside was bright, bringing illumination into the room. It was morning already, yet she had barely got any sleep.
The girl stayed on her bed and closed her eyes. Dozens of minutes passed before she opened her eyes again. She got up, sat on her bed, and after taking deep breathes, she sluggishly stood up.
In front of the mirror, she could see a darkened area of skin below her eyes. Sighing, she removed her pajama and started to change clothes.
Last night, Sakura waited in the clearing for Henkou but the boy didn't come. He didn't reply to her messages and there was no seen indicator in her messages as well, suggesting that he couldn't have read them yet.
[Where did you go?] she asked. But as expected, no one was there to answer her question.
As she kept on thinking about the possibilities of what happened to Henkou or where could he have possibly gone. Did he forget about their agreement? Did he play a trick on her? Was all he said all an act? These thoughts were denied by Sakura. Henkou must have got a good reason why he could not come. He seemed to be someone who would not lie like that and can be trusted. She realize that she barely knew him but even so, Henkou must be here somewhere.
What happened last night could no longer be changed and even though most of the responsibility still fell on her, she could not help but blame Henkou a little. Sakura was the one who suggested to Sho to burn her, and she could not take back what she said now, especially so after seeing how far in despair he had fallen.
Even now, she was still hoping that she could rely on Henkou.
Her hands stopped running the comb in her hair, she had finished changing as well. This morning again, she would go on her routine. She went out of her house, greeting her mother working in the kitchen already on the way. Their parents know that she always visits the cherry tree every morning but her night strolls, meeting with Sho, and of course, about her atonement by being burned were all things she did not tell them.
This morning had a lesser mist than yesterday; Sakura noted as she walked to her destination. Although she was feeling down, coming here would be always something that she would not skip. But then, her feet stopped when she could see from it afar. Then suddenly, she started to trot over until she was in front of the cherry tree, looking upward all the while.
The clear blue sky shone on the flowers, vividly showing their pale pink colors as some of them had started to fall without the wind to carry them away. Like how snow fall naturally, the petals kept dropping to the ground.
The cherry tree had started its transition and in a few or several days, all the pink flowers would become green leaves. Sakura always felt sad about this fact. However, in all cases where she witnesses the petals falling, all her thoughts would be focused on the tree, on the petals, and in the present time.
The moment when the cherry tree sheds its petals to change, is the peak of its beauty.
A strong wind passed by, plucked numbers of petals, and sent scattering into the air. Sakura's eyes followed after them until they were out of her vision or until they had fallen into the water of the rice paddies. This scene was relaxing.
Now that she thought about it, a few days after she had burned the house, she started to come here. Being in the presence of this single beautiful tree was relaxing and it comforted her. It helped her greatly four years ago to get over the incident she caused.
[Ah… This tree feels like it is telling me to not worry too much.]
Sakura's lips made a slight smile. However, she could not just let things go anymore and pretend that nothing happened.
Her breathing was more than audible right now as she kept focused on the tree and even the slight sway of the branches. Turning her neck further, the cerulean sky was there, in the background of the foliage.
Not long after, she decided to sit under the shade of the tree, facing the creek below, and began to think about the series of events that happened in these few days. Her mind also wandered to the past, and she also recalled the incident, as well as many good things that happened to her in these four years.
Then Sakura heard footsteps coming to her. She turned to look and found out it was Sho.
She was slightly disappointed, and she didn't rise to her feet. She had considered the boy would come here too, and she had already prepared her heart and mind. He stopped walking when he arrived at her side. Sakura glanced at him. He was also watching the creek below.
"Morning," Sakura said.
"…Morning," Sho replied, glancing at her the same with his dead eyes.
The two just watched how the clear water in the creek flow down. It was shallow a stream, the deepest part in the middle would only reach her thighs, and where near the bank would only cover her toes. The rocks beneath were visible today as well. Few leaves and the petals occasionally fall in and were carried away by the stream.
There was a three-meter-deep area of it, but she would need to tread further down where it was far from any house in the town. It was secluded. Sakura knew of the fact since she had gone down there a few times as well, and she would bring her swimsuit sometimes to swim.
"What is the name of your little brother," silently, Sakura asked as she stared at the boy seriously.
This question had been on her mind since yesterday. She didn't have the time to do ask last night but she had to know the name of the person she killed.
Sho was visibly astonished.
"…Haruki," Sho paused. "That was his name."
"I see." She averted her gaze from him to the creek again. "Thank you for telling me. Sorry."
"No, I am not sure anymore when I last spoke his name. For that, I'm thankful to you."
Sakura didn't reply to that.
"Tonight, at 3 AM, let's meet again…in the usual place… You have prepared yourself, right?"
"Yes. I know."
"I see." Sho stayed silent beside her and just stood still. Even if she couldn't t see his face, she could tell that he still wanted to say something. She waited but it only took a few seconds. "I have one more reason coming here this time, you know Henkou, right?"
Sakura regained the focus of her mind.
"What about him?"
"Last night, he apparently saved a girl and captured the criminal. But in the process, he died."
Eh?
"The criminal stabbed him with a knife and the blood loss had killed him."
…Sakura suddenly turned to him and asked in a forceful voice. "Is that true!?"
"…Yes." The boy certainly looked telling that he didn't expect such a reaction from her. He brought out his phone, fiddled with it, and showed the screen. "It made to the headlines already."
It was about an article hailing as a hero for sacrificing himself to save a person. The boy who died was still unidentified, but they had a picture of his face and showed him to the public to identify him.
Sakura extended his finger and scrolled down the screen herself. Eventually, a picture of a person who was lying in a white bed showed. His eyes were closed, and he was smiling. It was undeniably Henkou.
Her eyes widened like saucers.
Below the picture, was a message the boy said in his dying breath, "I'm sorry I couldn't come with you. Good luck to both of you."
She pulled back her hand, covered her mouth with it, and looked down in shock.
"Seems like he wasn't lying when he first met him. Turns out he's a great guy… I'm on the way to the police station to inform them about his name. His first name is the only thing I know though."
Sho waited again but when Sakura didn't speak to him, he decided to leave. "…Alright, tonight then."
His leaving footsteps resounded louder than when he came until she could not hear them anymore.
[He…died?]
[Henkou died?]
It made sense now. He said he would come late last night but he was probably tailing the criminal or something already by that time. And when she kept waiting for him in the campfire, he was, already dead.
It made sense. And it's utter nonsense.
Sakura felt like the god from above was playing a joke on her life. As if he just landed a plot twist in his story and enjoyed how she suffered. A hope appeared, only to disappear when she needed it.
Henkou was kind. She could tell from the way he acted. However, she didn't have particular unique feelings for the boy aside from gratitude for extending his help to her. He tried to comfort her from her worries and offered encouragement. Sakura was genuinely moved by his sincerity and had put her trust in him, and he said that he would be there with her.
This news of his death brought sadness to her and despair.
In reality, Henkou wasn't able to come, nor he will be able to come. He was supposed to stop Sho from whatever he would do to bring harm to her. He was supposed to be someone he could rely on. But that was no more. She could not blame him. After all, he saved someone else's life.
But at this moment, all her hope had been crushed.
There was no one to help her now.
"Hah." Sakura exhaled.
Her parents? She didn't want them to know she had killed someone. What would they think about her if they knew that she was a murderer? She was scared of how they would treat her. Even if they would side with her, they would have to bear the cross of becoming a murderer's parents.
Then what would be about her friends? What would they think? Someone might help her, but Sakura knew reality as she had watched her friends all this time. No one would probably help her one-sidedly. And worst, they might even criticize her and send her to the police…
She could not bring her parents and friends into this. It was all her responsibility, so she had to be the one to take care of it.
Henkou as well encouraged her to make her own decision. Now that she thought about it, despite being and a stranger who found out about the incident by himself, he was kind. He was also weird for trusting her easily and involving himself when he would gain no merit from it.
But he was no more.
"Haaah." She inhaled deeply and released it.
At that very moment when her breathing and heartbeat began to begin to move erratically, she heard the rattling of the branches above and pink petals dropping to the ground past her vision.
Sakura looked up.
[Right.]
Staring at the cherry tree donned with countless flowers, she started to calm down.
"You are still here for me…" Sakura stood up and touched the trunk of the cherry tree. "I guess it's just you and me again."
All these years, when she burned the house, when she couldn't confess, when any problem came to her, the cherry tree had been always with her. Even now that she could not rely on anyone, she could rely on that tree. It listened to her, witnessed every important event and grave problem of her life, and had always supported her. This tree had always stood alone by herself, yet it still goes on beautifully. Sakura always was captivated by it.
The tree was a common kind of cherry tree called Somei Yoshino, and it has pretty bright pink petals, that would fall gracefully after its full bloom. But that was not the main reason it was so important to her. The rice paddies and the creek below—it was a tree that stood in between them.
Like to the meaning of her name, Kawada Sakura.
She connected herself to the tree, thinking that it symbolizes her. It was not inappropriate to say that the girl also thought that the tree was herself.
All alone, she smiled.
Sakura stayed there for another hour, before going home.
~ . ~ . ~ . . . ~ . ~ . ~
Sakura stayed all day inside their house, in fact, she almost didn't leave her room except when it required her. She had also confirmed from her father that someone had definitely died last night, and it was Henkou.
What she did during the day was only to space out staring outside the window and sleep. She spent most of the time sleeping and only woke up again when her mother called her name for dinner. All her movements were sluggish.
It was late night already and in a few more hours, she was to be burned. But strangely, the realization hadn't completely set in. It felt like she was dreaming, and this was not the reality despite being aware that it was all too real. That was why she did not do anything in particular like disposing of some of her personal belongings even though she was about to die.
Inside her dark room, she was staring at the ceiling, much like what she had done this morning. She spent her time like that. She closed her eyes several times as well, but she did not sleep.
Time passed and the agreed time would be soon. Sakura was aware of it, so she got up from her bed and looked to the right. She could make out the table and she knew that placed atop it was a set of clothes she had prepared beforehand.
She walked near the door, turned on the lights, and started to change her clothes. She wore a maroon-shaded, long-sleeved jacket that she put on over her blazer. Her skirt reached to her knees along with white socks and black shoes.
She was now ready. The girl opened her window, looked upward to see the bright moon, which was awfully resemblant to the moon that shone upon her four years ago. She closed the window, turned off the lights, and went out of her room. She carefully went down the stairs so that she would not wake anyone. Before she could step outside, the girl went back into the kitchen.
She knew what she was looking for and she found it so easily. With some hesitation and doubt to herself, she took it. Her reason was "just in case." But even wasn't sure what case would that be. She stopped thinking about it and headed out.
Sho said that they would meet again in the usual place, the clearing at 2 AM and she still had time to spare. Instead of taking the direct pathway to the residential district, she chose to walk to the path that circumvented the numerous rice paddies. Before heading to her doom, she would for the last time, want to see the tree that she so dearly cherished.
Sakura didn't have any trouble walking without lights as the ground was well illuminated. She looked up to the sky, it was black yet not completely with the moon shining.
"I wanna be a moon," she sang, then hummed the rest of the song. "Hmm-mhmm."
That was why she would remain beautiful until the end and fall just the same.
The girl kept her chin up, without looking around, she could tell that she was just one turn away from the cherry tree now. Then she noticed something not right. The dark sky that was dimly illuminated was now as if glowing with weak orangish light.
Her feet stopped, her eyes widened, and her mouth opened in shock when she saw the cause of it.
—The cherry tree was burning.
The tree that was had supported her all these years, the one that she considered as her other half, was now being consumed by the raging flames.
Sakura stared in horror; no sound would come out from her throat.
"Sakura-san."
Then someone called her name. There was a person several meters away from the tree who was looking at her. It was Sho.
The next moment, his mouth curved up and showed a mocking grin.
—Kawada Sakura dashed.
She couldn't think straight anymore. Her chest was filled with rage, and it fueled her feet to kick the ground. She bellowed as she ran.
"AaaaAAAHHHHhhh!!!!"
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