SAM'S POV
"Samantha! Mabuti naman pumunta ka rito! Akala ko talaga hindi mo na'ko pupuntahan rito..Masyado mo'kong pinag-alala bata ka!"
I just stayed motionless as I was hugged by my aunt pagkababa ko palang ng sasakyan ko. She quickly ran to me and welcomed me in a tight hug.
Though I wanted to hug her back but my disappointment on her was just too strong kaya pinili ko nalang na pigilan ang sarili ko. Dahil alam ko ring kilala niya kung sino ang tunay kong mga magulang. The reason why it became more painful for me dahil siya na mismo na kadugo ni dad was hiding something from me.
"Ano, napagod ka ba sa byahe? Gusto mo bang magpahinga muna sandali ? O baka naman nagugutom ka na? Sabihin mo lang sa'kin.." sunud-sunod na tanong nito pagkabitaw nito sa'kin habang nakangiting nakatingin sa'kin while still holding my hands.
Kahit nakangiti ito, I can detect sadness in her eyes right now. And just taking a close look at her, mukhang tumanda ito ng ilang taon dahil sa malalaking eyebags nito ngayon. Looking so stressed out. Probably with worry that I had caused her these past few days with me being away.
"Magbibihis lang ako sandali saka pupunta na'ko agad sa puntod nila dad, auntie.. I just came here for that anyway." Matabang na sagot ko rito, not wanted stay long in this place.
A disappointment instantly crept up in her eyes but she quickly covered it up with a smile though her eyes was giving her away.
"Alright. Hihintayin nalang kita rito sa labas and when you're done, aalis na agad tayo."
I just stiffly nodded at her and then without any words, I dashed off to her house and to my room. May mga gamit naman akong naiwan rito kaya 'yon na ang ginamit ko. And before heading out, I quickly put my waistlength hair in a ponytail saka naghilamos ma and brushed my teeth in a dash to freshen up myself kahit na medyo masakit pa ang ulo ko hanggang ngayon.
Hangover.. yan ang napala ko sa paglalasing kagabi. And add to the fact na ilang oras din ang binyahe ko papunta rito. Once I was done, agad na'kong bumaba ng hagdan.
Kabababa ko palang ng hagdan and I was just about to head outside but I frowned when my phone kept vibrating in my pocket again.
Kanina ko pa ito napapansin while I was still on my way here.
Taking it out, I groaned when it was Mr. Del Fuero again.
Goodness. Not now, bastard. I already have an idea why he kept calling on me again. Of course, to trace me and eventually find me at saka ikukulong na naman ako nito.
'Gusto mo rin ba 'ko?'
When I feel like I heard him asked me that again, I quickly shrugged the thoughts of him from my mind and declined that call. Ibinulsa ko na uli iyon before I ran outside.
Ayokong isipin ang taong 'yon. He's dangerous for me now.
Aunt Rose gave me a small smile pagkakita nito sa'kin habang nakatayo sa gilid ng abuhing sasakyan nito.
"Let's go now?"
Again, I just stiffly nodded at her way saka sumakay na uli sa sasakyan ko.
For a moment, she just stayed rooted on her feet habang maigi lang itong nakatingin sa'kin.. Not even moving one bit.
I know she was confused right now with my cold treatment towards her pero ayoko lang magpanggap na okay lang ako because I am not. I am definitely not hangga't hindi ito magsasalita sa anumang nalalaman nito.
Letting out an exasperated sigh, dinungaw ko na ito sa may bintana,
"Sasakay ka ba, auntie?"
I think that pulled her out of her senses dahil napakurap-kurap agad ito when I asked her that.
"No, Samantha.. May mga naihanda na'kong pagkain dito sa loob ng sasakyan ko so I'll just take my own car this time." She answered with a forced smile saka pumasok na sa loob ng sasakyan nito.
Pagkapasok nito, I quickly started my engine saka nauna ng umalis mula ron.. She started her own engine as well and in just a few seconds, I can see her car at the rearview mirror following my lead.
Today's my parents' death anniversary and before this day would even end, I'll make sure na makukuha ko ang impormasyong kailangan ko mula sa kanya.
It only took us a few minutes to get to the cemetery kung nasaan ang puntod ng mga magulang ko. The cemetery was located on top of a slightly elevated area kaya naman inaasahan kong mahangin sa lugar na'yon. The place was well-cared by the caretakers in this cemetery kaya naman masyadong malinis ang lugar na'yon. Grasses were well-trimmed and you can't even spot any garbages being littered around.
Hindi na masyadong mainit ngayon as the sun was hiding behind those bundle of clouds above na nagsisimula namang umitim ngayon, an indication that it'll rain later.
I quickly parked my car sa tapat mismo ng entrance way ng cemetery and then got out from there.
'SHEPHERD MEMORIAL CEMETERY' was displayed right above the entrance.
I noticed her car was being parked behind my own kaya naman nilapitan ko na agad ito, wanted to help her out taking those foods, flowers and candles na ilalagay sa puntod mamaya.
When she had opened her trunk at the back, tahimik ko ng dinampot ang iba doon and then silently headed inside the cemetery at papunta sa puntod nila dad. Tahimik lang rin nitong dinampot ang iba pang nandoon and then she followed me on my heels.
I know it was cruel of me to treat her like this pero talagang wala akong ibang gustong sabihin dito kundi ang tanungin ito sa mga nalalaman nito.
'In loving memories of Nickandro Protacio Romero & Susan Javier Romero'
I heaved in a deep breath when I saw those words on their gravestone.
Those words were perfectly printed on it in scripted form. Too perfect.. Contrary to my life. My messy life.
It had been years now na hindi ko nakikita ang puntod nila rito. I was just too affected with them being gone that way para pumunta man lang rito at alalahanin kung anong mga nawala sa'kin at anong rason kung bakit pa'ko nabubuhay hanggang ngayon.
And now that I'm close to finding that man now, I think it was just right for me to pay them a visit.
Inilatag ko na ang mga dala-dala ko sa may damuhan and then blew out a deep sigh.
I felt aunt came to my side saka ibinaba naman nito ang mga dala-dala nito.
She lit the candle and then just stood there with me. We just silently stood there without saying any words habang nakatitig sa mga bulaklak na nandoon.
Nanatili lang akong ganun habang tiim ang mga bagang though I'm dying to ask her now.
Marami na'kong masasakit na napagdaan but why is it so hard for me now na tanungin ito tungkol sa tunay kong pagkatao?
But after awhile of her silence, I heard her let out a sigh beside me.
"Samantha.." I didn't turned to her way nang sambitin nya ang pangalan ko becauee if I will, tingin ko hindi ko mapipigilan ang sarili kong sigawan ito and force her to tell me what I want to know from her.
"I heard you've been to Mindanao with that Cameron del Fuero again, Samantha.. Ano palang ipinunta niyo doon?"
That made me frowned when she asked that.
"How did you know na galing kami dun?" Takang tanong ko rito with creased brows. Wondering why she knew that dahil hindi ko naman ito sinabi sa kanya.
Mapakla lang itong ngumiti sa'kin before she answered.
"I have my ways, Samantha.. "
"So does that mean alam mo na rin kung ano ang nalaman ko sa lugar na'yon, ganun ba auntie?" Diretsang tanong ko sa kanya, desidido ng komprontahin ito as I turned to face her now.
"Anong nalaman mo?"
I scoffed and shook my head at her as she sounded like she still had no idea about it kahit na halata namang inaasahan na nya iyon dahil nakatingin lang ito sa malayo, not even looking at me.
"Ang dapat kong malaman tungkol sa tunay kong pagkatao, auntie. That was what I discovered from there imbes na kung sino ang taong pumatay kina dad."
Agad na napatingin ito sa'kin with her eyes slightly widened in surprise.
Oh as if nabigla pa ito ngayon. Seeing her acting like this, di ko mapigilang mapakuyom na lamang ng kamay as the gritting of my teeth tightened, stopping myself to crumble into tears.
"Don't pretend like you hadn't expected this to happen, Auntie. Malalaman at malalaman ko rin naman sa huli na hindi ako tunay na anak nila dad and I am just some daughter ng kamag-anak niya na pinaampon lang sa kanya." I paused and bit the inside of my cheeks para pigilang maluha na naman as hurt crept inside me again.
Habang ito, nanatili lang itong nakatitig sa'kin without even blinking her eyes. I quickly looked away from her when tears began to glint in her eyes. Causing my eyes to heat up in tears as well.
I swallowed hard saka nagpatuloy while blankly staring at nowhere.
"Isa naman 'yon sa mga dahilan kung bakit ayaw mong ipagpatuloy ko ang kasong 'to di ba? Because of this. Dahil alam mong masasaktan ako kapag nalaman ko ang totoo na ang mga taong ipinaglalaban ko at pilit na hinahanapan ng hustisya ang pagkamatay nila were not actually my real parents at----"
"S-Samantha--"
I quickly pushed her hand away when she tried to hold my hand, probably to stop me saying all that.
Oh as if she can stop me now.
"No. Don't stop me dahil kung noon palang sinabi mo na sana ang totoo, ang lahat ng nalalaman mo, edi sana hindi ganito kasakit ito para sa'kin and I shouldn't have to hear it accidentally from the other people. Sa'yo ko dapat nalaman 'yon at hindi sa ibang tao!"
This time, a single tear had escaped from my eyes which I quickly wiped off with my hand bit the inside of my cheeks hard. So hard that I could even taste my own blood now in my mouth.
Lalo na noong marinig ko ng nagsimula ng humagulgol ito sa tabi ko, making it so hard for me to stop my tears.
"Y-You have no idea kung ga'no ko na kagustong sabihin 'yon sa'yo, Samantha.." she started with her low voice.
"Noon ko pa gustong sabihin 'yon sa'yo pero masyado ka ng nasaktan sa mga nangyari kina kuya kaya hindi ko magawang sabihin 'yon sa'yo. Sana naman mainitndihan mo'ko.." She went on saka mas lalo pang humagulgol ng iyak.
Out of the corner of my tear-blurry eyes, I can see her tears marred her cheeks now. Making my hand to itch with want to pull her now and comfort her.
But no. Not until she'd tell me everything. Kaya naman mas lalo ko pang tinatagan ang sarili ko not to burst out in tears.
"Then why don't you tell me now, auntie? Sabihin mo sa'kin ngayon ang totoo dito mismo sa harap ng puntod nila dad. Marami kang alam hindi ba pero ang gusto mo, itago nalang 'yon lahat mula sa'kin."
"A-Ano pa bang gusto mong malaman, Samantha? Alam mo na ang tungkol sa pagkatao mo so what else should I have to tell you now?"
Not liking her voice, sounding like she had nothing she was keeping from me, matapang ko ng hinarap ito and stared at her straight to her teary eyes.
"Marami..My real parents. Sino sila at bakit kinailangan nila akong ipamigay? Hindi ba nila ako mahal? Isa ba akong pagkakamali that's why they have done that??"
Hearing that, her lips trembled as more tears sprung out of her eyes.
"No. No. You're not a mistake, Samantha. Please don't even think about that." She said while she kept shaking her head.
"Mahal ka nila, Samantha and you are not a mistake!"
"Then if that was the case, bakit kailangan pa nila akong ipamigay kung totoo nga 'yong sinasabi mo???"
This time, hindi ko na mapigilang maluha na rin.
"Kailangan ko ng mga sagot, auntie. I so badly want your honest answer now before I'd totally go mad this time. Alam mong ikaw lang 'yong pwede 'kong pagtanungan so please tell me. That's all what I've wanted to know from you now..."
"Samantha.. kailangan mo ba talaga akong pahirapan ng ganito??"
An excruciating pain crept into me again when she sounded so tormented while looking at me habang patuloy lang itong lumuluha sa harapan ko.
I quickly shed my tears saka taas noong sinagot ito.
"Kahit na ayokong gawin to sa'yo, but I have to. I won't ask you about dad and mom's death anymore as long as you'd atleast tell me about my real identity. Please..." I plead as I kept wiping my tears that kept rolling on my cheeks.
"Please auntie. Please. Sino sila? At sino ba talaga ako? You know I never beg anyone before but I'm doing this now-----"
"No. Ayoko. Ayoko."
My lips instantly thinned in line when she quickly refused that with a shook of her head.
"'Wag mo 'kong pilitin, Samantha. Just ask me about your case but not that. I can't do that."
"Pero karapatan ko 'yong malaman lahat, Auntie!"
"No. Ayoko." She firmly refused, stretching my patience to end.
"Ayokong malaman mo 'yon dahil tiyak kamumuhian mo lang ako at tiyak mas lalo lang gugulo ang buhay mo, Samantha at 'yan ang pinakaayaw kong mangyari! Your dad won't want that as well kaya hindi---"
"But I deserve to know that!" I snapped at her in a shout which taken her aback.
I want to apologize now but I am so desperate now.
"I deserve that so just tell me everything and just let me decide if I have to despise you or not after I heard everything! Pagkatao ko 'yon so I deserve that at hindi dahil ayaw niyo o ayaw nila dad."
When I ended that in a rather angry shout, not minding if anyone could hear us, her lips were now trembling so much as she sobbed more.
"I-I just don't want to hurt you, Samantha--"
"But I was already hurt more than you've think I was, auntie kaya utang na loob! Sabihin mo na sa'kin ngayon! Hindi na'ko bata at hindi ako tanga para hindi malalaman lahat ng tinatago niyo sa'kin!"
More tears came out from her eyes as she clamped her mouth. To probably muffled her cry.
Her shoulders were shaking as she kept sobbing so hard.
And it pains me so much seeing her like this.
God knows how much I wanted to comfort her now and tell her that everything will be alright but I have to stop that urge because it wasn't alright for me!
"Hindi mo'ko naiintindihan. Hindi mo'ko naiinitindihan..." She sobbed in almost a whisper as she slowly kneeled down before my parents' gravestones while shaking in sobs.
When another tears rolled down on my cheeks, I quickly wiped it off with the side of my palm.
"Then let me understand that then.."
"No. Kapag sasabihin ko 'yon sa'yo, tiyak kamumuhian mo'ko..."
"And why would I be? Bakit? Kasalanan mo ba kung ipinaampon man ako ng mga tunay kong magulang? Kasalanan mo ba kung bakit---"
"Kasalanan ko nga, Samantha..."
"Kasalanan--" I halted with my words and then frowned in confusions nang bigla nalang niyang sabihin 'yon, saying that in between his cry habang yumuyogyog pa lalo ang mga balikat nito ngayon.
"What do you mean kasalanan mo, auntie? Anong kasalanan mo?" Agad na tanong ko rito as I kneeled down beside her, wanted her to tell me kung anong ibig sabihin nito.
She inhaled a breath before she slowly turned to me with tears-stained face and a bitter smile.
"Kasalanan ko talaga kung bakit sila ang nag-aruga sa'yo at hindi ang tunay mong mga magulang, Samantha.. kasalanan ko ang lahat.." she insisted again, confusing me more.
"I-I don't understand.." I answered while fumbling for words to tell.
Could it be possible na sinisisi nito ang sarili nito dahil nagkakaganito na'ko ngayon?
When that thought came in mind, I braced each of her shoulder to force her to face me.
"Hindi kita maintindihan, auntie. A-Anong ibig mong sabihin na kasalanan mo? You were always there for me simula pagkabata ko kaya bakit magiging kasalanan mo ito? You've done nothing wrong but to be always there for me and raised me like your own daughter simula ng mawala sina dad kaya----" Napatigil na'ko sa pagsasalita when she suddenly bursts out into tears again as she kept shaking her head, alarming me more.
"A-Auntie, I'm sorry.. I'm sorry kung ginagawa ko man ito sa inyo. Gulong-gulo lang ang utak ko. Gusto ko lang---"
My mouth snapped shut when she suddenly cupped both of my cheeks while staring straight to my blurry eyes, mirroring her own. Her lips was still shaking but it was in a tight pursed now.
"Wala kang kasalanan, Samantha kaya wag kang humingi ng tawad sa'kin. It should be me who should say that. Ako 'yong dapat sisihin ng lahat dahil 'ako'---" she heaved up a breath, na para bang hirap na hirap itong bigkasin ang mga susunod nitong sasabihin.
"A-Ako 'yon, Samantha.. ako 'yong nagpaampon sa'yo kina kuya kaya kasalanan ko, Samantha...Kasalanan ko ang lahat dahil ipinanganak kita at naging duwag ako na palakihin ka!!"
Hearing that, I froze as my eyes widened in shock ---- no, shock was just an understatement for that.
I didn't even notice I've release my hold at her as I slowly sat down on the ground. And then I suddenly felt out of breath.
I clutched my chest and gasped for an air.
"Ipinanganak ako.. I-Ipinanganak ako... So this could only mean that...." I mumbled like crazy as I took in that piece of news.
"Ipinanganak mo'ko then you are--"I sucked a desperate breath and swallowed hard.
This time, breathing became more hard for me to do as hot tears blurred my vision more. Disabling me to talk now.
Narinig kong humagulgol na naman ito ng iyak sa harapan ko and then I was suddenly pulled into her arms.
I don't want anyone to touch me now but I was just too dumbfounded right now to even push her off now.
"I'm sorry, Samantha. I'm sorry. Hindi ko gustong gawin 'yon sa'yo. Hindi ko gustong mangyari 'to sa'yo.. I'm sorry.." she kept saying that while tightly hugging me in her arms.
Dahilan para tuluyan na'kong napahagulgol ng iyak rito as my mind had finally took in everything.
"I'm sorry.... I'm sorry..." Rinig kong palaging sambit nito sa'kin as I just kept crying against her.
So this is why she kept insisting na kasalanan niya at kakamuhian ko ito kapag nalaman ko 'yon.. dahil dun. It was because of the fact that she's my real mother.
Siya ang taong pilit kong hinahanap pero nasa tabi ko lang pala... Nasa tabi ko lang pala pero hindi ko man lang alam 'yon until now. At hindi ko man lang ito binigyan ng pansin at hinayaan ko lang na mag-isa ito kahit na gustung-gusto nitong makasama ako.
At hinayaan niya lang akong sabihan ko ito ng kung anu-anong masasakit na salita noon just because she was stopping me to continue my case.
And I hate myself for that! And I hate her for keeping this from me!
Just thinking all that, I started to wail like a crying baby now against her chest dahil parang hindi ko na kayang itago ang lahat ng sakit sa dibdib ko. And if I won't let it out, I felt like my chest would explode anytime.
"I'm sorry... G-Gusto lang kitang protektahan, Samantha.. Gusto ka lang naming...protektahan kaya pinilit naming itago 'yon sa'yo.." she uttered in between her sobs while tightly hugging me like she was scared to let me go.
"Mahal na mahal kita, Samantha kaya kahit na kasuklaman mo 'ko ngayon," I glanced up at her nang bigla nalang nyang hawakan ang mukha ko and forced me to look at her.
She was still crying but I can see through her eyes that she was just trying so hard to be strong.
"I want you to stop asking me who your real father is at kung sino man ang maaaring may pakana ng pagkamatay ng dad at mom mo dahil 'yan din ang gugustuhin nilang mangyari kung nabubuhay lang sila rito. I already give you the answer you want so never ask me anything again."
That made me sniffed and frowned at her, not liking what she was demanding me to do now.
"What do you mean? Sinasabi mo bang pabayaan ko na naman ang taong 'yon at tigilan na naman ang kasong 'to?" Inis na tanong ko rito while grudgingly wiping off my tears and taking her hands off of me.
"And why would you want to stop me asking who my real father is? Talaga bang ipagkakait mo pa rin sa'kin ang bagay na'yon kahit 'yon lang?"
"No, Samantha." Agad na sagot nito while shaking her head.
"This is just for your own sake! Pinoprotektahan lang kita gaya ng lagi naming ginagawa ng dad at mom mo mula paman noon." She reasoned out, looking so tormented again.
"Kaya sana naman, pakinggan mo naman ako kahit minsan lang, Samantha!"
"For what? Para ilayo na naman ako sa mga katotohanan?" Galit ng tanong ko rito as I pushed her off saka agad ng tumayo mula dun, ignoring her cry.
"Sino ba kasi ang tunay kong ama? Bakit hindi niyo kayang aminin 'yon sa'kin ngayon?"
"You can start despising me now, Samantha but you can't make me tell you that." Matigas na sagot nito as she got up on her feet as well.
"This is just to protect you from him. kaya."
"Then does this mean, he's still alive kaya hindi mo maamin 'yon hindi ba? He is still alive kaya hindi mo masabi sa'kin kung sino siya.."
I waited for her to answer pero nang hindi ito sumagot and just stayed there without even looking straight to my eyes, I decided to talk instead with gritted teeth dahil parang alam ko na ang sagot sa tanong kong 'yon..
"Then fine. Kung hindi mo talaga 'yon sasabihin, then I'll just find him myself and ask him why you were trying so hard to protect me from him, from my own father when a father would never hurt his daughter!" Then with that, tumalikod na'ko rito saka patakbo ng umalis sa lugar na'yon.
"SAMANTHA! Saan ka pupunta??"
Rinig kong sigaw nito but I paid no heed of it saka tuloy-tuloy lang sa pagtakbo palabas ng lugar na'yon.
"SAMANTHA! Makinig ka muna sa'kin!"
Again, I heard her shouted from behind me kaya isa lang ang ibig sabihin nito, hinahabol niya 'ko. With that thought, I hastened up my steps while wiping off the tears that kept rolling on my cheeks.
In just a few seconds, nakalabas na'ko sa lugar na'yon. I quickly get into my car saka agad ng pinaandar ang makina nito before I swiftly pulled back my car to the side and drove off.
From my rearview mirror, I could see her followed my car with her gaze habang luhang-luha parin ito.
At kahit na naiinis ako rito, hindi ko mapigilang masaktan habang nakikita itong ganito. And it was because of me. It was because of me why she was suffering this much.
Pero hindi naman sana ito masasaktan ng ganito if she would just tell me everything. That's what I only need anyway. But as stubborn as she was, hindi niya parin nagawang sabihin ang lahat sa'kin.
Like you, Sam. Like you.. As stubborn as you.
When my mind commented that, tears started to blur my eyes again as I was tightly holding the steering wheel.
So she was my mom... I still have a mother and it could be possible na buhay pa rin ang tunay kong ama.
Just the thought na posibleng may pamilya pang naiwan sa'kin na pwede kong buuin, hindi ko mapigilang matuwa sa posibilidad na'yon as hope bloomed inside me.
With that thought, mas lalo ko pang binilisan ang takbo ng sasakyan ko, driving without an exact direction of where I was heading to. Just trailing along the familiar zigzag path back to Metro Manila with huge trees in every side of the road.
I felt my phone vibrated inside my pocket again.
And knowing who it was, I quickly fished it out with my still blurry eyes and then answered that call without even checking the phone screen.
I just wanted to hear his voice now. I just wanted someone to tell me na magiging okay ang lahat and that crying doesn't suit me kaya dapat na'kong tumigil sa kaiiyak.
"Ms. Javier, magkita tayo ngayon."
I couldn't help but burst into tears again when I heard that familiar deep voice.
"M-Mr. Del Fuero..." I called out with groggy voice.
Hindi agad ito umimik but after a few seconds, I suddenly heard him cursed out from the other line.
"Why are you crying this time? Where are you now? Pupuntahan kita."
When I heard that cold but worried voice, mas lalo pa'kong napaluha as I'm starting to miss him now. Missing him keep annoying me to hell. He was like that anyway. Nagagawa nitong pawiin kung anumang problema ang kinakaharap ko with him kept ticking me off and getting into my nerves.
"Ms. Javier! I'm asking you why you are crying this time at hindi para iyakan mo pa'ko lalo! I'm going to be out of my mind now kapag hindi kapa nagsalita ngayon!" Galit ng tanong nito sa kabilang linya. I can even imagine him now with his nostrils flaring out dahil sa inis nito sa'kin.
With that thought, napapatawa nalang ako rito though I'm still crying in tears.
"Ms. Javier! I swear I'm going to sack you later kapag hindi kapa magsasalita ngayon! Just wait right there, I will come and get you myself." He growled out and then a revving sound of an engine followed.
I think he was really going to come here and get me himself.
Again, hindi ko mapigilang mapatawa uli na parang baliw without taking my eyes on the road.
I heard him grumbled an incoherent words on the other line but he didn't talked anyway.
Hindi ko alam kung bakit natutuwa pa'ko ngayon rito. Blinking the tears from my eyes, I smiled.
"I'm driving back to the City now.."
"Then pulled your car to the side this instant! I don't think you're in your right mind now to drive! Do it now. I'm warning you."
Hearing his threat, I couldn't help but chuckled out at that as tears just kept falling. He sounded so frustrated right now.
"Ms. Javier. I'm warning you... Stop your car now and stop laughing at me for goodness'sake! I will really sack you and---- and--"
"And what, Mr. Del Fuero?" Nakangiting tanong ko rito when I think he can't think of anything to threaten me.
"And I will locked you up in my house again para hindi ka na makaalis pa uli!"
"If that was the case, I guess I shouldn't just let you see me again then."
A loud growl instantly came off from him when I answered that. Dahilan mas lalo pa'kong mapatawa rito as I wiped my tears.
"Oh God!! I really wonder why I even like a stubborn woman like you!"
Hearing that, I laughed more. Sensing how frustrated he was right now
No wonder why I love this bastard. He prefer to show his concern through saying harsh words and throwing you an ample of threats. His weird way of comforting someone.
"SAMANTHA JAVIER! Stop laughing at me!!"
I just keep laughing at him as I kept shaking my head in refusals. I'm sure nagmumukha na'kong baliw ngayon rito.
"For God's sake! I really wonder why I even like a crazy woman like you!" Nanggagalaiti ng sigaw nito sa kabilang linya which made me stupidly grinned at that now.
"Maybe because I'm crazy at 'yon ang gusto mo sa isang babae?"
"Yeah. Yeah. I agree with that. You are crazy and that's why I love you because you are damnably crazy woman!"
I suddenly stepped the brake when he suddenly uttered that, causing my car to screech into a sudden halt as my tears suddenly stopped.
"Ms. Javier???!!! What happened? Ano 'tong naririnig ko diyan ngayon?? Did something happened?" I heard him incessantly asked that from the other line with obvious worry in his voice.
Hindi ako umimik and just stiffly sat there without even breathing habang ang lakas naman ng tibok ng puso ko ngayon.
H-He loves me? Did I heard him confessed that just now?
"Ms. Javier! I'm asking you! Okay ka lang ba?!"
Nang marinig ko uli ang boses niyang 'yon, I blinked up a few times as my breathing came back but the loud thudding in my chest was still there.
"Ms. Javier? Are you---"
"I-I'm fine..." Tanging sagot ko lang rito as I tried to pull my senses back. And when I did, agad ko namang pinatakbo uli ang sasakyan ko.
"You don't seem you are, Ms. Javier. Stop your car right now and just wait for me there. Papunta na'ko ngayon dyan."
Hearing him saying all that, I can't stop myself but smiled as fresh tears swelled up from my eyes.
Not because I'm sad and mesirable kundi dahil ang saya ko lang dahil sa alam kong may pamilya pa'kong natitira and I have this man. This granite headed bastard na lagi akong inaasar but now, he"s making me smile.
And I never felt this way again after a decade.
With that, binilisan ko na ang takbo ng sasakyan. The want to see him now was just too strong. I don't think I should stop my feelings for him now.
I don't want to stop myself anymore at gusto ko na ring sabihin rito that I have the same feeling for him and that I'm falling for him now....
I noticed a black car at the rearview mirror was speeding up from behind me, trying to overtake my car kaya naman kinabig ko na ang manibela pakanan to make way for him.
"Mr. Del Fuero.." mahinang tawag ko rito maya-maya habang ang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib ko ngayon.
I could even hear my own heartbeats right now pero may kailangan lang akong sabihin rito ngayon na hindi dapat ipagpabukas o antayin man lang na makita ko ito mamaya.
"What now? Aasarin mo na naman ba'ko dahil problemado ka ngayon and you need a clown right now na magpapatawa sa'yo?"
Again, I chuckled at that as I shook my head, as if he can see me now.
"No... Gusto ko lang sagutin ang tanong mo sa'kin kagabi.." I said while biting my lower lips.
A sudden screeching of wheels can be heard next from the line, probably he made a sudden stop when he heard me.
For a few seconds, nanatili lang itong walang imik sa kabilang linya. Pero maya-maya lang, I heard him cleared out his throat bago ito nagsalita.
"And may I know your answer to that question now?"
I smiled when I heard his curious voice. And wiping my tears from my cheeks, I gave him my answer.
"Yes." I answered without giving it a second thought.
"Yes, bastard. Gustong-gusto rin kita and I was just lying when I said I don't like you. Yes, I have this want to just kill you everytime I'm with you but that's just how I come to like you ------"
I wasn't able to complete my sentence when that same black car earlier suddenly appeared before my car. Surprising me with its suddenness which caused me to let go of my phone sabay kabig ng manibela pakanan. I was able to avoid bumping into that car but not the tree ahead that I hadn't even noticed until now.
Sa lakas ng takbo ko, a hard impact was expected the moment I've bumped into it. Good thing I had my seatbelt with me so I hadn't bumped my head that hard.
I sucked a deep breath when an agonizing pain came next. I grimaced and clutched my head with trembling hands. I attempted to move my legs but I grunted and grimaced more when I felt like a thousand needles were pricking into my legs.
"Ms. Javier???! What happened?? Ms. Javier???"
I heard him kept calling my name from the other line. My phone was just beside my foot kaya rinig na rinig ko parin ang sigaw niyang 'yon.
I wanted to answer him but I could even hardly move my mouth right now kaya naman pinilit ko nalang na gumalaw sa upuan ko.
With my eyes couldn't even opened right, I sucked a deep breath while trying to unbuckle my seatbelt. Kahit hindi ko mabuksan ng maayos ang mga mata ko ngayon, alam kong umuusok ngayon ang harapang bahagi ng sasakyan.
And I have to get out of here. I have to stay outside and hail any car para makaalis rito.
When I was able to unbuckle my seatbelt, pinilit ko ng buksan ang pintuan sa tabi ko but to my surprise, bigla nalang bumukas ang pintuang 'yon and before I could even utter the word 'help', bigla nalang may bumatok ng malakas sa ulo ko, making my eyes rolled back to utter unconsciousness.
~~~~~~~~