Dropping Noah off at school, like every morning, is once again one of the hardest things she has to do. It's better for him to be out of the house, especially now since Jack will be home a lot more. It's now 9 am and she has been sitting in the car in front of the house not wanting to go inside. Just hoping for an excuse to be anywhere else. A call, an emergency...anything.
Orange juice.
We need orange juice, don't we? I'm sure we do. Caroline puts the car into reverse and begins the drive to the furthest grocery store. On arrival, she lets out a breath of relief letting her body relax against the warm leather seats. She sits for a few minutes just observing the people going in and out of the store.
It's somewhat intriguing isn't it, how someone can be suffering so much without others knowing. The world doesn't stop for anyone does it? The sun shines its brightest, the sky its bluest; the people going in and out of the store know nothing of her situation. They don't know who she is, where she comes from. All they see is a woman out to buy her groceries. For all, they know she could be the happiest person on earth. This goes vice verse though, she knows nothing of these people. She often finds herself wondering about their unique stories. Who are they? Do they live a good life? Are they content? This is one of the reasons why she likes to drive so far from home, it satiates her need to feel. The feeling she gets when being perceived by people who know nothing of her story is exhilarating. In those moments she can choose to be whoever she wants and they wouldn't know. It's the sad kind of exhilarating. Here she is suffering and no one stops to notice, or maybe they do notice? The world doesn't care for one measly woman, all they'll say is that someone has it worse won't they? This isn't to say it's not true, yet... something about the sun beaming down on her so happily seems unfair. It really is a sad and beautiful world isn't it?
In the store, Caroline passes all kinds of people, old, young, families, people on their own, and at one point even a pigeon. She aimlessly walks through the aisles and stops short when she sees a young couple playfully arguing. The man has the widest smile on his face as he teases the woman. He pulls her into his arms and begins to sway. A bright blush fills the woman's cheeks as she slaps him gently on the arm telling him to let her go. "Just sway with me for a little won't you Joony?" he beams down at her and she lets out a sigh giving in. There they stand, swaying to the sounds of the grocery store. The beeping of the cash registers, the bustling wheels of the carts, and the faint buzz of voices. I have no clue how he could see the romance in such a situation, yet there they stand with loving gazes resting upon each other.
A few seconds pass and Caroline comes out of her dazed state only to see a man standing on the other end of the aisle gazing at the couple how she had been just before. At least I'm not the only one suffering, right? She locks eyes with the man, a silent conversation takes place as they look at each other. Both feeling reminiscent of what once was and will never be again.
Caroline abruptly clears her throat and adjusts the wedding ring which had begun feeling like a heavyweight. The couple stops short surprised by the sudden knowledge of her presence. They share a shy smile and walk out of the aisle together holding hands.
There's the juice. At the end of the aisle, her one-way ticket home waits as she treads slowly towards the juice to the end. The man begins walking down the aisle in her direction as well. She takes this time to observe his appearance, he is quite a handsome man. He has sharp features, intimidating actually. As he gets closer she gets a better look at his eyes; contrary to his other features, his eyes are gentle and soft. A single piece of hair falls across his left eye down to his cheek. 5 more steps down she sees it's not a piece of hair; rather a thin scar gracing the left side of his face. As she continues to look at the tall man with his hair in a half up half down style she can't help but think he is the complete opposite of her husband Jack.
Though the aisle is relatively short it seems as if the walk to the other end has taken her years. The man never once looks at her again. Taking the hint Caroline looks straight ahead only stopping when they walk past each other and their arms brush and she flinches away. The man stops walking. For a second she thinks he may do something but he simply turns his head towards her. When their eyes lock she feels exposed like he can see her deepest secrets- see her greatest shame. Caroline pulls her gaze away and speed walks towards the orange juice and grabs it before exiting the aisle.
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