I had no idea where Suit was. I actually had a lot of no ideas where he was concerned and that did not bother me one bit. I opened the back door for Pee Wee to jump in the Rover. "Don't eat the Rover." I ordered the slobbery canine. I pulled out my phone and took a picture of him texting it to my friend Valerie. She was a vet. She would know what type of dog he is. She is actually labeled Val the Vet in my phone not that I know any other Vals but I like clarity.
Me: Hey Val. What kind of dog is this?
The little dots danced so I knew she was answering me.
Val the Vet: Looks like he has some great dane and maybe some bull mastiff. Why do you have a dog in your car?
Me: I am dog sitting.
Val the Vet: You don't like animals.
Me: I don't hate them.
Val the Vet: Where are you keeping him?
Me: Is that a trick question?
Me: in the car with me
Dots danced then went away then danced again then went away then danced again.
Val the Vet: I don't even know how to react to that
Me: His name is Pee Wee
Val the Vet: Pee Wee?
Me: I didn't name him
Val the Vet: Obviously
Val the Vet: How old is he?
I looked at Pee Wee and asked, "How old are you?" He woofed twice. Hmm 2 then. Okay.
Me: He said he is two.
Val the Vet: Who said he is two? You aren't with a man on Valentine's day are you?
Me: the dog
Val the Vet: The dog what?
Me: the dog told me he was 2. I asked him. He woofed twice so I took that to mean he is two.
The dots danced for a bit then stopped. I waited. They did not dance again so I put my phone in the phone holster on the dash and turned on the Rover. I looked into the rearview mirror at Pee Wee.
"Do you like your name? Do you want me to call you Pee Wee?" I asked him. He growled.
"I take that as a no. What is your spirit name doggy? What do you want me to call you?
I started going through the names I told Suit earlier.
"Zues?" he growled
"Hercules?" he whined.
"Perseus?" he looked away from me clearly offended at that one.
I wracked my brain. "Bull Dane?" he actually covered his ears on that one. "Oh-kay, geesh no need to get cranky."
"Fang?" still no reaction.
"Gunner?" nothing. He actually looked bored.
"Trigger?" his head perked up but still not a clear affirmative.
"I know!" I exclaimed. "Tank." I said clearly. He howled.
"You like that huh? Tank?" He woofed and slurped my direction.
"Alright then, Tank it is. That is a much better name. I mean what was Jerry thinking naming you Pee Wee. The only Pee Wee I know is Pee Wee Herman and he is fracking annoying and whiny, and wimpy. You are not whiny and wimpy. You are rumbly and rambo-ish`` Now I have a dog to talk to, not nearly as weird when I talk out loud as when I am by myself.
"Jessie or Leslie?" I asked Tank. He growled.
"That is what I was thinking. Let's get the wannabe racer out of the way and then deal with the man mauler." I tapped the gps and found where I had put in Jessie's home address.
We arrived about twenty minutes later at a fairly decent apartment complex obviously he spent all his money on his car. I saw Jessie's bright green Honda Civic Si most likely tricked out in the parking lot. Good he is here. I left the door slightly open in case I needed some Tank back up. "Stay in the car until I call you." I told him he slurped but stayed.
I walked up the stairs to the third floor, of it is the third floor. They never live on the ground floor. I located the right door and knocked loudly. I could hear the TV on and there was shouting. It sounded like they were playing a video game. I knocked again and shouted, "Jessie! Open the door!" There was no response and the noise level didn't change. I tried the door knob. It was open. Dumbass. I opened the door and leaned casually against the frame taking in the scene. There were four boy-men or maybe man-boys, I am not sure at this point. They looked to be around 25 to 30, They were intently playing a video game.
"Whatcha guys playing?" I asked casually.
"Halo 3." one of the man-boys answered.
"Who is winning?" I asked. That is when they finally looked up. All of them just stared at me. One of them had the foresight to pause the game. I waved.
"Hey boys." I said with a flirty smile. One of them, Jessie, I presume since he matched the picture in the file and this apartment was in his name along with 2 others which I was guessing to be in the crowd, looked around and noticed the state of the apartment. It looked like they were in the middle of a Halo 3 marathon. Pizza boxes and energy drinks in different stages of fullness everywhere. It smelled like a locker room. How long had they been playing? Jessie realized it was futile to try to clean and settled back down.
"Who are you?" Jessie asked.
"You know who I am Jessie." I said sweetly. "I'm your escort. Ready to take you to the station. You missed your court date. They don't like when you say you will be somewhere and then you don't show up. It is rude and it is against the law." As I spoke his eyes got wider and wider.
"Oh shit!" he said. "We have been playing since Yesterday morning. I forgot. Can we just tell them I am sorry and it will all be better?" he whined. What is it with the whining today?
"Yes, yes we can Jessie. I will even give you a ride there and let them know you are there to apologize and you can reset the date." I deliberately left out the part where he would probably spend until that reset date in the company of several unsavory characters hosted by the county.
"And what if I don't want to go?" He eyed me up and down most likely trying to decide if he could take me. I bet he was thinking if his man-boy buds helped him out he could get away.
"Jessie." I said in my best impression of a disappointed mom voice, "You know you have to come with me."
"Right now? We are in the middle of a game he continues whining.
"Not necesarily." I paused for effect. "I tell you what. I will challenge you to a quick game in Halo 3. We'll play mercenary style. If you beat me, I will let you be until tomorrow. If I win, you come with me today. No resistance, no fuss."
Jessie smirked and looked at his man-boy friends who were also smirking.
I shut the door and walked into the room trying not to breathe too deeply. I walked over to the couch, took the controller from one of them and sat next to Jessie. Everyone else stood behind the couch which was several levels down from mine.
"No interference." I stated and held out my hands for the other controllers. I popped the batteries out of them and placed them on the table amongst the pizza boxes and monster cans.
"You are not very trusting." one of them stated.
"I am aware of human nature." I retorted. A mere 45 minutes later, I threw my hands in the air and gave a victory shout. "Take that little man-boy!" I turned to high five the group behind the couch. I turned to Jessie. "Let's go Jessie." I said and he got a panicked look in his eyes and started to run. I sighed. "Don't even think about it man-boys." I said right before I let out a piercing whistle. I could hear Jessie running down the stairs, I turned to wave at the man-boys and said, "later." as I followed. I jogged down the steps after Jessie vaulting over the last set to the ground just in time to see Tank launch himself at Jessie's back and knock him down then put his front paws on his back and put his jaws around the back of his neck.
"Good job, Tank. Who's a good boy?" I cooed. He wagged his tail without letting go of Jessie's neck. Tank moved his paws off of Jessie but kept his mouth clamped as I pulled out handcuffs and secured his hands.
"You can let go now, Tank." I said. "Why'd you run Jessie? You told me you would come with me if I beat you no resistance, no fuss. That was resistance, that was fuss Jessie." I stated as I hauled him off the ground and toward the Rover. I secured him to the S hooks and for good measure zip tied his feet to the hooks there too. I don't usually use those but Jessie made me angry and I did not put it past his whiny man-boy attitude to not kick my seat.
"Get in, Tank." I ordered as I moved out of the door.
"Wait! You can't put that monster back here with me. It is not safe." Jessie whined.
"It's okay. Tank doesn't need a seat belt." I deliberately misunderstood him.
"Tank. Don't drool on him." Tank gave a half-hearted woof and settled down beside Jessie."If he moves, eat him." I said to Tank causing Jessie to pale. I turned my face to hide my smile as I got in the driver's seat.