I stare over at the burning embers, wishing I could just roll over and kill myself to end this inevitable doom. As I feel Steven slowly lowering himself on top of me, my body shivers.
While staring at the fire, I notice Jessica's ax laying on the ground beside me. In a mid-panic, I reach across and snatch it off the ground. I raise it in the air and whack Steven across the head.
He stumbles onto the ground and I scramble backwards away from him. He chuckles, then mumbles, "Shit, you still got a lot of fight in you." Steven slowly stands up again.
Noticing the purple bruise already forming on the side of his head, I realize that in my sudden action that I only whacked him with the blunt end of the ax. "You were supposed to be dead!" I scream at him.
"Yeah," he says. "I guess some people are more empathetic than others." Steven steadies himself, then starts running towards me. I do the only thing that I can imagine, although I'm scared. I close my eyes as I raise the ax and bring it down onto Steven's body.
When I open my eyes again, I see blood spattered across Steven's face. The ax is lodged in his shoulder, and he's gasping for air. He drops to his knees on the ground. I yank the ax out of his shoulder.
In an attempt to throw me off my guard, Steven knocks me by my legs to the ground. Before I can regain myself and pick up the ax, he's already running off down the forest. I'm tempted to run after him, but I have a feeling that he won't be coming back.
I wait for his silhouette to disappear into the trees. Even after I know he's long gone, I still wait in silence and shock. This bastard found me lying helpless in the woods, and he took his chances.
After reliving the traumatic events again and again, I finally gain the courage to pick my backpack up off the ground. I hold the ax in my hand as I slowly make my way back to the forest.
It's still dark, so my senses are already on high alert. Every noise that comes from within the whispering trees shakes me to my core. I brace myself for any attack, knowing that Steven is still out there somewhere.
It's still dark once I make it back to the wall. Realizing that my clothes are coated in Steven's blood, I'm glad to be back. It's comforting to know that at the end of this, I can still take a shower.
I poke my foot through the hole and edge my way through, making sure that my head clears the entrance. It's darker now, so it's hard to tell where it's okay to enter. Once I make it through the small crevice, I take a moment to try and remember which direction to go to get to our place.
I finally remember the directions but I'm frozen when I hear voices and people heading this direction. Was the community taken over by these other people? I hold the ax firmly in my hand and brace for the worse.
When I finally see Jessica round the corner, I'm reminded that I have bigger fish to fry. She looks scared shitless to see me, and rightfully so. This bitch left me to die in the woods. My father comes around the corner shortly after Jessica.
In a fit of rage, I let my anger get the best of me. Raising the ax above my head, I scream, "You bitch!" and charge for Jessica. Dad runs up and pushes me back, holding me with his entire body.
"Lizzy, put the ax down!", he yells at me. I put up a fight, still trying to get past him. Finally, I give up and lower the ax to my side. My fingers let go of the wooden handle and I let it fall onto the ground.
Dad stands in shock at my anger and my actions. I flip Jessica off with unspoken satisfaction, then storm off towards the house.
As the warm, soothing water rolls down my back, I let all my frustrations and anger wash away. Taking showers makes me feel so anew. Don't get me wrong, I love baths. However, it's very different when you're disgusting. I don't feel like sitting in someone else's blood for fifteen minutes.
Dad knocks on the door for the second time. "Lizzy, please, talk to me when you're out of there. I need to know what happened."
I finally give into his demands. I shut the water off, knowing that I'm already clean enough. I've just been procrastinating on telling my father about the lovely night I just had.
I open the curtain and snatch the towel off the rack. I first dry my hair somewhat, and then work my way down to my feet. I finally wrap the towel around my head while I step out of the shower.
The tile floor is cold and I hop around on my feet for a bit while I struggle to pull my clothes on. As my pants slide up my bare legs, I shudder again at the thought of Steven pulling my pants down.
I breathe deeply a couple of times to calm my nerves. I finally open the bathroom door. Dad's sitting on the couch in the living room, patiently waiting for my arrival. His hands are tucked in between his legs.
I plop down onto the couch, sitting a few feet away from him. There's no easy way to start this conversation.
"It was Steven," I plainly tell him. "He attacked me."
Dad jumps up from the couch, but forces himself to breathe and sit back down. "How? You shot him. There's no way he survived that."
I shake my head in disbelief. "Yeah, I know. That's what I thought too."
"What were you doing out in the woods anyway? Didn't you know that it wasn't safe, with the attack going on?", my father scolds me.
I throw my hands up in defense. "It wasn't really my idea. It was actually Jessica's."
My dad looks puzzled. "What do you mean?", he asks, concerned.
"Jessica had the idea of sneaking off during the attack," I start off. "She had this plan to hide in the woods until the attack was over, so we would be safe. In the middle of the night, she left me there. She put out the fire and left me in the pitch black with only an ax and my backpack." I leave out the details of Steven almost raping me, because I can't go through those events again.
"So you aren't hurt, right?" Dad asks me.
"No, I'm fine." I reassure him. He pushes himself off the couch and grabs his flashlight. "Where are you going?" I ask him. My father stubbornly shakes his head.
"I'm going to talk to Jessica, and I'm going to tell her that her actions weren't okay. She's going to get punishment for this." I breathe a sigh of relief, knowing that she will get some sort of reprimanding.
He walks out the front door into the dark, and I wave him goodbye as the door closes. He waves back, then takes off down the sidewalk.
I lay down on the couch. My head rests on the soft cushions. I close my eyes and try to sleep.
Steven's breathing on me now. He's put himself inside of me, and I know there's no escaping now. I'm crying trying to get away from him. My hands push against the ground, but my fingers just keep slipping. He breathes against me and whispers, "This is how it should be."
I jolt awake from the vision, suddenly realizing that it was just a dream. I begin to sob uncontrollably, and I lay down again to try and get any form of rest. I pray that these nightmares will go away.
As I begin to run away down the woods, Steven laughs at me, pulling his pants up. "You can run from me, Lizzy. But I will always know where you are. You can count on that." He laughs again and it echoes through the woods as I scurry across the leaves, crying and hoping to make it home soon.
My head flies up when the front door opens, and my father walks in. I try to hide my tear-stained cheeks. I talk to him facing the wall, but he doesn't question it.
"Well?" I ask him. "How did it go?"
A long pause of silence worries me. My father breathes in, then answers. "We can't find her, Lizzy."