As I headed over towards the table I could hear my heart pounding in my ears with each step I took. My heartbeat getting louder and louder with each and every step I took until finally reaching the table taking a seat.
"So." said A-O "what did you want to talk to me about?"
she said in a rushed tone almost as if she wanted to get this over with as soon as possible. I opened my mouth as if to speak but no words came out, no words left my mouth but why? Why did that happen? This wasn't a time to chicken out just because I was nervous! This was the day I would finally let the world know about my true feelings! My feelings towards A-O! I mustered up all the strength and courage I could struggling to push the words out of my mouth.
"A-O." "I-m-I-m, I'm sorry!"
"for what?" said A-O in a weak tone grabbing her arm nervously.
"I'm sorry for hurting you! I'm sorry for being so selfish and putting myself before you just because I was too stupid to realize the most important thing I've been feeling this entire time! This entire time I was wrapped in nothing more than stupid meaningless thoughts! Thoughts that made it harder for me to realize what I felt for you…." "A-O! I-I love you!"
then a great silence fell upon the room. I looked up towards A-O's face to see what seemed to be tears.
"W-whats wrong?" I said leaning in.
"D-DON'T COME NEAR ME!"
"What!"
"I SAID STAY AWAY FROM ME! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH!"
"N-no…" I said in a weak defeated tone. "
YOU PUT ME THROUGH MORE THAN WHAT WORDS CAN EXPLAIN SO LET THIS EXPLAIN FOR YOU!" she said pulling down her sleeve revealing scars all over her wrists.
"W-what did you do!"
"THIS ISN'T WHAT I DID JIRO! IT'S WHAT YOU MADE ME DO! IVE DONE NOTHING BUT SHOW LOVE TO YOU AND CARE FOR YOU! EVEN IF YOU NEVER APPRECIATED IT! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH IT HURT HAVING THE PERSON YOU LOVE PUSH YOU AWAY NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY!"
"But I'm different now I know how I feel I'm in love with you A-O!" I said arguing back in hopes that she would calm down.
"THAT'S BULLSHIT! AND YOU KNOW IT! IF YOU REALLY FUCKING LOVED ME HOW COME YOU ALWAYS TREATED ME LIKE THE LAST PERSON YOU EVER WANTED TO SEE! IF YOU REALLY LOVED ME WHY DID YOU PUSH ME AWAY! NOW ASK YOUR SELF THIS IF YOU LOVED ME WHY DID YOU HAVE TO SEARCH AND THINK IF YOU REALLY DID! Because if you loved me you would have known from the beginning….." she said as her voice slowly died away.
I froze Mabey she was right. Mabey this was nothing more than my own misunderstanding of things. Mabey I was never meant for her and she was never meant for me.
"SAY SOMETHING!" shouted A-O. "OR DO YOU ADMIT THAT IM RIGHT! THAT THIS WAS NOTHING MORE THAN AN EMPTY MEANINGLESS ONESIDED LOVE!"
I sat there with my head down frozen with nothing to say I was speechless.
"So that's how it is huh?" said A-O."Guess I really was right…" she said heading towards the door opening it "Get out."
"What?"
"I SAID GET OUT!"
I got up from my seat heading towards the door but as I walked through the doorway I heard her say
" Please don't bother me anymore after today anything we had is now over."
I froze hesitating to take that last step outside of the door. But soon found me on the other side staring back into what seemed to be an endless doorway almost it was almost as if it were stretching for miles. Regretting walking out of the door I walked towards it but with each step, it only seemed to get farther out of reach stretching further away from reach. With each and every step I took. realizing that there was no turning back I headed home and headed towards my room locking the door behind me. Falling down to the floor leaning my back onto the door I soon found myself in tears.
"Why?! Why?! Why did fate have to treat me so cruelly?! Was it not enough just saying I love her?!"
and before I knew it all of my grief soon became anger.
"SHIT!"
I yelled as I stood up punching the wall losing all control of myself as I threw and kicked everything in sight, Rampaging for what seemed to be hours. After wearing myself out I fell to my knees slamming my fists on the floor as I cried yelling to myself about all of my mistakes blaming myself for what happened, And as I cried the night away I soon drifted to sleep dreaming of what may never be a reality. I woke up this morning to the blinding sun's light slipping through my curtains and onto my face. I rolled over letting out a sigh of exhaustion sitting up getting out of bed heading towards my closet. I opened the doors grabbing clothes and a towel heading towards the bathroom to get ready for the day ahead. Walking into the bathroom I turned on the shower stripping down as I waited for the water to get warm. As I stepped into the shower I froze remembering everything that happened yesterday falling into a trance spinning in my thoughts. As I stood there frozen in thought I was soon brought out of my trance by the sound of the bathroom door opening.
"Who is it?" I asked from the shower.
"Definitely not the only other person who lives in this house with you." said Yuki in a sarcastic tone. "
"Oh. right." I said laughing awkwardly.
"I swear you can be so stupid sometimes big bro." she said in a disappointed tone.
"I know…" I said in a weak voice.
"Sooo…. Did you fix that problem you had with A-O?" she asked desperately trying to carry on the conversation.
"Y-yeah!" I said instinctively trying to keep Yuki out of my situation. An awkward silence fell upon the room. But was then broken by Yuki saying.
"Your lying arent you?"
"N-no not at all why would I lie?!" I said in a shaky voice.
" I don't know why would you lie?" she asked in a suspicious tone.
"Mabey it has to do with the reason you were crying last night I suppose?" She said in an arrogant tone.
"Wait you were here last night!" I asked in shock.
"Yup it's not like I have any friends to go out with or anything let alone things to do."
"You sure are one lonely person…" I said under my breath
"You know I heard that right?"
"Don't care, but why didn't you tell me you were here earlier."
"Well it all started when I heard you walk in the door but something seemed a little off about you so I decided to sneak around and spy on you. Then before I knew it BOOM! It happened out of nowhere books were flying left and right and you were crying. So that's when I started recording." she said in an energetic tone.
"You what!"
"Nothing that was a joke or was it…." she said playfully.
"But I swear big bro you have absolutely no idea how to deal with your own problems at all."
"I do!" I said irritated
"Oh really? Then name a time you actually solved a problem well in your life."
"At the science fair I-"
"You broke your project then bought one that was already prepared that ended in you suspended for 3 days and disqualified from the contest."
"Then uhhh at the park when I tried to make you feel better?"
"Oh sorry, I didn't realize that acting like an idiot and breaking your arm was supposed to make me feel better."
"Why you!"
"Now now don't get angry at your own mistakes, because unlike before you got your R.C.L.S to help you!" she said proudly.
"Whats an R.C.L.S??" I asked confused.
"R! Is for RELIABLE! C! Is for CUTE! L! Is for LITTLE, And S is for SISTER! So you got your reliable cute little sister here to help you!" she said striking a pose.
"Right…" I said awkwardly. "But how exactly are you going to help?"
"Don't worry all you have to do is do what I say and trust in me because I have a plan!"