Another week that ended in failure. I have stopped counting how many elapsed by now. Lottery one day I will best you! The chosen death gladiators this week were a bunch of morons too. Their acting was pitiful. They only ended up lacerating each other pointlessly. In the end, they both got bagged for giving a pitiful show. I do not wish to even know the horrors that await them. Oh well, not my business.
Today some of my followers came to find me. A few of the ones I managed to convince. Hope for the future, dreams, yada yada. They excitedly came at me chirping about prospection. Prospection is when we drag around our weary bodies like dumbasses for hours in search of a natural cave. Of course, it isn't related to mining or the likes, because of how incredibly sturdy the ground is. Of course in such a situation I would naturally beat the fool and tell him to go F himself with his pointless endeavors. Sadly, I am a respected small cult leader. I plaster a totally real-looking smile on my face. Then I kindly explain that over the years all of the surroundings have been searched already without any success. Finding one is thus close to impossible and their energy would be better spent on worshipping the blood god. Of course in my head, I'm snickering about how that second activity serves even less of a purpose.
They are insistent. Fools. Painfully annoying fools. Can I smack them?
No, I have am a respected leader. I need to show the example.
We convene to assemble as soon as the sun goes down.
Now here I am. With a bunch of nitwits going on a dumb quest for something we won't ever find. Okay, it is probably my fault for being too convincing. And handsome, and charismatic, and …. you get it. Albeit I do look a bit withered since I have not eaten for centuries. Oh well.
So off we go. I say a few words of encouragement. I make sure to look valiant. I am cursing them all in my head. Hope they would just burn already. Get obliterated by the sun and stop bothering me. Of course, that would be bad. After all, it took me some effort to brainwash…I mean show them the way!
While there are no concrete perks to being a small cult leader it still provides a slight safety net. If a lord decides that it's time for me to die, I'll be doomed either way. But what if a lord sends a subordinate the order to get a random vampire to torture? I probably will be safe in that case. Replacing me would be a slight tiny hassle. While they don't care about my lowly existence at all….I might survive such a scenario. I don't know.
Either way. It is an opportunity to practice my acting. Gotta see the dark side of everything as we say. I'm an optimist. Able to find the best in the worst situations. But then again, I know people that dislike that tendency of mine. They can all burn for all I care.
So we are walking. And walking some more. And walking some fucking more.
Ah. This is such a pain. And every time they address me, I have to do a small impromptu speech about how we shouldn't lose hope! How we should keep striving for greatness! Until we find that mythical thing known as a cave.
Yep. How low have we fallen? We went from living in majestic castles to living like vagrants. Hoping to find a damn cave. As if it was something great and awesome! *Flips table*
Of course, being the prudent leader that I am I keep a close tab on the time. After all, we need to make sure we have ample time left to rush back to our holes. Before that deadly sun comes about. Of course, if these were the olden days, we wouldn't have to be so fearful. After all, while it counters us, big time, it usually won't instantly kill us either. That is in an optimal situation. In our weakened states, we are no match for that ruthless bright foe. Oh well.
After a while of playing scout, I figure it is time for us to head back. I take my charismatic voice number 1 variation C and explain the situation to the buffoons. And…. they refuse to head back just yet.
I guess calling them fools was overestimating them. Oh well, after a short discussion we compromise. We'll turn around soon. Not as much wiggle room as It would like, but still. Still manageable.
Some more time passes, alright time to take a firm stand and …..
*Slash*
My left arm goes flying.
What ?!
One of my most devout followers attacked me! What is wrong with him?
"What are you doing?!"
He doesn't answer. He keeps up the assault. Worse the others are joining in. 10 of them against little old me. Damnit! Have they all gone crazy?!
"What are you all doing! This goes against the teachings of the blood god!"
Apparently, my words remain unheard. They are sieging me from all sides. Front, back, top, down below. What is that last guy?! A cockroach!?
I hold my ground solidly. I am way more experienced than them.
Damn it! If only I have my left arm this would be over already.
The more we fight the more I realize I am in huge trouble. They are not that good at fighting. But I can't capitalize on the small mistakes they commit. Every time I try to I need to dodge an incapacitating blow from some random direction. I am playing a losing game.
I try diplomacy. I try anger. I try pleading. None of it works.
We end up skirmishing for hours. Then I lose. They tie me up. With a rope made of grass. How they even made one from the grass that is extremely sturdy is a wonder. I can still move around. But only extremely slowly.
This is a death sentence. By running they will have enough time to head back. I am doomed.
But why did they betray me? Why?! That I cannot understand. At all. I have been nothing but supportive of them. I even joined on this horrible mission.
Why?! I just want to know! And to kill them all. In the most violent way possible.
*Sigh*