As I near the gates mind full of worry and annoyance as well as disappointment I realized.. I might not even have a chance at all. My fast pace slows as a tear starts to drop. What am I thinking. I'm not suitable for him. I'm not even close to being like him and I'm a man too. He is best with girls. He doesn't even show interest in other males .Plus I have bad poverty! All this hits me as my inner demons start to laugh uncontrollably, mocking, and pointing at me. Now my single tear turns into a thousand as I step into the school. Face burning eyes stinging and head full,I stop at the entrance trying to console myself.
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But right as I was about to calm down I get abruptly pushed I pick myself waiting for an apology but then I see a familiar face. Not not a good one either. It was Jasoon ,my lifelong bully looked down on me with the most smug smirk possible. How did he get in?WHY did he get in but before I could move or even say a thing he says in a loud voice making sure that as many people as possible could hear, "Hey TaeKota! What are you doing standing there?Looking for that faggoted friend of yours? Or maybe you are scanning the halls for your lov-",out of anger but mostly reflex I hit him in the face.-Mind:Crap why did I do that?Am I trying to get killed?-
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This boy that I'm afraid of has bullied me like this countless times so why did I do that now?What scared me the most was that he smiled. Only then did I notice how hushed the school was. Then slowly he started taking his jacket and school shirt off as he started counting. Shit. I took a deep breath and ran as fast as I could. I noticed the farther I got away the faster he counted. I was tired and my lungs were fighting for breath so I hid in the boys bathroom..of all places. I wait about 15 minutes and when I got startled by a sound I wait another 5. Finally as soon as I walk out I get met by Jasoon. And he has his friends. A bunch of thugs.
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Kota(K):W-w-wait Jasoon it was an accident I didn't m-mean to-
Jasoon(j):(mocks)O-oh y-you didn't mean too.
-Mind:I've took a ass whooping before but last time we got in a fight he said he had something worse. Did he bring a weapon?A knife?Or..-
I glance at Jai's area hoping that I was maybe wrong. I don't wanna be raped by an homophobic douche bag. I made a silent prayer to God hoping that he'll answer.
J: I'm gonna kick your ass you bitch.
My surroundings go numb as they give me another beating ears ringing after multiple kicks to the head. End me now God. Is this the way you are responding to my prayer?I smile through the pain and close my eyes not even wanting to fight back. Even if I wanted to my energy was to low.But through the muffled sound I was receiving I heard someone yell stop. The distorted sound made the voice unrecognizable. I opened my eyes to see the brave idiot but my vision is blurry from tears and blood. I felt pain still shooting through my body. I heard commotion but finally my eyesight faded and I blacked out. I'm dead. But why can't I see heaven. Or did I go to hell?
Damn. Would my suffering go on into the next life?
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