The next couple of days were strenuous. Arianna pretty much dragged me everywhere when I wasn't doing elemental training or my daily sessions with Dr. Simmons. Either way, by the end of my first official week, I felt more tired than I ever had.
I can outrun an entire camp, and yet I've never felt so exhausted. I laid on my bed with glazed eyes. I can't keep up with her.
Due to the tiredness of my body, I didn't realize my roommates had entered.
"It's not that hard! We just have to-"
They quietened as they realized I was in the room and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. If something is wrong, why not vocalize the issue? All they do is tip-toe around me.
I heard some grunting and shuffling which piqued my interest but wasn't enough for me to physically turn.
Someone cleared their throat.
I ignored it.
They did it even louder and called out to me. "Excuse me."
I narrowed my eyes. Are they talking to me? Me? Deciding to check it out, I sat up and glanced in their direction. Three of them stood in a line while Sani sat on the edge of her bed, all of them stared at me.
"First, we'd like to say thank you." The shortest one mumbled.
The tall one pipped in. "Yeah! Sani is a good friend of ours so whenever she goes into that state we're always concerned for her. We usually have to wait until the tranquil-"
Another girl stabbed the y'all one with her elbow while adjusting her glasses. "The point is you have done us an unmeasurable favor. Thank you."
I watched as they all bowed, expressing their gratitude. I bite my tongue in confusion and glanced at Sani who simply looked at my nonchalantly.
"Secondly we'd like to introduce ourselves. My name is Dan." The short one began.
The tall one spoke next. "I'm Lizbeth or Liz for short."
The last one adjusted her glasses once again. "My name is Brye John. It's nice meet you."
Dan cleared her throat again. "So. Who are you?"
I felt a prick on my fingers and I closed my eyes. Was it beneficial to tell them my name? Was I pushing too fast?
"Hello?"
My eyes opened and I looked at them. Standing, I gave them a curt bow. "Snow Roux. Nice to meet you."
"What a pretty name!" Lizbeth exclaimed. "I wish my name was after something so beautiful! I mean I haven't seen actual snow in ages but all I know it was beautiful! The way it-"
"Okay that's enough." Brye covered her friend's mouth with a tight smile.
"Right. Let's move on!" Dan nodded and everyone proceeded to sit on the ground with their legs crossed. I stared at them oddly and they stared back at me expectedly.
Uh. "Do- do you want me to-"
"Yes. Take a seat." Dan pointed at the spot in front of me, in which I hesitantly sat down.
"If Arianna has not already explained this, I'll explain for you. Each room is an individual team created for a competition we call The Night Games. Every month, for one night, all of the solo-rooms are placed into competitions against each other."
Arianna did not bring this up. I glanced at them, hoping that my confusion wasn't visible to them. They're playing games?
"You'll be in this month's alongside us." Brye stated with a smile.
My eyes narrowed.
"I think you'll be especially perfect in this game!" Dan cackled excitedly. "We'll finally win a round!"
"We're playing hide-and-seek, and we think you'll be perfect! We all saw how you fought with Tristan the other day and you were amazing! How could a small person like you trample on a guy his size!?" Lizbeth glanced at the others, who shared the question.
"How did you do it?" Dan leaned in with a sparkle in her eyes.
"I-" I couldn't seem to open my mouth properly, my mind was still wrapping around the fact that they were playing games while training for a rebellion.
"You're overwhelming her."
To my relief, we all turned to look at Sani, who was staring at them with a scowl.
"How about we just spend the remaining hour as quiet time? I'm trying to read." She huffed and went back to the book that laid in her hands.
They all quietly turned back to me with shy smiles.
"We'll continue this later." Dan said while standing up from the ground as Bruce followed her.
"It was nice meeting you! I know we'll get along just fine!" Lizbeth chirped and made her way to her bed.
Making my way to the bed that was given to me, I sat down and watched them go about their own business.
Brye seemed to follow in suit of Sani, and opened up a large book with satisfaction.
Lizbeth, on the other hand, pulled out a small notebook and a small pencil. My eyes narrowed as she began to scribble on the pages with the deepest focus.
Dan simply took a space in the corner and began to practice some defense techniques.
My eyes glanced over each one of them carefully. There was no doubt that each one of their personalities were different and often clashed. It was intriguing to see how such different characters could get along so well.
When I was in training, there was no space to get along. Being at the top meant staying safe so competition dominated over all things and ate any possibility of friendship. Besides, it's not I wanted to get along with trash.
Before deciding to go back to pretending to be asleep, I glanced at Sani and meet her eyes. Not being one to pull away, we stared for a couple of seconds before her lips curled.
She pulled her eyes away and called out to Brye. "Hey Brye, get Snow a book will you? She won't stop staring, I think she's jealous of me for having one."
My eyebrows furrowed. What?
Brye grinned from the top of her bed. "Which one?"
"Got a preference?" Sani asked me.
I shook my head slowly.
"Cool." Brye said as she crawled to the edge of her bed where a small stack of books sat. "I personally would recommend 'Leaving Sollim', it's well written and a very interesting biography written by Lothe."
The name appeared in my mind since the longest, and I looked up. "Leaving Sollim?"
She nodded. "It basically tells the hardships of leaving her home due to an abusive sister who-"
"Is unable to cope with the loss of her late husband." I nodded and said softly. "I remember."
In the last years of the war, while life went on, I stayed holed up at home. Unable to go out despite the war not reaching us yet. So I did what I could do inside. I read.
'Leaving Sollim' was a book my father had recommended with a small smile.
"Lots of children are in these types of situations," he said sadly, "and not everyone can be reached."
"Well how about 'Ocean Thrills'?" Bryce asked. "The ocean is pretty cool. I think I also have a romance book here."
She pulled out a book that held no cover. "So?"
"Give her that one." Sani responded for me. "She needs a little nonsense in her life right now."
I furrowed my eyebrows again. What does that mean?
"Can you catch?"
Can I catch? Pfft.
She tossed The book and I caught it gracefully. I turned the book to look at the cover but it was empty.
"The book must've had a plastic cover, the title should be inside." Bryce said while adjusting herself once more.
"Thank you."
"No problem!"
I scooted to the far end of my bed and rested my back on the wall. My hands slowly touched the cover of the book. It was smooth, as if thousands of hands before me had touched it. The corners were eaten away and was showing its cardboard material. How long has it been since I've held a book? I thought. Can I even read it?
I slowly opened the book, and within the first few pages found out that the title of the book was called 'Love Is?'.I was never really fond of reading romance type books but I remember my mother was.
I remember her sitting by the window, the wind hitting her black curls. How her lashes batted again her cheeks every once in a while. I would call out to her, then my father would, but she would be so deep into that world it was nearly impossible to pull her out.
My hands touched the edge of the page put stopped. My hand began to tremble slightly.
I wanted to laugh. Why are they shaking so much? My hands never shook, I had been trained and said to have the steadiest hands among my peers. I could kill a rat from a fifty-foot distance. Yet now they trembled.
"Is it too lovey for you? I could get a different book."
I was pulled out of my thoughts, and I looked at Brye.
"Should I?" She raised a brow.
"No, this is fine. Thank you."
I went back to the book, shaking all of my thoughts away. Thinking about that now is of no use to me. I flipped the page and came face to face with the first chapter.
"We stood on a cliff. The view before me shook every inch of my core. It was as if a painting had come to life, the shades of dark blue, orange, and pink clashed together as the sun set over the valley. The warmth his hand gave me as he held mine meant everything to me. Little did I know, it was the last time I would hold it ever again."
I narrowed my eyes when I finished the first paragraph. How could the warmth of a hand mean everything? It didn't make sense.
Before I could read further, a small alarm rang throughout the room.
Brye let out a small groan. "It was just about to get good!"
They all collectively began to get ready for bed, as the alarm signified the five minute time left until the lights were turned off.
I simply closed my book, placing it at the far end of my bed and laid down.
A string a good nights rang through the rooms as they settled down in their beds. Finally the lights went off and we were enveloped my darkness.
"Hey Snow?" Lizbeth asked suddenly.
I didn't respond but she continued to talk anyway.
"Do you have any family?"
A moment passed before I finally spoke. "No."
"I see. You're not so different from us then."
Her words echoed through my head. Did she really think that? Could I really have something in common with people who were at ease all the time? How could they go on living like it's fine?
"Welcome home Snow." She mumbled as she dozed off.
I turned to look at the room and the others. While I wasn't completely able to see, I could distinguish their figures under their covers. A small part of me twinged with jealousy with their ability of being able to sleep so well. Could this really become my home?
[You can't.]
His voice echoed for the first time in a while.
[What if that happens again?
Would you be able to live with more innocent blood on your hands?
You can't even think of them before you become scared.]
Stop.
I- I just want to-
[You what? Want to have a place where you can live and be happy? You've already tried that. And look what happened. People died.]
I bit my lip and grabbed my hand.
[I'm sorry, Snowflake. But I don't want you to go through that again.]
He's right. I thought. He's always right.
I couldn't stay for long.
Even if I try to find the spy, another could easily take his place.
Even if I was happy, it wouldn't be worth the risk I would put those around me.
Even if a small part of me wanted to, it would only mean I was selfish.
Who would want to stay in a place like this anyway? I huffed and turned my view back towards the wall. It's crowded, too complicated, and lacks the comfort of the sky.
A strange feeling came over my body, as though I didn't belong on the mattress I laid on. Like the comfort I felt was something I didn't deserve or need.
I sat up, feeling too uncomfortable to continue laying down. Internally sighing, I moved so that my back was against the wall.
It had been awhile since I had proper sleep and I could sense my body was starting to feel heavy. Even so, I couldn't sleep with the sound of people breathing. It forced me to stay awake, even if the environment was safe.
Being able to sleep would be nice.