I woke up with a chill that danced around my body and a erratic heart.
It was just a dream.
I turned my head to look at my surroundings. Several different hospital beds laid next to mine, but the place itself was empty.
My legs felt something shift and my body instinctively jolted upward.
Arianna and the Red-Head Parker, sat on stools while lying their heads by my feet. Each of them sat soundly asleep and hardly stirred at my movement. Slowly, I pushed myself back so that my back would touch the wall.
I stared at the top of their heads.
Flashing images of my dream came into mind.
I shut my eyes.
It could happen again. These stupid feelings of mine could get all of these people killed.
I felt Arianna shift beside me and I opened my eyes. The pockets under her eyes were dark and swollen. I couldn't say the boy had it any better.
I could get them killed, and yet I didn't want to leave. I wanted to hope I could live and not just survive. I wanted to meet people and belong somewhere.
Footsteps echoed from afar and I looked up.
Dr. Simmons gave me a soft smile before running up to my bed. "How do you feel?" He whispered.
"Hot." I muttered.
I knew what had happened. Running what could be dangerous for an ice elementalist, and being perfectly vulnerable for almost a week.
He walked up to me and pressed a big hand to my forehead. I cursed myself for flinching but he didn't seem to notice.
"Hmm. Yes. That fever has yet to leave." He smiled and placed his hand down. "That could be dangerous for you, so you'll just stay here for a couple more days alright?"
I nodded. During these times I wouldn't move from my spot unless absolutely necessary, and while I was here I didn't plan to either.
Because as an ice elementalist, a fever could kill me without hesitation.
"Once your fever is gone, I'll be running a few tests to figure out what caused this to happen."
I remained quiet. I knew what was wrong. My spells had nothing to do with my body nor is it attached to some disease. In fact, it always lied around a specific date as through it waited for me in the shadows. It was all in my head.
"These two haven't spent a moment without you." He nodded his head towards the two dead asleep people beside me. "Quite bothersome really."
He laughed and I stared at them.
They're really weird, I thought.
"You've made some excellent friends."
His words caught me by surprise as I looked up at him.
"What? Do you think they'll stay by anyone's side for three days straight?" He raised an eyebrow.
"Friends," I started slowly, "do that?"
He smiled softly. "And so much more."
Staring at my hands, a weird tingling sensation waved through me like a small fire. It feels- nice? I thought seriously.
"I'd let them sleep a bit more, after all they spent the past three nights wiping your sweat." He grinned and began to walk away.
My attention turned once more to the pair that sleeper through the whole conversation. What a horrible sleeping privilege, I snorted. Seriously, what's wrong with them?
Despite the fever, I have never felt more energized after a spell. My body felt clean and refreshed despite staying in bed for so long. It also didn't feel as heavy as it usually does.
Is it because they took care of me?
The tingling feeling returned.
Did they really consider me as a friend? The both of them?
Although it was true they had never left my side since I got here, I had always figured it was because that's what they did. They seemed like creatures that got along with everyone and spoke to everyone. I was just someone they were helping momentarily.
A serious of conflicting emotions clashed in me. If it were true, a small part of me felt excited. Yet the majority was overwhelmed with anxiety.
I did not deserve friends and yet I wanted friends.
The Red-Head shifted and grumbled. "Ah my back."
My eyes followed his arms as he sat up and stretched. His long arms waved well above his head as he let out a heavy yawn.
His eyes finally opened as he smacked his lips and made eye contact with me.
We stared at each other for a few moments before his jaw dropped and he pointed at me.
Rubbing his eyes, he quickly reached over to Arianna, who sleepily smacked his hand away.
"Damn it Parker I was dreaming!" She snapped and positioned herself once more.
"Arianna." He squeaked.
Unable to ignore his tapping any longer she sat up and roared. "What Parker!"
He turned to my direction and pointed at me with his chin.
I wasn't prepared for her pouncing as she wrapped her hands around me. Parker was a step behind her, as the weight of two people began to smother me.
"We thought you wouldn't wake up again!" Arianna cried.
"Don't scare us like that again!" Parker mumbled behind Arianna.
It wasn't until I felt my chest begin to tighten when I realized I'd been holding my breath.
When they let go I shuddered violently.
"Are you okay?"
They stood up and hovered over me like worried hens.
"I'll call Jack!" Arianna stood up before I could stop her.
My hand fell back down on the bed as the boy continued to fret over me. She just does whatever she pleases.
"Does anything hurt? Are you feeling hot? Should I get a towel for you? Should I get an extra pillow."
I was bombarded by his endless questions, but before that, worry shown through his eyes. His eyebrows were creased and sweat dropped down his face. His curls bounced as he ran to an extra pillow.
Is this what friends do when you're sick? The feeling in my chest tingled again.
Before he could place the pillow behind me, he glanced at my face and froze.
"You-"
I looked at him.
His look of surprise slowly fell and was replaced by a smile. He was grinning ever so widely, lips stretching to show the row of perfect teeth.
I had seen him smile plenty of times before, but I had never really paid attention.
His eyes seemed to shine and his body glowed in a bright light. As though he didn't belong in this world. He could easily be compared to a field of flowers under a blue sky. Or even the glowing moon surrounded by thousands of stars.
He truly is a beautiful person, I thought quietly.
"I'm glad your okay." He spoke with a soft smile. "When Arianna told me that you wouldn't wake up anymore, I was so scared. I thought I wasn't going to see you again."
"You're exaggerating." I muttered.
He smiled again. "Hmm. Maybe. Who knew I would be blessed to see such a beautiful sight after you woke up?"
My eyebrows scrunched. Blessed? What exactly did he see to make him feel that way?
"I'm back!" Arianna shouted from the entrance. "Honestly Snow, you should have told me that you had already meet Jack before I left!"
She was already by my side as she whined. She looked like a puppy, I thought inwardly.
Her eyes looked at my innocently. "Jack told us that before you had fallen sick you must've felt a lot of pain. Why didn't you say something?"
I pursed my lips. It used to hurt, back then when I first had it, the pain was enough to make me scream. It didn't hurt as much anymore.
"If you're in pain," she started, "you should say so."
"Even if the pain is close to nothing." Parker added with a point of his finger.
"Do you understand?" They exclaimed together.
I didn't understand but nodded anyway.
Telling them wouldn't lessen the pain anyway.
They looked at me suspiciously before glancing at each other with determination.
"Parker!"
A high-pitched voice caused all of us to turn to the entrance where the girl with blue eyes and a bubbly personality came running.
I watched as Parker gave her a grin.
So he smiled so beautifully all the time? Do people smile like that all the time?
"Hey Lucky."
She grinned while keeping her sight in him. "Jack sent me so you could go rest and eat properly. Oh! Arianna too of course!"
Arianna's narrowed as she gave the girl a tight smile. "That's okay, I'll stay. Parker you go eat."
He frowned. "Yeah right, and leave Snow with you? No way."
I felt a hostile glare come from the girl before it was wiped away in an instant. What is wrong with her?
"Parker if you don't eat properly then-"
"If Arianna stays then I stay." He huffed stubbornly while crossing his arms like a child.
The girl gave a worried expression. "What should I do? The both of you haven't eaten properly."
"Arianna." I spoke quietly and looked at Arianna. "I'll be fine."
"But-"
"Go eat." I ordered firmly.
She grumbled before slumping her arms in defeat.
"Why don't you tell me to go eat?" Parker whined. "Be concerned for me too!"
I stared at him. While I appreciated his pointless act of staying next to me, I wasn't comfortable enough to speak to him properly.
Arianna grabbed him by the shoulder and began to drag him away. "Come on Carrots."
I watched as they walked away, chatting amongst themselves as they did.
I felt the side of my head being pricked by a hard stare. Reluctantly, my head turned to face the girl.
She seems to want to say something, I thought, or maybe she's just feeling constipated.
"Stop clinging to him!" She blurted suddenly with red cheeks.
I couldn't help but blink at her.
Clinging? What did that mean? I know clinging is when you hold on to something tightly. How can you cling to a person though? Is it never letting go? How would that be possible? Would I follow them in the restroom as well?
"What- what do you mean?" I hesitated to ask but my curiosity was too strong.
She clenched her hands. "You're following him everywhere! He's not yours for you to cling to him!"
I blinked again. Me? Following him?
Is she feeling okay?
At this point, I didn't know how to respond. I just sat there staring at her like a gaping fish.
She looked down at her hands. Frustration and anger colored her face and eyes. "I- I don't understand. He's only friends with two people. That's it. He keeps everyone else at a distance and is nice to everyone! Why is he- you. Why not me?"
I didn't understand what she was going on about, but I realized she was close to tears.
Becoming flustered, I looked for a source of help anywhere.
Next to my bed was a pile of cheap tissue, and I didn't hesitate to grab as many as I could.
I reached over to her, handing her the tissue gently.
She sniffed, hesitating before taking the tissue slowly from my hands.
I felt a sense of relief when she blew her nose violently.
"You're weird." She sniffled and looked up at me. "You know, when everyone calls you dangerous and an ice monster he always defends you. I didn't understand why but I think I do now. You're really nice."
Defends? As in protect? Why would he do that?
"I'm sorry." She apologized quietly. "It's just that I love him. I love him with all my heart, so seeing him with you really hurts."
My eyes widened. I thought love only hurt when you lose someone. It also hurts even when they're alive? What's the point of loving someone then? How come I've never felt that way?
"It's silly." She laughed sadly.
No, it's terrifying.
"Anyway," she cleared her throat and straightened herself, "I won't let you have him. I'll fight for him. Fair and square of course!"
My eyebrows furrowed. Fight for who?
"So be prepared!" She warned with a smile.
I've never been so confused in my life. What is happening?
"Oh!" She began again. "I just realized I never introduced myself, although I'm pretty sure Parker had already!"
He has not.
"My name is Lucky Garnnet. It's very nice to meet you!" She grinned and held out a hand.
I clasped my hands together uncomfortably.
She saw me do so and lowered her hand. "And your name?"
"Snow." I said quietly, attempting to be polite.
Her eyes softened with her smile. "Snow. You know I've never touched snow before. I was always a sickly child, so going outside when it was too cold was bad for me. I only saw it out the window."
My hand unconsciously reached for the item around my neck.
"I hear it's really soft, and even if it's cold you're too excited to feel it!" She laughed.
It was.
The memory of the last snowfall filled my mind.
The way it gracefully fell from the sky and blanketed every inch of land. It caused the children to stop and play, and the others to admire the view.
Snow was beautiful.
It was death.
A gentle fall would turn into something horrifying. Strong enough to cause the weak to tumble and fall. It became a blizzard that blinded our view and blocked our paths. Children would disappear from their parent's sights. It brought screaming terror and uncertainty.
Right behind the beautiful snow came destruction and devastation.
That beautiful white snow would become stained with the color red.
My hand began to tremble.
If it came again, we would all-
"Are you okay?"
I blinked out of my thoughts and saw Lucky standing over me with concern.
"Do you need me to get Jack?"
I quickly shook my head. "I'm fine."
She glanced at my hands which caused me to realize my hands were shaking violently. Acting quickly, I crawled under the sheets to make it seem like I was cold.
"I'll bring you another blanket."
I attempted to calm myself as I breathed as quietly as I could.
It won't come if I'm careful enough, I breathed. I'll be more careful this time.
I won't kill anyone. Not again.