Even though the sun isn't visible, a layer of heat beats down that assures me it's there without a single cloud to block it. I pull off and tie the hoodie around my waist, letting my bare arms breathe.
It's rarely this warm here but today is an exception, it's the kind of weather where you want to go swimming. Not because it's actually warm enough to, but because the temperature is finally starting to get better after a long winter.
So maybe that's why I insisted on leaving the house today. After... the thing that happened two days ago, none of us have done much. We all kept our distance from each other, stuck in our own heads and trying to repress the moment... that happened.
I convinced Marcus and Lola to go out exploring with me. I've been lonely, and even though I was perfectly fine without company, in fact, I sought it out to try and shake off the idea of what happened two days ago. When I woke up and went outside, I just had the feeling today would be the day to do something.
I convinced Lola and Marcus to go to a high school with me. Why? I found one ages ago and thought that normalcy of any kind would be nice. Besides, exploring is awesome.
So here we are now, in front of the frosted glass door of a school. Lola wields wooden baseball bat over her head and slams it against the glass. The bits of glass scatter across the asphalt, brushing against the soles of our shoes.
"I see why vandals do this so much, way more fun than it looks," She says with a flame in her eyes that has been reduced to jus the light of a match. Marcus doesn't seem to notice, but I do.
"Don't get too used to this, when we get back home you've gotta be a law abiding citizen again."
Lips pressed together in a straight line, she shoots me a look but instead of saying anything, ducks under metal divider to step through the door.
Marcus follows closely behind Lola, and I go through the slowest, a pointed piece of glass scratching the back of my neck.
Once inside we find ourselves in a lunchroom. Pretty odd to have a door that leads straight to a lunch-room but whatever, its more interesting than just a plain hallway.
But something is strange about the place. I'm not talking about the mildew smell or even the feeling that people should be crowing around at he tables, but what's here in their place.
Marcus approaches a pile of ash on the ground, "Huh," he says blatantly.
Lola crouches down next to Marcus and their shoulders bump together. They smile at each-other flirtily.
"Think it's from a body?" Lola says.
I was lying when I said that we've all been keeping our distance, because that isn't completely true. Lola and Marcus have been together a bunch, while Nayan and I held true to that statement. I've seen Lola and guys together like this before at school--somewhat ironic that I'm taking notice to it at another school.
I needlessly readjust my short hair behind my ears and keep my distance as I look at the mysterious pile, "Really Lola? What a morbid first guess."
"Well, I mean," Marcus narrows in on the ashes, "If we can die twice maybe we die differently."
Lola laughs under her breath, "You guys have the lamest superpower. You guys couldn't have the ability to fly, or... I don't know... make stuff explode with your mind!"
"I don't think turning into ash when you die is much of a superpower," I say.
"Well, still," Lola shrugs, "You guys are technically immortal, I think I'd rather fly."
Wait, the ash thing. I shoot back up from my crouched position, so quick that I almost fall back.
"Maurice!" They both seem to freeze up when I say his name, but the bounce in my step hinders my ability to care, "Did you guys see ashes? Maybe he didn't die!"
They look at each other, not with the same lust as I've seen them with countless times now. The look of having to deliver crushing news. I've seen it more often in parents telling their kids they need braces or something like that, it annoys me that they're the ones giving me this look.
But couldn't I be right?
Lola's breathes grow ragged, she has a hard time looking at me in the eye, "He's dead, Cass. Any ashes that were there have already blown away."
"Maybe they-"
Her voice begins to raise, "He's dead, Cassie. Drop it."
No, I'm not going to drop it! He may have been a bit threatening and not the greatest human being, but he didn't deserve to die. They wouldn't just kill him like that, drag him out of his house and pull the trigger like nothing happened!
"They wouldn't just-"
Marcus takes a step back with hands shoved in his pockets.
"No!" Her voice grows pained, "You heard he gunshot just as much as I did! You heard him stop screaming too! He's dead."
She storms off down a hall, leaving Marcus and I in her echoing steps.
I don't race off to follow her, and Marcus looks like he's considering it but he ultimately decides to stay.
"I'm sorry," I mumble.
I'm not even sure why I say it, siblings have disagreements all the time. He's stuck living with two sisters who, regardless of how close they are, fight often. It's something that he'll have to get used to.
"For what?"
I sigh and sit down at one of the dusty tables, "I don't know. You just looked so uncomfortable."
"I have a brother at home, Franco. Twins actually. He always got so mad when I tried to see the bright side in anything, really," He slumps over a bit, "Our Papa would always get so mad about it, said I needed to toughen up and accept the truth."
I glare at him, he isn't taking my side, he's proving Lola's, "That's not what this is."
"I didn't finish," he cuts in.
I grit my teeth together but keep listening.
"Franco wasn't always right. Sometimes the bright side came through in the end, good would prevail," He swipes at the dust on the table, it doesn't fade, "But sometimes it didn't. I always got an annoying I told you so, and life went on. But It's not the same here. I don't want to think they would kill Maurice either, but we don't get to be naïve anymore."
Is it really that crazy to think that maybe, just maybe, the fifth person I've seen in the last six months who hasn't seriously attempted to kill me, might not be dead?
"It's not being naïve, Marcus," I say quietly, "And aren't you supposed to be the happy one? Aren't you supposed to be in denial too?"
He darts his head around to the hallway where Lola went, but quickly turns back to me.
He looks up, "Sometimes you can see the bad and still be happy."
I don't say anything, I have nothing to say.
With this he stands up wordlessly and walks down the hallway Lola went down. I can't help but feel spite watching him find Lola. That should be my job, not his.
It's probably for the better anyway. I doubt Lola would want to see me unless it's to tell her she's right. Either that or apologize maybe. But I don't think I'm the right person to go talk to her anyways, people who storm off do it for attention or because they want to be alone.
My sister is sociable and all, but she isn't one to go around striving for attention. So if she want's to be alone, it's for the same reason (most of us) have been keeping our distance the last couple days.
She's probably right--they both are. I need to start seeing the world for what it really is and stop trying to see that somehow, in some way, the EAA isn't what they seem to be.
Maurice was right. I don't know why, and it doesn't matter why they showed mercy the first time. They won't do it again, and that's why we can't stay here any longer.
***
Marcus is a peacekeeper. I swear every time Lola and I get into a squabble(which I think she's been trying to avoid for him) he shows up out of nowhere to be like a mediator. Bringing light to both of our reasons until Lola apologizes(again, more or less for Marcus' sake), or we get tired of it and just go about our lives as if it didn't happen.
Marcus leans forward over the table, like he's waiting to say something. Even though Lola is just being competitive like a normal board game of... I think sorry. Regardless of what it's actually called, we play the game like sorry.
I bounce my green triangle piece eight spaces forward and when I get to Lola's yellow one she eyes me with a side smile.
"Don't do it, bitch."
I knock her piece off to the side with a smirk and put it back in the yellow circle, "I'm soooo sorry."
She huffs overdramatically, "Expect revenge."
Marcus glances between the two of us, debating if he should step in. Which is absolutely stupid because this is a board game and you're supposed to be competitive.
She nudges Marcus' leg with the side of her knee, "Your turn, and don't be like Cassie."
He flips over a card on the center of the board and when he sees the number he smiles and begins bouncing his piece around the perimeter of the board. The blue triangle lands right next to Lola's piece at the other side of the board from mine.
"Your lucky, and as a bonus our pawns get to be next to each other."
She adjusts her head enough where a shock of blonde hair blocks her red cheeks from Marcus.
There's a reason friend lives and family lives are typically separate, so siblings don't have to choose between aweing and gaging in situations like this. Seeing my sister like this diffidently doesn't improve my opinion on Marcus.
"I'll be right back," she says, already standing up and on her way out of the room.
Once she is up the stairs enough to be out of view Marcus leans forwards and drops his voice to a whisper, "Did I do something wrong?"
I snort, not bothering to match his whisper, "No, your fine. She probably had to use the bathroom or something."
He leans back on the futon, and despite my reassurance this doesn't seem to have resolved his concern over my sister. He watches the stairs a moment and then turns back to me, "Was I being too pushy? Should I have just left it with a 'you're lucky'?"
I stifle a burst of laughter, I think this is one of the last conversations I expected to have with Marcus but alright. Though weirdly enough I can't see myself here with Lola either.
"No, Marcus. You weren't being too pushy, she was blushing."
His face lights up, "Really?"
I watch the nine triangle shaped pawns on the board, "Yeah, she looked like a cross between a tomato and a raspberry."
"Does she like me?"
I cross my arms over my lap, it's not that I don't want them to be together, I actually think they'd be cute together. But I do have some problems with... I don't really know. Something about this just doesn't feel right.
"Don't tell her I told you this cause she didn't flat out tell me--and I think she'd kill me, but I'm like ninety-nine percent sure she likes you."
"So you think I have a chance with her?"
I narrow my eyes at him, "Probably, but lets not talk about this anymore. Aren't you supposed to talk with guys about this stuff?"
He holds his hands out, gesturing to the room with only two people, "I don't see Nayan here, and besides, I think I can safely assume you know more about your sister."
I open my mouth to say something but before I can Lola is walking back into the room and I fall silent. And the game continues.