Living as a teenage girl wasn't easy. Was life even easy at all? Well...not really. Not when you don't seem to fit at all. I'm not saying that I'm living a hard life, it's just that I can't really seem to know where I'm going and that's what frustrates me. I guess all my life, I've wanted my life to be perfect just the way you see it in movies. Don't you feel it too? The way you want to have a happy ending just like the characters in the story? Well if you haven't, I definitely have. I can't say I've felt it forever but definitely now. I just want to have someone there for me when things go wrong. I want someone to take care of me when I'm sick. I want someone to grow old with me to watch the future grow before us.

I guess that was all just a silly thought. Happy endings don't exist in the world. All we could do is dream, dream that maybe one day we'll have someone by our side. I lay down on the soft grass, staring at the blue sky. It was quite warm today, the autumn breeze was blowing in the air keeping the temperature neutral. What a normal day in my life it was. I liked to spend the afternoon outside, a little time to myself. I lay down by the same tree every fall afternoon reading a book to keep my worries away. I didn't really have much friends to spend my day with, after all I wasn't much of a talker. I sat up, picking up my book to start reading again. I could hear the laughter of children and the soft rustle of leaves around me. I wish life was this calm but we have to accept reality, it isn't anything like this at all.

This tree was my only comfort I ever have in my life. After all, I don't have friends and I'm not quite close to my family either. I guess you could call me an overthinker, I think too much about my situations. That's what makes me a pessimist. I might be different towards others and people don't definitely know the real me. The one that's hurting inside. The one who's longing for a reason to live but that's impossible to find. I want to run away from life, to live the life I want, to be successful. But that doesn't come without hard work, does it? No it doesn't.