"Are you fucking insane?" or "I can't believe you want to do this!". Those two sentences were what I expected to hear from Ayda when I revealed the details of my plan to her. But what I heard was "Well, since you think that has a chance to work, let's do it!" instead.
And here she was now, half bowing and half losing her balance caused by a sudden desire to stop from her initial mad rush. With my body bent in a similarly comical position, we could only hope that the wizard that we chanced upon would at least find it amusing, and hopefully interesting to learn just what the fuck was wrong with our heads.
"What the fuck is wrong with your heads? What witches? Are they chasing you?"
Still baffled by the currently occurring situation, the middle-aged man looked at the two of us as if we were some kind of mental cases. But once his eyes landed on Ayda, his pupils suddenly widened as he took a step back.
"Sir, before you say anything, I know. I know that she seems to be a witch… but in reality, she is a sleeper agent."
I was risking here greatly. But I didn't really have much choice regarding the vocabulary here. While I could take my time to explain what a sleeper agent is in words that anyone would understand, it would take time. And time was the most essential bit in the ongoing event.
"Wait a second… What?!"
Still unable to make the ins or outs of the situation, the wizard looked at me with the hope of receiving some answers. And I was happy to oblige.
"Sir, she saved me just before those damned witches turned me into a heretic like the rest of them. It's only her doing that saved me from that disastrous fate. But for some reasons, those witches keep chasing us. Maybe it's for the vengeance, maybe they don't want to lose face… Or maybe I have something of a potential to become a somewhat strong one amongst their ranks… But I don't want to spoil my blood with the markings of the devil!"
Before this entire action, I took an entire day worth of lecture from Ayda of all the slurs that wizard used to condemn the witches. In their attempt to establish wizardry as the sole way of using magic, they unknowingly gave me a lot of ammunition to use against one of their own right now.
"Wait, but how could the witch help you out to escape from other witches? What the heck is actually going on here?!"
I could only hope that the sound of my teeth clanging when I realised with frustration that the man actually didn't know the meaning of 'sleeper agent' phrase didn't reach that man's ears. Thankfully, Ayda was just as quick-witted as she was per usual.
"Sir, back in the days, for me, the rescue party… came too late. While they managed to save me from the brainwashing of those spawns of the devils, it was too late to save my soul…"
Shaking her head with a worry so genuine that for a moment I managed to forget that she was an actually fully-fledged witch, Ayda continued to convince the wizard with her story.
"In order to save people like me, I decided to join the witches and lay in wait for a strong candidate. Given how the thing that witches lack the most are the numbers, as soon as I noticed this man, I had no other choice but to do everything in my power to save him from the fate that befell me."
Falling on her knees, Ayda didn't care at all for the crowd that already managed to gather around. After all, the more people, the better.
"Sir, for some reason, those damned witches want to turn me into one of them. And I only know of one way to save my soul from that gutter."
By sneakily hitting myself in my crotch, I managed to produce real tears from my ears, adding yet another layer of how genuine my act was. After all, who could expect that those tears of desperation were actually fake?
"I think I know what you mean. If you become a wizard…"
Seeing that the man managed to catch on, I had to use all my willpower to not smile.
"Yes, even the witches won't dare to turn me into that monstrosity from the legends. As much as they hate all the good in the world, that's the one thing they actually do fear."
Nodding my head to confirm the wizard's guess, I was already shaking my own hand in my mind. If this man already started guessing, then it meant he swallowed our bait all the way to his stomach and was now asking for more.
People are haughty. If you ask anyone on the street, they will admit that the majority of humanity is stupid, with them holding the honourary place in that better part of the race. This was simply how humans perceived the world. Our judgment always stems from the fact that we are the only ones feeling what we feel and seeing what we see, making us think that it is our perspective that is always right and the best. That's why, all I had to do, was lead the wizard to the reasoning he just used and then use all my might to reinforce it!
"If that's the case, then there is no time."
With the added pressure from the crowd, the man didn't dare to dawdle on the spot. After all, outside of the potential threat of the witches' chasing after us, he would be greatly punished if he dared to uproot the common opinion of the wizards by refusing to help right now.
"You have my thanks, young lady. I will make sure your dedication won't be forgotten."
Turning his head to Ayda as he moved closer to me, the wizard nodded his head with respect to my girl. Huh, my girl? Since when I started to consider her to be mine?
While I could ask this question to myself, I was actually pretty aware of its answer. While it took me a while to notice it, I think my attachment to this fluffy piece of cuddling monster started when she called me her hero. As stupid and childish at it sounded now, when I actually thought about it…
But I didn't have the time to think about it. With the wizard finally approaching me and placing his hand on my head, the most important part of my entire plan was about to reach its completion.
"Master, please do guide me away from the treacherous path of those damned witches…"
Even with how it was all nothing but an act, it was still a strange feeling to keep insulting the witches with one of them doing the same right beside me.
"Here, it's done."
Before I could even feel anything, the wizard already raised his hand from my head.
"Eh?"