Mom and Mrs. Stan came in to make sure I was comfortable and even though I didn't need help, Gwen, on my brother's insistence came to assist me with a shower.
I am always thankful for help with washing my hair, so in spite of being reluctant for any assistance, I welcome it and I welcomed Gwen.
"Have you seen Logan?" I asked Gwen, hesitantly because even though I have started trusting her, I am cautious, but Logan is refusing to accept her change or in my opinion, her eye opener.
Shaking her head, "no I haven't, seen him between the kitchen and here." She says, without meeting my eyes as I expected.
I am so fed up of this back and forth between Logan and I, with one good day problem free and two weeks of incidents that keeps him away.
Without allowing her to see how I felt, I took my shower and after helping me comb my hair, I locked my doors when Gwen left informing her of my desire to have a long nap, since it was just after lunch.
I also knew she would convey my message.
Frowning at me, Gwen eventually left and I secured the front and back doors behind me to have a deep sleep, Logan free.
After what seems like hours, I finally fell asleep in the middle of going over everything I heard between Logan and his mom this morning, but unable to reach any conclusion because no one's saying anything and Logan is still not here, as usual.
Maybe he's gone back to his grandfather, was my last thought before losing consciousness.
I woke up with a jolt after hearing a pounding on my door and when I heard Logan's voice, I didn't bother to answer, but took my time in getting to the inside door.
When I finally got to the door, I opened it to see my angry husband facing me.
Scuffing, I move to spin around, but he grabbed my arm, pulling me backwards towards him.
I almost fell over, if Logan's wasn't holding me, but I jerked my back causing instant pain.
My eyes started filling up, but I tried to get out of his arm without allowing him to see my pain.
"I was just about to break the door down!" He bellowed at me.
I've never been stubborn, but today seems like a good day to start, since being a nice, forgiving girl isn't working.
Facing him with my eyes on his chest, which is partially visible because of the few buttons of his shirt, which came undone or which he left undone.
"I figured you'd probably return to your grandfather, like earlier." I said, softly, even though Logan was still angry, which was evident as he fought to control his breathing.
Logan loosened his hold on my arm, grabbing me now on both my upper arm, but not tightly.
"Why do we do this every time we don't understand each other's moves or if we don't talk?" Logan asked, the angry tone of his voice, now lowered.
Lifting my eyes to meet his, "I'm always here" I retorted dryly.
"And I'm not!" he says, gently moving me aside and walking into the room, undressing as he makes his way to the bathroom.
While Logan showered, I debated about waiting on him or leaving him alone, which seems to be his thing now.
If I remain and he still doesn't explain this morning, then we're in the same position as when I woke up.
Darn, my wheelchair is still somewhere outside and I'm in no position to go looking for it.
The bathroom door opened and my husband walked out with water dripping from his head down his body, clad in a blue towel wrapped on his hip line.
I couldn't help staring at his physique.
How could a guy who looks this appealing be happy with someone who has no appeal, whatsoever.
Afraid of being caught staring, I looked away before Logan catches me gaping at his half naked body.
Logan returned, fully clothed in a black dress jeans and a black long sleeves dress shirt, wiping his wet hair with the towel he was wrapped in earlier.
My heart dropped!
He was leaving again, but I won't ask where or why anymore.
Staring at my hands that's now clasped on my laps, already planning to curl up and fall asleep again.
With my eyes lowered, I notice Logan's black Nike facing me, but I didn't look up and he didn't try to speak, either.
Finally he turned on his heel and walkout.
"You can lock the door." He says, shutting the door behind him, before I could even look up.
The tears silently started rolling down my cheeks while I kept my eyes glued on the close bedroom door.
He's as good as told me, he isn't returning tonight and it's my fault.
I curled up into a ball crying myself to sleep, with the worst case scenarios playing in my head and the most fearful one being, would Logan eventually cheat on me?
By the time I arose from my second nap, it was dark on the inside and the outside.
I trotted off to the washroom to refresh myself, before raiding the refrigerator.
I threw Logan's dirty clothes that was on the floor, which was a task because the pain from earlier is still there.
The kitchen was dim and quite, but even though I wasn't hungry, I needed to eat, for my baby.
My eyes opened wide when the clock on the wall read three fifteen.
It's already morning and Logan isn't here, as usual.
Mrs. Stan normally leaves my dinner in a container and after pushing and tugging containers, I finally found one with my name in it.
I pulled off the cover placing the container into the microwave leaning at the counter while I wait for it to heat up.
"You've got to stop doing this!"