I hate the way I had to leave Jamie, but I had no other choice knowing Jamie and my mom's safety is my number one priority.
Dad finally understands that, but what he refuses to understand is the betrayal I still feel with the lies mom fed me. Lies that has been defining my life since I was seventeen.
I blamed myself for Douglar's death. A murder that has haunted me for years. A murder I still have nightmares about. When I am trying murder cases, I often felt hypocritical for condemning a murderer when I am no different.
And after all this time, Douglar has been alive and well, choosing to only resurface now and to resurface in my life, now just when I thought things couldn't get,any worse.
"Hey man, you know that when Jamie awakes and you're still not home, she's going to be upset, right?" Cam says, something I already know and something I already anticipated.
Tonight's been a difficult one, having to deal with Angela Lawrence, whose extremely tough but even I know she's breakable and I intend to break her if she doesn't give me the names of the persons her family and my grandfather's are linked to.
"I'm hungry and exhausted" I admitted to Cam, "my mind is not at ease and I just can't relax, when Jamie and I are at odds." I continued confessing to Cam.
"You know I'm not Catholic right?" Cam says reminding me that he is an atheist and have been so since his stint overseas. "So confessing to me won't make anything right in your life." Cam chuckles dryly.
Cam admitted that the things he saw and the innocent lives that were lost as our countries fought in a war to bring peace, has made him cynical.
Chuckling, "hmm, well that takes you out of the running as Godfather to my kid," I responded, laughing out loud at the shocked expression on his face.
Briefly taking his eye of the road, "I was a contender?" He asks in surprise.
"Well, I don't know who Jamie had in mind, but she seems to like you more than she does Justin sometimes, so I just assumed, you know." I frowned wondering when did Jamie and Justin get at odds with each other, since they started off as good friends.
"You know, now that I think about it, Jamie and Justin use to get along really well, but something changed or maybe it's her pregnancy, because she's always disagreeing with him and vice versa." I told Can, bit I was also speaking to myself.
Chuckling, "ah, the complications of having a large family." Cam commented.
Shaking my head, as I laid back slightly on the seat, "man just one healthy kid with a healthy wife, whose pain fee, is all I want right now." I admitted. "I would look at Jamie, eating up her pain like she did when I left earlier and she won't say anything, but she's being strong for me, for our baby." I continued, wiping my eyes that suddenly started stinging.
"I watch her sleep and keep begging God to keep her safe. I used to think that I am paying my dues for killing Douglar, but now, I wonder what I am paying for?" I kept sharing with the Atheist who isn't interest in my woes.
I took a quick glimpse at the time and yawned when I saw it was almost four in the morning, "whose cooking breakfast?" I asked Cam and his eyes met Bob in the rearview mirror, with a smirk.
"There's a case of Ramen soup in the cupboard" Bob chuckles and leaned back against the backrest closing his eyes.
Scuffing, "f**k Ramen" Cam mocks, "let me give Jamie a call." Cam says pulling out his phone and with a hand on the wheel, he starts scrolling through his phone for Jamie's number.
"If she's awake I said," even though I know she's wide awake.
"Wanna bet she's awake?" Cam was saying with the phone against his ear.
"Good morning, Mrs. Daniels" Cam greeted Jamie and since the phone wasn't on speaker, I didn't hear her response.
Like a high school kid, I made a grab for the phone but Cam swerved as he tried to hold unto the phone, causing Bob to bang his head against the side of the door.
"F**k man," Bob yelps, slapping Cam behind his head.
"Bob fell asleep and banged his head against the door" Cam chuckles as he continues to chat with Jamie.
"Yeah, yeah, we're on our way home, maybe we could got some breakfast?" Cam asks with a hopeful tone.
"They are?" Cam responds to whatever Jamie said to him in surprise, then pause to listen to whatever Jamie was saying to him.
"Great, great, thank you. See you soon." Cam says hanging up, with a board smile on his face,
Watching the smile on Cam's face angered me a bit, "should I be worried about that smile on your face?"
i snapped at him.
Chuckling some more, "well you would also be happy, because Jerome and Justin's also awake and doing breakfast, while Bob here" Cam points over his shoulder, will have Ramen." Cam laughs out even though he got another slap behind his head from Bob.
By the time we drove into the compound, dawn could also be seen over the horizon and the first thing on my mind was a shower before food, although I am starving but facing Jamie in front of everyone around is not something I anticipate right now.
As the vehicle stopped at the side of the cabin, I walked around the back to our bedroom, to start with a shower and to avoid the gang in kitchen until I have freshen up.
To my surprise my wife was lying on the bed, her eyes on the back door.
"Hey," I said, unbuttoning my shirt walking towards the bed,
She tries to sit up as I approached the bed.
Frowning, because I was expecting for her to be in the kitchen, "hiding?" I raised my eyebrows wondering why she's in here.
"Tilting her head, she gives me a mocking smile, "hiding?" She throws back at me and I had to chuckle at her response.
"Great minds think alike" I reminded her.