Today it's a Thursday afternoon midsummer 2009. My husband Elijah has now gone on tour to paris with his group Beckoning Blin Pop. I decided this time not to go with him. We had certain money worries this time. I need to stay at home to pay the house bills and look after Diamond as well as my goldfish. I just don't want to be traveling around all the time. I not cut out to travel around all the time as it makes me very tired. As a child I suffered from travel sickness.
Were not joined at the hip anyway. Sometimes Elijah does go traveling to places by himself with his group. He doesn't have to take me everywhere.
Elijah hasn't called or texted me like he usually does. Perhaps he's fixed in his work as he's always been known as a perfectionist. I am currently taking reading for people online an my own personel website in my own spare time.
I looked at myself in the mirror to apply my mascara and tears started running.
I don't know why I'm getting these today. It's just life.
I was on my way out to the shops and feeling glum.
Maybe Elijah is Paris now missing me. Haven't even heard a word from him today. Maybe I'll here from him later.
The night soon came and I was back at home. This is silly now, I thought on. But its Elijah. What should I expect.
Later in the night I had the dreaded a phone call from Elijah's friend and tour manager Hardeep Greaves.
Hardeep sounded broken and distraught.
'It's about Elijah' 'Lucy' 'Your going to find out anyway'
'What about Elijah?' I asked.
'He was looking after are white tour van till this morning' He was in a crash on the road' He was taken to hospital and pronounced dead at 11.30 this morning'
I just laughed. 'Your kidding me right?'
Hardeep's voice was upset. 'I wouldn't joke about something like that' 'I've confirmed it was him Lucy'
I hung up not knowing what to think.
I knew she hadn't heard from Elijah at all, all day and started to get anxious.
I sat on the sofa to check out the news on my tv and nothing was mentioned. I switched off my tv and stood still and I thought for a moment.
I'll find out he is still alive tomorrow and the whole thing had been a mistake. They must have identified another guy matching Elijah's description. 'The whole think is a mistake.
I tensely headed up to her bedroom and got out my phone to call Elijah. The phone rang and their was no answer. I laughed it off in disbelief and then anxiously hung up.
My husbands dead? she thought. 'Is this some kind of sick twisted joke? 'It's not true!' 'I can feel it!'
Diamond sat on the rug looking at me giving a little wail. I looked at Diamond and then I got ready for bed to sleep.
It was the next morning on a Friday I was called by his family and was told the news. I was in shock and disbelief.
The coroner also visited me in my home that morning. He told me he came around the day before but she was out.
Friday night came I was in my bedroom. I didn't know how to act and was overwhelmed. I would watch Elijah's music video's of him for the rest of the night. I couldn't come to terms with what happened.
Midnight came, I sat on the bed. I'm on my own now. I thought. Elijah's not here. It's just wrong. It's not even his time. All I can think about is his beautiful smile. I lay on the bed and gazed up at the ceiling.
Elijah was killed driving a white tour van in Paris. I was in a daze. I couldn't even cry.
It hadn't hit me untill a week later, I screamed and cried and felt his presence. I was definitely in the darkness. This is the beginning of the Darkness and Light...