I frown as soon as my fingertips touch the cool metal of the door knob. I really wish I didn't have to come home but my family needs me, plus I couldn't stay around now that Adriano knows. I roll my eyes at myself.
I had one more year left, I went through all these years safe and then one thing after another I meet the greatest guys in the span of a week.
I sigh, shaking my head before going inside. If only it were earlier than maybe I'd be better. Oh, well, doesn't matter now. Now I just need to keep Kahlil from finding out...
Kahlil.
After locking the house door, I lean my head on it. I close my eyes as my brows furrow. That same warmth in my chest squeezes my heart so tight I almost think it stops. Then I'm tricked when my palm touches my pounding chest.
God, that fucking boy.
His face paints itself on my eyelids, my favorite expression: Playful—bright eyes shine through the darkest of depressions, corners of lips curl into a beautiful masterpiece displaying their fanciest, whitest pearls before the richest voice escapes; curing the deaf.
I open my eyes, shaking my head. No, this isn't.. can't be. Maybe I'm just addicted to his body, it's possible. Maybe I'm just tricking myself 'cause I know he's something I can't have.
I nod rapidly as I hurry to my room. Yeah, that's it, he's just some forbidden fruit. I shall not bite.
I quickly shut my door then lean against it. Looking forward, I find myself feeling exhausted as soon as I catch sight of my comfortable bed.
After a sigh, I move towards my only cuddle and comfort buddy. It's time I retire.
⚀ ⚀ ⚀ ⚀
Kahlil Collins
"You don't really want me." He feels as if a fist clenches around his heart as those words fall from her kissable lips. He furrows his eyebrows.
What the hell is she talking about?
He wants her so bad his heart, head and... dick aches..
though I can't tell her that.
"Why?" Her simple yet beautiful eyes fall to the ground as they get covered by her bangs. His gaze follows the glasses, which slowly slip down her cute little nose. He resists the urge to push them back up so he can see that adorable surprise and embarrassed expression of hers.
"I can't tell you, I'm just not good enough for you." She pushes her glasses up with her sleeve covered knuckle. Kahlil notices some discoloration in the skin which peeks out. He bunches his fists, the anger eating at him. He's not usually one of those violent, short-tempered types but,
this woman makes me crazy.
"What type of shit did I do for you to put me on that pedestal?" She tries to hide it but he knows she's affected by his use of cussing.
Not good enough, please, you're fucking amazing.
She shakes her head, her brown locks swaying around her innocent face.
What I wouldn't do to kiss that face.
"You're sweet, caring, and funny... while I'm," her expression goes gloomy causing his emotions to go haywire.
I hate seeing her like this.
"A liar." He scrunches his brows in confusion.
What?
"Nevaeh, you're not making any sense." She wraps the robe tighter around her otherwise bare body. Despite her perfectly tamed hair, he can tell she just woke up.
Why else would her Sammy answer the door?
Kahlil subconsciously licks his lips as he does a subtle once over.
I bet she sleeps in her underwear.
His eyes flickers to her arms as they cross over her chest and tighten around each other.
Or better yet, naked.
Crazy, she has way more body than he thought. Maybe 'cause she dresses like a nun at school.
He blinks back to reality, and focus on her face. She sighs, completely oblivious to being eye-raped just seconds ago.
"I don't want to stand out here, let's go in." He nods, following her inside her house. They pass by the living room and down a hall. He glances at the signs on the closed doors. The signs have names and drawings of faces next to the names.
She must have a lot more siblings than Sammy.
She stops causing him to move his attention towards her. Her cheeks are tinted a cute red. Kahlil looks at the sign on the door they stopped at.
Nevaeh.
It's also accompanied with a drawing of a girl with grey eyes and black hair. The picture was obviously made by a kid though that's not what he focuses on.
"Nev-"
"It's still kinda early so we have to be quiet." With a shaky hand, she opens her door. Once they walk through, she closes them in then leans against the door with her hands between her butt and the wood. He waits patiently for Nevaeh to speak.
"I'm not as innocent as you think I am." He crosses his arms with a raised eyebrow. She glances at him from under her bangs then catches her sliding spectacles.
"I-I've been," she closes her eyes, release air through her nose. The nostrils flare in an adorable manner.
"Around." His eyebrows furrow.
What does- I don't understand.
"Huh?" She sighs, refusing to meet his gaze.
"I sleep around," she brushes her bangs away.
"Fuck, basically, on a daily basis." The words fall from her mouth as if she just told him what she ate for lunch today. Kahlil stays completely silent.
"Leon's seen me half naked and I've even had sex with... Adriano," she blushes. 'Multiple times.' Her voice lowers but not enough to be inaudible, unfortunately. She uncovers her hands to display her bruises.
"Plus I'm extremely violent, get into fights with all types of people." Nevaeh's face goes stiff as she hides her hands in her armpits.
"My body's been used so many times, in so many ways that it can't possibly be sacre to anyone." She lowers her gaze. 'Even me.' He's numb at this point. This information kills him, but not because she lied. He stares at her sadden expression. But because..
she doesn't believe she's worth anything.
It breaks and angers him all at the same time. So without thinking, he picks her up and drop her on her bed. She lands with her arms flat on either side of her, resting on her soft bed. Her hair falls from her ear display a cartilage piercing.
It makes her more real and not just the Lil' goodie who walks our school halls.
His eyes lower. The tie on her robe loosened too, causing collarbones to show. They're decorated in fading bruises:
hickeys.
He hovers over her as his emotion rages through him. Their eyes meet and he freezes. Her eyes are shocked yet not scared, no, instead they're pleading. He takes off her glasses.
"See for yourself." His eyes dart to the fabric holding her robe together then back to her.
She wants me to see how unlovable and damaged she thinks her body is...
He frowns a little, but does as she asks. He's slow and careful with his movements, so afraid he'll hurt her if he makes one false move.
He pauses when the fabric of rope falls to her sides. Her eyes shut once Kahlil pulls her robe apart. The material falls down her sides as he admires her sculpted body: painted with piercings and two tattoos.
His gaze begins at her breasts, which are hugged by her bra. There's also piercings poking through the material.
Barbells.
He feels his pants grow tighter as he continues down. Just under her beautiful breasts is a tattoo. It actually seems more like it's between them.
The tattoo is a feather breaking down into a rock like it's a steel sword. He moves closer to his eyes travel. She has a belly piercing as well. He grazes over it as his eyes automatically focus on her hips.
Delicious, mouthwatering hip piercings that he wants to kiss and suck on until his lips go numb..
then there's these.
Nevaeh's breath hitches when he grazes his thumbs over her hipbones. They're so prominent that it makes her body all that more irresistible.
Kahlil's starting to think she just made him discover a weird fetish that either he's always had and didn't know or just got because of her.
Her hips are definitely my favorite part of her body.
He stops when he notices ink on the side of her left hip. He touches the band on her panties, glancing up at her.
He's taken aback by her red face and sultry expression that follow along with her darken eyes. He quickly focuses back on the tattoo as he feels his lower half fully awaken.
Moving what he assumes is the band of a thong higher, he observes the ink that covers most of the upper, side part of her hip.
It looks like a rosebush, splashes of red and different tones of green. Vines also acting as names, written in fancy cursive.
Samuel. Nico. Victoria. Gina. Jonna. Rick. Willow. Thomas.
He runs his thumb over the professional masterpiece.
Her tattoo artist did this perfectly..
He hears a whimper, ripping him from her hip. Nevaeh sits up, her palms taking hold of his face.
"Kahlil, please, touch me." His dick is ready to burst out of his pants by now.
Stupid jeans.
"I don't—" Her lips connect with his before he can utter a word. She wraps around Khalil, fingers in hair and arms around hips as if she's been wanting, waiting for this for a long time.
Jesus Christ.
Nevaeh somehow ends up on top of him as they ravish each other. His tongue reaches out to taste her bottom lip as his hand kneads her thigh, the other holding her gorgeous face.
She moans into him as her hands move to his shirt. They break apart for a second while she removes it then he goes for her neck. Hands roam his upper body while he flips them over.
A breathy moan releases when he sucks on her delicate skin. Nevaeh's hands graze down his stomach causing him to shiver.
They continue down until her index fingers wrap around his belt loops. He grunts while she gasps when she pulls them closer.
"Kahlil." She puts more distance between her legs as he grips her hips.
So stiff.. damn, it hurts.
Her dainty little hand dives into his pants and grips him before he can stop her.
"Jesus, Nevaeh."
"Fuck, you're big!" His breathing becomes shallow as her hand tries to wrap itself all the way around him. He bites his lip when she moves to the base then slowly down until her thumb grazes the tip.
"Nevaeh." He warns, knowing her actions are more curious than promiscuous. Her big brown eyes meet his, their curiosity changing to mischief.
Before she can torture him any further, he grabs her butt in his hands and push his tip into her entrance. She moans before her hands moving to his button and zipper.
He quickly grabs her wrist before she can get to it the zipper, unfortunately, his erection did the job for her. She whines.
"Kahlil, please." His expression morphs into a pained one as he shakes his head. She tries to wriggle out of his grip, but
fighter or not,
she'll still never have the strength to harm him. He sighs, staring at the tattoo on her hip.
"I'm not going to take advantage of you like the others." His grip tightens, if it hurt her she didn't show it.
"No, you're not, I want this," his gaze flickers to hers as she looks at him through her eyelashes.
"I want you." He furrows his eyebrows.
As much as I want to be inside her I can't... it's not right.
He shakes his head.
"Nevaeh, I want so much more than your body and if I fuck you right now I'll be just like all the others." She frowns, confusion clear on her face.
God, she's so cute when she does that.
He swiftly moves away, fixing his jeans and putting on his shirt. She slowly sits up, watching him with careful eyes and a sad expression.
As Kahlil reaches her door he stops when his hand rests on the knob. He looks back at her with a determined and serious expression.
"Even with everything you've done or continue to do, you're still too good for anyone," his gaze travels to the door handle so he doesn't have to see her face. He doesn't want to know what type of expression she's showing.
Especially me.
⚀ ⚀ ⚀ ⚀
Ugh, what is wrong with me! I groan, throwing my fists at the air. Coming to him like that! What am I? An animal?!
Falling back into my bed, I wrap my robe around me. I run my fingers through but frown when I remember it's a wig. After a frustrated sigh, I tuck it off.
Not like I need it anyway since the whole world knows everything. I frown. Why did I have to show him everything?
I turn in my bed trying to get comfortable to make up for the discomfort in my heart. It blazes and burns while I'm numb and completely iced out.
I bite my tongue.
I knew shouldn't have ever let him in, any of them. It's not like them knowing will suddenly fix everything. I'm not a fucking damsel in distress and I definitely don't need a couple of knights in shining armor.
Them knowing just makes things more complicated, I should've never done anything. Just kept things short and casual then moved on...
I bite my bottom lip, a thin layer of skin breaking off.
But they wouldn't leave and...
I close my eyes, allowing the too warm, too familiar wet kisses pepper my lashes and cheeks.
I didn't want them to.
⚀ ⚀ ⚀ ⚀
"Ah, bad monkey!" Gina and Victoria run around the house while Nico chases them in his Halloween costume he wore last year.
Sammy and I laugh while Aunt Jonna shakes her head, trying to hide her smile.
"Don't run into anything, alright!" Jonna gets in just before they run out of sight. When giggling is heard in response she sighs, shaking her head.
"Samuel, could you keep an eye them please?" He nods, getting off the stool.
"Wouldn't want the neighbor's dog's toys glued to the walls with slime again." We all laugh before Sammy goes to do his needed duties.
I stand up from my spot as well and move towards Jonna.
"Wanna start dinner now?" I nod them we begin gathering all the needed materials. Once everything is out we start the cooking process. There's no speaking as we focus on our tasks. This causes my brain to wonder.
I frown as the events from earlier today pass my mind. Then this causes me to think about everything that's happened in the pass months. Then the months turn into years and my mind weakens, damages, and destroys.
Cuts become deeper and bruises become darker.
My eyes begin to blur while my heart takes on a life of its own.
I can't cry, it brings back pain that isn't mine alone. I rather let the marks on my body come to life, ripping and tearing at my damaged flesh.
I won't cry, it makes thinking simple thoughts painful. I rather drown in the sweet cannabis smoke, leaving my throat dry and depleted.
I need to, anything for release...
I take in a sharp breath when a hand touches my shoulder.
"Nevaeh." That's all that leaves her mouth before I completely break down.