It is a Monday. I dread Mondays. I drag my exhausted body out of the car. I was resting, but I feel like I didn't have enough rest.
"Argh!" I grunt. He looks at me in dismay. "It is a Monday and I hate morning classes" I express my hatred for Monday. "I just wanted to cuddle one more hour" I express my longing for him in a small baby voice.
I unexpectedly hung my arms around him. At realising this I jump back, but he grabs me before I could pull away from a place a peck on my forehead.
"Someone is addicted to me" He smirks playfully.
"Oh please, you are exhausting" I let him go and start walking.
"Have a great day " He blows a kiss for me. I smile at his gestures and blow him a kiss too. He gets in the car and drives away while she watches him.
"Love is in the air" Lucy exclaims cheerfully standing next to me
"It's been a month, isn't the harmony phase over" She sighs. I just gaze at her with no emotion. What is her problem?
"Why are you jealous? Is it because you are not the one riding in that car" She stares at Shirley warily.
"Oh please. I am not into him" She rolls her eyes.
I just leave them standing and squabbling. These arguments are becoming more often and I am trying not to be sceptical about them, about friendship. I have a feeling that there's more said behind my back when not looking and the words I hear are only the residues of what's said. I swallow hard as I feel my chest tighten up causing pressure on it. I feel pain in my chest and try to rub it quickly.
"Are you okay?" Lucy ask concerned
"Heartburn" I answer with a stern voice.
"Is your heart burning? " Shirley asks with a sarcastic voice. I gawk at her in surprise.
"Do you love or have a crush on him?" I turned and stare at her in annoyance.
"No!" She gives me a disbelief look.
"Then what's with the attitude? Oh, oh, wait, you think I am a homewrecker. Oh, wait, they weren't married nor dating so I am not racking any shit. He was single and I don't remember saying that he should not love her kid if it is even his baby. Who are you to judge me? We might be friends but it does not give you a right to judge me based on your sister's opinions. If you going to paint me with your sister's brush, we better of as not friends." I pause. "And another thing, He is mine not ours, my boyfriend not yours. Keep your dreams in your head, because He is mine!" I walk away from them and lead my way to the lecture hall.
I could feel their eyes on me, their judgmental, envious eyes on me. I had to put her in place, I can't have her disrespect me continuously like that.
*
We watch her walk away from us. Lucy gazes at her then shift her stare towards me.
"Dude!" She gritted her teeth.
"She insulted me, I am the victim. I can not believe she said all those horrible things about me" She bursts and few people stare at us then shift their gaze.
"Wow! Playing the victim doesn't suit you" She let out a cracking laugh.
"Okay fine! Hate for telling the truth" Her forehead becomes creased.
"Is it? Or the fact you wish you were her, kissing up to the Mala boy huh?" She was fuming.
"Oh no, I know that I can never have him. But I also know that she's losing herself and wrecking something real between Lala and Musa. Do you know people call Deya a slut? I am tired of defending her ungrateful ass, and if I don't seem like a good friend so be it" I start walking.
"Who calls Deya a slut?"
"People okay" She is now frustrated that Lucy is taking Deya's side, they have been friends for a while, but she's not supporting her, her high school friend. "You are a bad friend!" She turns her head and she met someone she wasn't expecting to see. She bit her lower lip. Did she say a lot, didn't she?
"And she calls you her friends" Musa sneers at us.
"Friends don't bad-mouth each other like that" Shudu's face is grim.
We look away in embarrassment.
"Are we in trouble? We were just talking, we didn't mean that at all, like not that way. We care about her a lot, a lot. " Lucy was now rumbling, she felt it.
The boys just chuckle and gaze at us in a grim expression.
"Don't ever talk about my sister that way again" Shudu's voice was firm and stern.
We swallow hard at hearing his commanding voice. When I glance at Lucy, she was drooling over Shudu. They walk away.
"I saw him leave" I exclaim with bafflement.
"I know right..." She is still in trance.
"Lucy you have a boyfriend" I rub my temple.
"Yes, I do, but it doesn't mean I can't drool over my crush" She pursed her lips.
I roll my eyes and we begin walking again towards class.
*
I get in class and head for the middle row. I don't want to sit next to them today. I am pissed, fuming. I am not even sure that we are friends.
I turn my head to glance at the back rows, I see them coming in and quickly turn my head so that they don't see me peeping over them. I don't want to look vulnerable and needy. I must think through this friendship.
Is it good for me? Do I need to be part of a circle that doesn't support me, that sides with the populace that criticise me. At least Lucy tries to defend me, but Shirley's words were a sword piercing into my heart.
Was it true, Am I a homewrecker? I feel betrayed by people I call my friends. Tears well up in my eyes, I try to sniffle them before they fall.
I receive a text from an unknown number.
"You have bad friends, choose wisely and get new friends. Your brother".
" Shudu..." I snort
I am better off alone. Now my brother is in my business.