Chereads / Love Lives in His Eyes [BL] / Chapter 51 - Find His Real Self

Chapter 51 - Find His Real Self

Exactly what was stressing Dominik so much?

Probably every reason that came to Andrzej's head, and maybe even a few more. Yeah, probably everything, photograph sighed mentally. If, since he was a teenager, the only person in his life was Marczak, who had total power over him and isolated him from the world, each new meeting and experience will be stressful for him. I'm not pushing him too much, are I?

Andrzej looked at Dominik sitting next to him. The actor gave the impression of being focused on his task, which was somewhat unnatural, as if he was putting in more effort than necessary.

Maybe I am asking too quickly and too much of him. After all, Dominik experienced something very shocking recently.

"Look, if you don't want to go to this meeting, I can cancel it" Andrzej suggested. He didn't want to see the suffering in that face again.

"No, it's all arranged. We will go."

"But ..."

Dominik smiled gently, though a little sadly.

"I can't spend my whole life escaping from people. I must finally stop being afraid of them."

"But if it's too fast ..."

"I can handle it," he said. "I did play much more difficult roles in the movies. I know that I have to be myself, but I can't really say who I am, Dominik Śliwiński. How much me is in me and how much is Mark's creation. The more I think about our past, the more I see how much I have done against myself. I got so used to it that I finally forgot who I really am."

This confession hurt. How much did Dominik have to think about his past and present to draw such bitter, though probably true, conclusions? How much bitterness must he have felt when he realized that everything he is now could actually be false?

"That's why I want to experience the new," the actor added decisively. "I want to start over and find out what I really like, not what I was taught to like. I don't know what I'll discover and it scares me a bit, but I want to try. I want to discover real me."

Andrzej was impressed by his words. Śliwiński seemed weak and delicate, but in fact he was a very strong and brave man. His confession impressed Nowicki. If he had been under someone's total domination for so many years, he probably wouldn't have found enough heroism to start living anew.

Who knows what he will find along the way? There is a chance that he will really discover that women are quite attractive and his orientation will change throughout his life.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Dominik was confused. A scarlet blush covered his face. "I said something stupid, right?"

"No" now Andrzej felt embarrassed. He did not know how to react to what Śliwiński said. "I think ... you're already halfway to your destination."

Although still flushed, Dominik smiled brightly. He may not know himself and only try to discover himself, but Andrzej knew one thing - this smile is completely sincere, flowing from the depths of Śliwiński's being and made him a big, hot sun in the hearts of people who looked at him.

***

Until the very moment of the first meeting between Dominik and the girls, Andrzej was not sure if he was doing right not to reveal to Marta the name of her dating partner. He didn't do it for two reasons - first, he didn't want her to expect too much of a future meeting with someone so famous, and second, he wanted Dominik to have as ordinary experiences as possible while being him. He sincerely hoped that not revealing a famous name too soon would help.

Dominik was nervous about this date. Over the past few days, he has expressed it more than once. Nowicki had never seen him so touched and uncertain, sometimes he considered even his friend's clumsy behavior charming. The actor has had many public appearances and conversations with Hollywood celebrities, while the thought of a double date awaiting him could hardly keep his cool and his cheeks were burning with excitement almost all the time.

Now, as they stood in front of the girls' apartment, dressed very nicely, though without exaggerated elegance, he began to take on a facade that would allow him to get through this evening.

Andrzej knew that everything would go very well. Dominik knew his role today, as did the girls. Marta knew the first name of her date and that it is one of the headlines, so the shock of seeing Śliwiński should not be too big for her. He had known her for several years and knew that she would be able to act naturally. She was forewarned that Dominik had just broken up with someone, so her gentleness and tact would not allow her to ask too personal questions. Anyway, for her and Śliwiński it was supposed to be, first of all, a meeting. Neither of them expected this relationship to turn into something more. These hopes belonged exclusively to Andrzej.

Dominik has never been on a date, but the characters he played - yes. It is true that on the set, if something does not work out, it is repeated until the desired effect is achieved, Nowicki was firmly convinced that his friend would do well. After all, he already knew him well enough to make such assumptions with certainty.

He smiled at Śliwiński, wanting to cheer him up. As their eyes met, the actor's face took on a calm expression.

"You can do it," said Andrzej.

"Yes, I know" Dominik smiled subtly. He really looked lovely in a beige shirt and a light coffee and milk jacket. In his hand he was holding a beautiful orange rose intended for Martha. If the girl does not fall in love with him immediately at the sight, she must be blind.

Paulina once said that every man deserves love. She was probably right, as always. But if so, then Dominik deserved it in particular - a normal, sincere and affectionate love, free from selfishness.

"Are you feeling confident?" Andrzej asked half-jokingly.

"No," he replied in a completely relaxed tone. "I trust your judgment."

Andrzej had heard Dominik say more than once that he was trusted by him, but these words always filled him with pride and joy. In such a short time, the acquaintance of the two had a special kind of closeness - a really sincere friendship.

"So what?" Nowicki bared his teeth in a smile. "Are we ringing the doorbell??

"Do the honors."

They didn't wait long when Marta appeared in the doorway. Andrzej had just expected it. Usually Ewelina could never prepare herself on time and it was Marta who almost always did honor to the lady of the house. She opened the door with a smile that died on her lips in an expression of surprise as her eyes met Śliwiński.