Chapter 9 - 09

ALEX'S POV

I was in my room about to grab one of the blades from my box when there was a knock on my door. I quickly put them under my bed.

"Come in!" I shout. Mom comes in.

"Alex, we need to talk." She said sitting down on my bed next to me.

"About what?" I asked.

"I was thinking that you should go to therapy. I also scheduled an appointment to see your doctor."

"Why though? I'm fine." I say as I look away from her eyes.

"You're not fine, Alex! You relapsed the other day, and you've been purging! I don't want your mental state to get worse than what it is now. I don't want to see you become very unhealthy. I'm worried about you, baby girl."

"But.. I'm not crazy! M-Mom! I'm not c-crazy!" I tear up as I start shaking.

"Alex. Look at me, baby." She says as she lifts my face up to look at her. "Breathe. I know you're not crazy. No one is saying you're crazy, baby girl." She pulls me into her warm embrace. "What's going on in that pretty little mind of yours?"

"I.. I know I need help, Mom. I do, but it's easier said than done." I choked out.

"I know, baby. I know." She whispers in my ear. "I'll be here every step of the way though."

I then said something I didn't want to slip out. "I want to die, Mommy. I want to be happy."

"Baby.. why?" Her grip tightens on me.

"Everyone says I should. E-Even your Lovatics. I.. I didn't want to say anything.. I.." I look up and notice she's tearing up. "I.. I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you cry.." I whispered.

"No.. no.. it's fine, baby girl. I'm glad you're telling me how you're feeling." She kissed my forehead and then pulled out her phone.

"What are you doing?" I asked. A minute later I got a twitter notification.

@ddlovato: I just found out that some of my "Lovatics" are telling my daughter @AlexisGraceLovato to kill herself. Along with some people at her old school. Please, don't call yourself Lovatics if you're going to say that to MY daughter. You're hurting both her and I. Words hurt more than punches. Be kind to one another. You'll never know if someone will take their life because of it.

"Come on. It's time to get ready for your photo shoot." She says standing up and taking my hand.

"But my makeup is running."

"It's okay. They will do it there. Go wipe it off." I nod and do as she says.

"Mom.. thanks again by the way." I hugged her tightly.

"I love you. Don't forget it." She kissed my forehead.