"Fuck'' . The young sixteen year old man cursed at the sight of something unpleasant. One way of showing disgust towards something they are generally not fond of or hate it is through cursing. We do it knowingly or unknowingly, it comes out our mouth. Some say its disgraceful, unholy word. Well, I say its just a normal word which is made up like this by? Disgraceful, gross, ill-mannered word used by those kind of person is made by us HUMANS only. Hypothetically, its just made to relieve one's stress and anxiety built over time and when it happens too often...it generally becomes a Habit out of nowhere.
''Mommy, lets go somewhere together and get some Baskin Robins Ice-creams~ yum~'' A young girl excitedly asked her mother. The mother showed affection towards her daughter while her eyes sparkled with millions of affection in it. ''Yea...sure lets go hon...''The mother answered while smiling.
A sharp gaze pierced through the scene of love and affection one holds for their own child. The owner of the eyes looking at the scene was sitting on a top of the tree, while resting his head at the back, along the tree.
Coming through hundreds of scenarios inside his head but not a single one was worth remembering; rather brought discomfort to oneself. Slowing closing his eyes , the scenes became a lot prominent to the extent it made the young man curse AGAIN. ''Damn it''.
The little girl was happily moving round the park and was about to leave when suddenly her big doe eyes landed on the stiff yet calm soulful body which was lying quietly on one of the strongest branches of a tree.
''Woah!! Mommy look at that...a person!! A PERSON!! ON THE TREE!!'' The shouting made the young man, open one of his eyes in a slight manner just to look what the hustle was about.
The mother definitely noticed his eyes and without any moment to waste she apologized for her MISTAKE. Mistake. The word 'Mistake' holds so many meanings itself. Fault, Misleading actions , Miscalculating, etc . That's why one should mention the accurate meaning. Otherwise misunderstanding can be caused.
The boy opened his eyes looked towards the child and told a little louder , ''Wait!'' The boy climbed down the tree and ran towards the kid and her mother where they were standing. Upon reaching he bent down to the child's height so that he could face her.
''What's your name kiddo?'' He asked in a lighter tone . A soulful voice carrying a calm texture within which would make you feel protected and wanted. Very unlike to those he himself heard.
''Ri-Rizu'' ,the girl stuttered but answered.
''Rizu...its totally okay to be curious what's going on in your surrounding. So no need to be sorry''. He moved his head looking at her mom and smiled. ''Bye''. With that he stood up and waved her good-bye.
He saw the two affectionate figures, as they walked off until they cant be seen anymore in the view. Slowly his face showed a fading smile as if he lacked that kind of comfort. That kind of affection. That kind of LOVE.
He came back to his senses, when his phone rang. Disturbed by that sound. He unwillingly took the phone. Upon looking the caller id, he rolled his eyes. He was non affectionate towards that caller, hating that person to the bitter. BUT something in him always, made him pick the call as if it was his damn duty to pick it. No matter how much he despise picking that call up. He WILL. Eventually pick up.
Sliding down the answer button he nonchalantly answered the call. ''What is it?'' Harshness was in his voice, a deep-down hatred was evitable in his voice. The voice which was just before was so soulful and deep, how can it change to the extent that it sound so dark, and mysterious?
Eyes and Voice will always tell the hidden emotions which lies in ones heart. A once red heart which is now nothing but a black hole. What emotions can one expect from it? How someone can still believe one can give a pure happy bright smile with a heart like that? Only a painful smile is what it can show. NOTHING ELSE. A SMILE WITHOUT FEELINGS.
''Can we meet Ayato? Please I wanna talk to you''. Answered the voice from the other side of the call.
''Are you fucking serious?'' He answered in a sarcastic manner. ''When did you for gods sake started to call me 'Ayato' huh? Cut the crap out lady...why don'cha mind your own business''.
''W-what? Ayato...I am really sorry, I mean it. Please listen to your-'' Before she could finish he answered aggressively.
''SHUT UP! Don't. You. Dare. Say IT''. Didn't want to hear anymore of those drivel words he ended the call. ''BLOODY FUCKING HELL...Shit-'' He spatted out and ran his fingers through his light-chestnut colored hair.
He sat down the bench on the park and let himself calm down. Nothing more than this make him angry. Aggressive. He locked his fingers into his, bent down and kept his forehead over it. After some minutes went on, he stood up rubbing his nape while looking down he thought, 'Was I too harsh on her?' His words were self inflicted. His heart tells something while his brain tells something else. He was supposed to be following his mind but when he realized it, it was already too late.
He was standing in front of the gate where the woman wanted him to be.
'Why? Why? What she did was wrong...everything was covered with lie...Why am I standing here?' He thought.
''Damn it! tsk!!!'' Just when he was turning to go back a voice called him.
''Ayato!!!'' Sudden approach of the voice made his eyes widen.
''Shit...''
"Aya- "
Abruptly he said, ''I came for myself , not for you...just so you know''. Still his back facing her. She couldn't believe that HE really came.
''I am happy that you came Ayato...'' He gulped when he heard his own damn name coming from her mouth.
'Her voice is shaky', he thought. He lifted his head to the side a little to glance over her.
'There...she is again crying'.
He faced himself in front of her and told,'' Stop crying like a baby, and come inside''.
Eyes wandering off somewhere. ''Yea...lets go inside...Ayato...I am SORRY to make you stand here looking at my pathetic self''. He didn't reply and went straight inside the house.
Everyone welcomed him as usual, nothing changed, everything was the same as before. The only thing which was changed was Time which can't be brought back. The house was the same just like before, except someone's belongings and profile was all removed. As if there wasn't even that person's existence from the beginning. Sounds crazy to the young boy who have witnessed so much in his 16 year span of life.
LIFE. Life is all about ups and downs. The ups will always be equivalent to the downs in LIFE. So when there is any Happy moment going on in one's life, one should learn to protect and live it. Basically, they love the happy moments but then why though, when the downs come into someone's life one asks, 'Why me?' , 'What have I done wrong in my life to be this miserable?' etc. But seriously , WHY? Can you answer that yourself ? Deep inside you will always know WHY but somewhere you will pretend not to see it.
The chestnut colored haired boy, sat on the couch which was a little too comfy. A kind lady with parted hair came, with her usual smile which she showed him, just like before when he needed it the most. Years have gone, she haven't seen the boy she loved dearly. When she first came she was a young lady who was married to the person she romantically had feelings for. Happy moment it was. Admiring. Cheerful environment. Mrs.Yuna...never failed to cheer up the boy during his worst TIME.
''Umm...Young master?'' She thought, he left her, left everything behind. Moved forward with his life but was never sure if he had been okay, if he was living well or not. She was relieved at the sight but, now that she had seen him up so close, not him as a toddler, but now as a young adult. Can she suppress her feelings? Millions of thought were left unexplained in her mind, Yuna. The once cheerful, loved, and caring lady now in her late 40's, upon seeing the boy whom she dearly thought of her own son, healthy, sitting there, with his deep like ocean eyes, which were before only filled with tears. Tears of Sorrow and emptiness.
Staring right into her eyes, Ayato understood what he did ages ago was wrong, it was a downhill in her life; him leaving her behind with all those shit.
''Told you not to call me that, Mrs. Yuna''. He stood up and went to her, who was wearing a shocked expression due to the overloading happiness.
''How have you been, aunt?'' he stood before her.
''A-Ayato? U are o-okay--'', before completing her words, she started crying. Tears of happiness.
''Stop crying, I'm here..see? Rest assured I'm not gonna leave you alone this time''. He whispered talked to her while sliding her tears with his thumbs.
''Y-Yes..u are here , my dear little boy'', she smiled while wiping her tears off.
''Definitely, not this time, I'm gonna stand behind and watch everything...with popcorns, I swear''. He whispered to himself.
''Did you say something, Ayato?'' Mrs. Yuna turned back to ask him. ''Huh? No, nothing its just that, I am not that little weakling now...'' he giggled.
''Yes, I can see that''. She answered with a bright smile.
They sat on the couch and started talking about how things were. Ayato was going to a good school , he had a nice sportsmanship within him. From the beginning. He also excelled in studies, not that he was a top student, but he was overall a better student out there. Popular in highschool. Was he ever bullied? Well, no , he wasnt . Now in high school, he pulls out tricks to the teachers whom he felt was a 'nagging boomer'. Overall, he was quite a handful student.
Mrs.Yuna, was happily looking and listening to the boy who was talking a little cheerfully. Seeing someone who had expressed nothing but gloominess in his past years was quite a sight for her. Happiness, is what she felt watching her. She had known him since he was 1.5 year old. When nothing strange happened. When Time, Fate and Destiny didn't play dirty with the people around him. AND HIM.
The door of the room they were in, suddenly opened only to reveal, the woman he despite the most. TSK. Just the sight of this lady makes him nauseous. The lady came forward.
''Mam do you want some water?'' Yuna asked rather in a very generous manner.
"No, I would like you to sit down and talk with him''. The lady answered in a calm tone. ''You both must have missed each other very much right?'' Her voice dropped down when she said it.
Knowing he would never miss her the way he would miss Yuna. Ofcourse, can she blame it? No. After how she behaved, with him , what kind of looks were delivered to him before, she didn't dare to ask, 'Did you miss me? Ayato?'
Words cut deeper than knife, and she knew it very well. But what she could have possibly done? After what she suffered. What she suffered inside herself earlier because of Ayato.
Imagine being told what to do, what not to, whom to love, whom not to, whom to despise , whom not to. Imagine living someone else' expectations and words which were not yours. Even your own decisions , which should be taken by one self. Imagine them taken by someone else. Living a life like a puppet. Controlled by someone whom you thought of your own one. Still, pretending to be okay, pretending to be happy, as if nothing happened. Always putting up a facade of a smile over your sorrows and sadness. Is this what it should be called happiness? As long as it gives you money, respect and being known, is it called happiness? She didn't know...she never got to understand it. But just when she could have been , it was shattered. Shattered into pieces. Done by? Herself, she killed her own happiness.
She has grown a detestation from her meaning of happiness. And she can't help it.