I knew it," I muttered. "You're crazy."
We were sitting in the cafeteria, lunch trays in front of us. I was directing a glare at Archie who, at the moment, was beaming with a look of such pure innocence he would have put a Catholic saint to shame.
"Dude, of course we are totally still having the graduation gig. It wouldn't feel like a real graduation without one."
"I feel like this is completely not the time for this," I grumbled. Glancing around, I added more quietly, "You know...with everything that's going on."
Archie sighed. "Look, there are a few things we need to get in order now and that's going to take some time. I don't see any point just sitting around waiting for the blade to drop. We should be living! Especially right now." He added casually, "You're only going to graduate high school—for the first time—once, you know."
Edythe shot Archie a disapproving look for talking so freely, which he answered with a dismissive wave of his hand and roll of his eyes. He was right, of course—there was no way his voice would carry over the excited babble.
I shook my head, but realized there was no point arguing. "What things do you need to get in order?" I asked.
Edythe kept her voice low as she replied. "To give ourselves every advantage, we need allies in this fight. Tanvir's family isn't our only option. Carine's trying to find a few old friends at the moment, and Jessamine's hoping to track down Petra and Charles. It's crossed her mind even to speak to Miguel, but I don't think she's considering that seriously. The last and only time we encountered him, things were...colorful, to say the least. Miguel claims not to harbor any resentment for Jessamine's leaving the way she did, but that's not entirely true, and if Miguel did help us, he'd certainly expect some kind of significant favor in return. Not to mention none of us are really all that eager to bring the southerners and their way of life here."
I stared down at my tray. If Jessamine had even thought about going to Miguel of all people, the one who had ushered her into a world of violence, that could only mean she considered the situation extremely desperate.
Edythe continued, "I don't think it will be difficult to rally a few others to our cause. None of us want to be exposed to the human world, and no one wants to find out what Sulpicia might do by the way of cleanup if things are allowed to really spiral out of control."
I hesitated. "These allies," I said, trying to sound nonchalant. "They aren't going to be...vegetarians, are they?" It was more a statement than a question.
Edythe's face turned abruptly wary. "No," she said. "No, they won't be."
I felt something twist in my stomach. The idea of non-vegetarian vampires...here in Forks. And it only further proved how grave the circumstances were. They needed allies, and they needed them bad.
"Don't worry, Beau," Edythe said softly, putting a hand over mine. "These are friends. They won't be any danger to anyone here in Forks."
I nodded, though I looked away. The truth was, I hoped they would come—if they gave my family a better chance to all come out alive, I'd gladly invite whoever I needed to into town, no matter what they ate.
Archie opened his mouth to say something, but then a blank look crossed his face. I knew he was seeing something, and for a moment, I tensed.
However, when he came out of it, he only looked minorly put out. "Dang, I just hate when people have to cancel. That's going to bring the list down to sixty-five."
I gaped at him, silently mouthing the number. Sixty-five—did I even know that many people?
Archie sighed. "Your mom. She was going to fly up here as kind of a surprise graduation gift thing, but...well, I'm sure you'll hear about it when you get back. She's left a message on your phone."
I blinked, then had to suppress a smile. This felt like my first stroke of good fortune in weeks. The last thing I wanted was my mom in Forks when there could be non-vegetarian vampires prowling around before long.
"Oh yeah," Archie said. "By the way, there's something else she has to tell you, too." His voice was just a bit too casual.
I glanced at him curiously. "What?"
He grinned a little, and shook his head. "You'll find out."
The message light on the phone was flashing when I got home. I found myself smiling as I listened to my mom describe Phil's accident on the ball field—apparently while doing a slide he'd tangled up with the catcher and broken his thigh bone. She had to take care of him and there was no way she could leave. She was still apologizing when the message cut off.
"Something funny?" Edythe asked, eying my expression with wary confusion.
I picked up the phone, ready to call my mom. "Not really. Just I think I could kiss Phil right now. He chose a good weekend to get laid up, I couldn't have planned it better myself."
Edythe seemed to understand and she looked at me incredulously, then rolled her eyes.
I shook my head. "I really don't get why you and Archie don't seem to be taking this seriously. I mean, Jessamine's the expert, and she's actually considering bringing up her southern buddies. She wouldn't even go there if this wasn't life or death."
Edythe smiled and took my hand between hers, running her fingers playfully along mine, tracing my knuckles. "Maybe Archie and I are just young and naïve."
I gave her a dark look at her flippancy. "I bet it's overconfidence," I muttered as I punched in my mom's number.
It was a long conversation, especially considering I wasn't able to get more than a few words in edgewise. No, Mom, it's fine, really, I totally understand. I'm not disappointed, I'm not annoyed. Just take care of Phil. Tell him I said I hope he gets better soon and, okay, I'll tell you everything from Forks High's plain, generic graduation.
At last I had to tell her I had finals I really needed to study for. However, before I could get off, she said, "Oh, one last thing. I can't believe I nearly forgot—but between Phil getting hurt and missing your graduation—I'm so sorry, sweetie—"
"It's okay, Mom," I said, unable to keep the sigh from my voice. "Really."
"Well—" she began, and I was surprised to hear a note of something like embarrassment. "It seems like—well, I'm pregnant."
I was quiet for a minute, too stunned to say anything. Finally, I managed to stutter out, "That—that's great, Mom. I didn't know you were trying for more kids."
She laughed a little, sounding almost nervous. "Well, we weren't actually. I guess I must have been careless. But—"
I knew my mom well enough that I could hear the mix of emotions in her voice, even over the phone. On the surface, she sounded almost radiant with joy, but I also detected an undercurrent of nerves, and just a little guilt.
"That's great, Mom," I said again, with real enthusiasm this time. "Now, you have to take care of yourself. No skydiving. Make sure you're getting all your vitamins. Get Phil in on it, he can help—uh, after he gets over his leg, I guess."
She laughed with relief. "Oh, I will. He's so excited. I was a little worried telling him at first, since we hadn't talked too much about kids, but—he honestly seems so happy, I know he'll make a good dad."
"Of course he will," I said. I paused. "But, really, Mom. I've got to go, I really need to get studying. Or I might not actually graduate."
She laughed. "You're going to make me believe my responsible son has put off studying until the last possible minute?"
I glanced down at Edythe, who had been standing beside me the entire conversation, contently tracing the knuckles on the back of my hand.
"Uh, well, I've been...kind of preoccupied lately."
"I'll bet," she said with a knowing laugh. "Okay, sweetie. I'll see you. I'm so sorry I couldn't be there. Love you."
"It's okay, Mom," I said. "I love you, too."
I hung up the phone.
Edythe was looking up at me curiously. "She sounded a bit tense when she told you she was pregnant, didn't she?" she said thoughtfully.
I stared down at her for a second, then frowned. "You knew what she was going to say."
"When Archie saw that she was going to have to cancel, he also saw the other thing she was going to tell you. It seems like she only just found out this morning." She eyed me for a second. "I would have thought that would be the type of news she would be thrilled to share with you. But her tone...she sounded stressed."
I glanced at Edythe, and it took me a second to realize that of course she couldn't hear my mom's thoughts over the phone.
"Yeah," I said. "With me being away, I figured she would probably be worried, you know, about me feeling left out or something. Like she's getting a new family, and replacing me."
"Oh," Edythe said. "I see." She gazed up at me for a moment. "You really understand your mother, don't you?" she said softly.
I shrugged. "If she calls me her open book, I like to think that goes two ways."
Edythe nodded, eyes still studying me.
I slumped against the counter. "Anyway, glad the thing with Phil happened now. That's at least one person who'll be safe come this Saturday."
"It is a good thing, I suppose," Edythe said, "if it puts your mind at ease."
I sighed, shaking my head.
"So," Edythe said, letting our hands fall a little, even as she entwined her fingers with mine. "By the way. I'm going hunting tomorrow. With Carine, Earnest, and Royal. Only a few hours—we'll stay close. You'll just be staying for awhile with Archie, Jessamine, and Eleanor.
I grimaced. Tomorrow was the last day of finals—Calculus and History—and it was only a half day, so I wouldn't be able to count on school to keep me occupied.
"Babysat," I muttered. "Jessamine's probably going to sit there looking bored. And Eleanor will probably rehash every single time she's seen me trip over my own two feet."
"It'll only be a few hours," Edythe said soothingly. "And I'll make sure they're on their best behavior."
Yeah. Like I believed that.
However, a thought occurred to me. "Hey," I said slowly, cautiously. "You know...I haven't been to La Push in a while. Since the bonfire."
The only change in Edythe's careful expression was that I saw the corners of her mouth tighten fractionally.
"I would be safe there," I pointed out.
Edythe hesitated, then sighed. "Yes, you probably would be."
Her face was calm, but just a little too smooth. I almost took it back and said maybe I'd stay at her house after all, but then I thought of Eleanor's relentless teasing compared with the prospect of hanging out with my best friend again, and I didn't say anything. Instead, I asked, "Are you thirsty already?" I cupped my hand around her cheek and, with my thumb, rubbed the light shadow beneath her eye. Her irises were still a deep gold.
Edythe glanced away. "No...not really." She paused, and when her eyes wandered back to my expectant, questioning expression, she sighed.
"We want to be as strong as possible," she explained. "When it comes time for the fight, we'll probably hunt again on the way, looking for big game."
"That makes you stronger?" I said curiously. I'd never thought about it, but of course, it made sense.
"...Yes," Edythe said slowly. She added reluctantly, "It's human blood that makes us the strongest, though only fractionally. Jessamine...the thought of cheating has crossed her mind. As deeply averse as she is to the idea, when she gets into her mode for battle—well, she's used to doing everything to give her side every possible advantage. But I don't think she'll bring it up. She knows Carine would never agree to it."
My hand was still on her cheek, and I gazed down into her eyes. I heard myself say evenly, "Would that help?"
Edythe gazed up at me, her mouth set. "We won't do it. No matter the consequences, we won't betray ourselves." However, as she looked up into my face, I thought I saw a flicker of something deep in her eyes. She reached up and gently stroked my cheek, and I could see a conflict in her expression. Then she sighed and pulled away, half turning away from me.
My hand felt numb where it had touched her, and my tongue that had asked the question burned. Would that help? If I knew it would give her a better chance of survival, even just by a fraction...if killing some stranger would make her just a little stronger, a little less likely to be hurt or killed—was I willing to see that?
Even having the thought for a moment felt monstrous, wrong. And yet...the more I thought about it, the more I realized that, for some sick part of me, it was true.
Edythe turned back to me, changing the subject. "That's why the newborns are so strong, of course. They're full of human blood—their own blood, reacting to the change. It lingers in their tissues, and their bodies slowly use it up. The strength usually starts to wane after about a year."
"How strong will I be?" I asked, curious.
Edythe smiled a little. "Well, stronger than I am."
"What about Royal? Eleanor?"
Edythe was grinning now. "Yes, even Eleanor. Do me a favor, and when you're changed, challenge her to an arm-wrestling match. She could use having someone knock her down a peg."
I laughed, a part of me enjoying the idea, but I privately resolved against it. I was only going to be super-strong for a year, and even if Eleanor didn't hold grudges, Royal might on her behalf. And he already had reason enough to have a grudge against me. I didn't want to have to be watching my back for centuries to come.
I suddenly sighed and made a face. "Well, guess it's time to study. If I'm going to cram a year's worth of knowledge into my brain before finals, I better get started. Or, like I told my mom, I might not actually graduate."
Edythe smiled. "You'll graduate." She added with a sly expression, "What do you think bribes are for?"
I gave her a look, and decided it was better not to answer that.
My studies went a lot smoother than I was used to with Edythe there to act as a tutor. I figured as long as I concentrated during the tests, I could be reasonably confident I'd do okay—on the other hand, if I wasn't concentrating, I might just end up writing my history essay on the vampire wars of the South.
Midway through the afternoon I took a break to call Jules. Edythe showed no sign of edginess or agitation, and played with my hand again, like she had when I was talking to my mom.
Jules seemed unusually out of it at first—though it was the middle of the day, apparently she'd been asleep. However, she snapped out of it and perked right up when I asked if I could visit the next day. As the Quileute school was already out for the summer, she told me to come over as early as I could.
I was feeling good as I hung up the phone. It was a relief not to have to spend the day getting ribbed by Eleanor, and with graduation so close, it would be nice to spend more time with Jules.
The next day Edythe drove me to border again—I tried to focus on the president-bodyguard imagery for these slightly obsessive escorts, but I still mainly felt like a kid, being passed off from one custodial guardian to another.
"So, how do you feel about your exams?" Edythe asked conversationally.
I shrugged. "History wasn't bad, but I'm not sure about Calculus. It actually seemed like it was making sense, so that probably means I duffed it."
Edythe laughed. "That bribing option is still open."
"Thanks, but no thanks."
Edythe grinned again, but the expression froze as we turned the final bend and caught sight of the red car waiting by the road. Edythe pursed her lips, and seemed to be concentrating on something as she parked the car.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Nothing." Edythe's eyes were narrowed, and she was staring through the windshield straight at the other car across the way.
I turned to look at the car, but it was too far for me to make Jules out clearly. I looked back to Edythe. "Is she saying something to you?" I asked.
"Yes," Edythe said, without looking away from the other windshield. Then, "No, not to me. More like to the entire neighborhood. If she was thinking any more loudly, I couldn't hear myself think."
"What's she saying?" I asked, not quite able to curb my curiosity.
Edythe sighed. "Don't worry, I'm sure she'll tell you herself."
"Um, okay." I got out of the car quickly and hurried over, hoping Jules wouldn't have time to do something that would really set Edythe's teeth on edge.
Before I reached the Rabbit, I paused and turned back a minute to wave. From this distance, it looked like Edythe was glaring at Jules with an expression of pure poison. But, it was really too far away to see clearly, so maybe I was just imagining it.
There were definitely times I wished I could somehow get Edythe and Jules to get along. If it wasn't for the whole vampire-werewolf, mortal-enemies things...
Sighing, I climbed on into Jules's car and shut the door.
"Hey," Jules said, grinning. "You're back."
Although Jules's tone was cheerful, her voice dragged a little, and I studied her face as she started off down the road.
She looked different than she had at the bonfire—almost sick. Her eyelids drooped and the russet skin of her face was drawn and pale. She had dark half circles, not unlike a vampire, beneath her eyes, and her hair looked as though it hadn't seen a brush in a few days.
"You okay?" I asked uncertainly. "You look kind of...I don't know."
"Just tired," she managed, though the last word was distorted around around a huge yawn. She reached up and absently began combing her fingers through her hair, trying to make it lie flat. "So what do you want to do today?"
I eyed her for a minute, then said, "How about we just chill at your place for a while? Maybe we can ride our bikes later." I didn't think she looked up for anything too strenuous at the moment.
"Sure, sure," she said, waving a hand, and yawning so widely I could see her canines. I almost expected them to be long and sharp, like a dog's, but they looked totally normal.
Jules's house was empty when we got there, and I looked around in confusion.
"Where's Bonnie?" I asked.
Jules shrugged. "I drove her over to the Clearwaters earlier. Saul likes to have someone to talk to, so she's been over there a lot. I think it's been helping him cope a little with losing Holly." Jules hesitated, then added, "And I guess, you know, he's been kind of struggling with...somethings to do with his kids."
I nodded. I could only imagine what Sarah and Lee were going through, losing their mom like that.
Without seeming to think about what she was doing, Jules picked up the remote and flipped on the TV. Again she put a hand to her mouth as she tried to stifle another yawn.
I shook my head. "You know, you're starting to remind me of this zombie movie I saw. Don't tell me now you're a werewolf and the undead."
Jules chuckled. "I feel a bit like the undead. I got about two hours of sleep last night, and four the night before that. I guess I'm not the Energizer bunny after all. I could use a recharge."
"You aren't sleeping?" I asked, brow furrowing. "Why?"
Jules sighed. "It's just Sam. She still won't trust your bloodsuckers, so she won't send anyone onto their land. So I've been running double shifts myself to keep an eye on things."
I stared at her. "Hold on. This is because you're still looking out for me?" I shook my head. "Look, you've got to cut it out. You'll run yourself right into the ground."
Jules seemed abruptly more alert. "It's no big deal. Hey, did you find out who was in your room?"
I shook my head. "No...nothing." I wondered if I should tell her about what we suspected was going on in Seattle—however, I thought better of it. If she was going this far just for my one visitor, if I told her anything else she might not sleep at all.
"Yeah, I didn't think so," she said, closing her eyes. "Don't worry, I'll be around."
"That makes me worry more," I muttered. "Seriously, if you die of exhaustion out there because of me, I'll never forgive you."
Jules laughed. "I'm not doing this all for you, you know. I'm hoping to get my teeth in a bloodsucker. I'll be the envy of the entire pack."
I didn't smile, only glared at her.
"Sheesh," she muttered. "You're so serious."
We sat in silence for a minute, staring at the TV, though I wasn't really seeing it.
"So," said Jules at last. "Any special plans next week?" Her voice turned abruptly flat. "You're graduating. Wow, that's big."
I glanced at her, and her suddenly haggard expression. I knew what my graduation meant to her—though at the moment, it looked like my plans might be disrupted.
"Well," I said, making a face. "I have a graduation partly, apparently. Does that count? Planned against my will, incidentally."
Jules smiled at this and, as I'd hoped, seemed to take this as confirmation the thing she dreaded wouldn't be happening just yet. "Huh, are you? I didn't get an invitation."
"You're invited," I said. "It's my party."
Jules snorted. "Thanks a lot. Me at a party full of vampires. That would be smart."
"It might actually be almost fun if you were there," I said. And I realized I meant it, even as I knew the chance she would come was pretty much zilch. Much as I might want to do something about it, the vampire-werewolf situation was one of many things out of my control.
Eyes closed, Jules grinned a little, shaking her head as if I was crazy. "Really...smart..." she repeated in a mumble.
Then her breathing became deep and even, and I could tell she was asleep.
I studied her face for a minute. Funny how, when she was asleep, she always looked so much more like the Jules I knew before all this craziness about werewolves. She looked younger...not so hard, or so bitter.
I thought it was better she get some rest, so I settled into the couch, grabbing the remote and flipping through channels. There wasn't a whole lot on, but at last I settled for a cooking show. It seemed safe...and normal.
I felt oddly relaxed, and my eyes felt heavy. This house somehow felt safer than mine—maybe because no vampires had ever come looking for me here.
I sat there for awhile in a kind of semi-awake stupor, not really seeing the television, my mind drifting in and out as my thoughts wandered.
Finals were done. My high school education was over...It was hard to know how to feel about that. I wasn't entirely sure I felt much of anything. It seemed so minor next to the fact my human life would soon be over too. On that front, my emotions were high and all a jumble. I was happy...and nervous, and terrified. This was what I wanted—yet, there were definitely things I was going to lose that I would miss. My parents, my friends at school...and...
Jules shifted in her sleep beside me. Her head, which had been leaning against the back of the couch, suddenly flopped onto my shoulder and she twisted, turning toward me.
I gasped slightly at the unexpected weight. Jules was a little shorter than I was, but she was heavier than I could have guessed—it was like being under a sack of barbells. I was also very suddenly uncomfortably hot. I felt like I was sitting under a blast furnace.
I sat there for a minute, debating whether I should move and risk waking her, or just let her use me as a pillow until she woke up. However, as I felt the entire left side of my body go numb, and sweat broke out on my skin, I finally worked up the nerve to try to sidle out from under her. She might be more comfortable if she could lay down anyway.
However, I wasn't all that smooth, and I'd only made it part way when she abruptly snapped awake.
She leaped to her feet, bleary eyes darting this way and that. "What? What?" she demanded, clenched fists raised for a fight.
"Just me, Jules. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."
She turned to look at me, and she frowned hazily. "Beau?" she said, squinting. She looked around the room, confused for a second, then seemed to remember.
"Did I fall asleep?" she demanded.
I paused. "Yeah," I admitted.
"Stupid, why didn't you wake me up? How long has it been?"
I shrugged. "Not long. Maybe a half an hour. I'm not sure, I was kind of out of it, too."
Jules blew out a sigh as she threw herself back down on the couch. "Wasting time," she muttered. "I can't believe it."
"It really looked like you could use the rest," I noted.
She yawned and stretched, then shook her head vigorously.
"Let's go outside," she said. "I might fall asleep again if we stay in here."
"Maybe I should go," I said uncertainly. "I mean, sleep deprivation isn't healthy. Maybe I can come back another time." I patted my pockets for Edythe's phone, but I couldn't find it. Maybe I'd left it in her car. Edythe normally gave it to me just before I went, but she'd seemed a bit distracted.
Jules reached out and grabbed my hand, gripping it tight. "No way, you just got here." She looked up at me, in her eyes just a hint of desperation.
I hesitated, trying to think of what I should say. However, before I could decide, Jules was up again, towing me toward the door.
It had gotten cooler while Jules had been asleep. Almost unseasonably cold—must be a storm on the way. It felt more like February than May.
The wintry air seemed to stimulate Jules, and she seemed more alert as she led me automatically along the rough path toward her homemade garage. However, we hadn't even passed beyond the edge of the house when she suddenly stopped. Jules's body was suddenly tense, her hand firmly gripped around mine.
"Jules?"
"I...wanted to talk to you," she said suddenly. "About something."
I shrugged. "So talk."
Jules was squinting in the direction of the treetops. Maybe I was just imagining things, but I thought her russet skin looked a shade darker than usual. She seemed to notice she was still holding my hand and she let it go quickly, folding her hands in front of her. She fidgeted.
I was about to tell her to spit it out, but then I remembered Edythe's cryptic remarks about Jules's thoughts earlier, and I wondered if I really wanted to know.
Jules laughed nervously, the sound a little higher than her usual laugh.
"This is probably going to sound like it's coming out of nowhere," she began. "And kind of cheesy. I was sort of hoping the mood would just kind of build up to it and it would just come out natural, but..." Her eyes rose from the treetops to the sky above, the usual deep blue a slight gray as the storm approached. When she spoke, her voice came out as a whisper. "I'm almost out of time."
I didn't say anything as she continued to gaze up at the sky a moment.
At last, she slowly turned to face me. All traces of humor were gone, and her expression was more serious than I had ever seen it.
"Soon, you're going to be one of them," she said quietly. "A vampire...monster. But the thing is, you don't have to, Beau. You have other options."
"Jules—" I began, but Jules put up a hand to stop me.
"Just hear me out, okay?" She drew a breath. "I know how you feel about her, Beau. She's the reason you're doing this. But—and I know you already know this—I love you. I love you, and you could choose me instead of her."
Her dark eyes were locked with mine, perfectly clear, and devoid of even the hint of doubt. "I'm saying it now, straight out, because there's too much at stake, and I don't want there to be any misunderstanding."