"We haven't played this one in a while. The boys were young and somehow they always won. I think they cheated, especially since Dave and I didn't let them win."
Carol goes on to tell me the first time Brandon won as she pulls the game out of the gaming cabinet in the living room. The box rattles and shakes as she pulls it down, the loose pieces of the game moving around.
"I'm not sure if any of us even remember how to play it was so long ago. I hope we still have the instructions…" Her voice trails off as she gets lost in her thoughts about the possible location of the directions and the previous times they have played as a family.
Are you still a member of that family? Even after everything that happened? That you put them through?
Even though this is not the first time today that this has happened, I am still surprised by the thoughts plaguing my mind. Why does this keep happening? I know that I am a part of their family. They have told me time and time again since I first stepped through their door. They are glad that I am back and finally safe. Why would they lie to me?
Maybe they feel bad for you. Maybe they even pity you. Poor Rose was kidnapped and repeatedly abused for months.
No. Stop. This isn't real. This is all in my head. None of what my mind is saying is true. If they did not want me here, they wouldn't have been so excited to see me or take the time to plan out a weekend.
"Rose, dear. Are you alright? You seemed to space out for a couple of seconds."
Carol's soothing voice and touch tether me back to reality and away from my mind. I still don't understand why these thoughts keep coming, but I am trying my best not to let them drag me back to the place I was not so long ago.
"Uh, yea. Yes, I am alright. Thank you, Carol. Do you need help setting everything up?"
She gives me a reassuring smile and hands me the box.
"I can read the directions if you can set everything up."
"Perfect."
Opening the box, I was right, there are loose pieces everywhere. Carefully, I dump everything onto the table and set up the board first. That's the easy part. Looking at the box for guidance, I finish setting up the game, making sure everyone can not only reach the board but the pieces too.
Glancing at the setup, I feel satisfied that everyone will be happy with the way it is situated.
Carol looks at the table and then at me, a thankful smile on her face. "That looks great. Would you mind going to get everyone? I am almost done reading the directions."
"Sure."
I find the men still in the kitchen eating the leftovers from the fridge. We only ate two hours ago, but I guess that's enough of a break for them.
"The game is all set up, Carol wants you all in the living room so we can start to play."
Damon looks up at me, a piece of toast in his hand, "what is the game?"
Thinking back, I try to recall the name of the game but realize I never looked at the board, I was more focused on setting it up so we can get started.
"I'm not sure, but Carol said that you all played it once and Brandon won. Carol is reading the directions now."
Brandon looks at all of us, a cocky smile on his face. "I think I know what the game is. Everyone ready to get beat again?"
No one says a word, Damon and Dave look at each other slightly shaking their head before both turning back to look at Brandon. Damon speaks up first, "I doubt you are going to win again, little brother. We both know that I helped you win and now that we have both grown up, this means war."
I'm surprised. I have never seen a competitive, playful side of Damon. He is protective and likes to be in command, but now, he is like a small child trying to win extra dessert after dinner. It's nice to see, it's sweet in an odd, twisted way. They are acting so brotherly.
"Calm down, boys. This is a friendly game and if your mother doesn't remember the directions, then I doubt either of you boneheads does. Let's go see how to actually play this game before anyone bets on them winning as you both have done before." He looks pointedly at the boys before pushing out his chair and walking to the living room.
"I really want to know what he was talking about, but I want to play the game more." Pointing at both of them, "I want to hear the story later though. Maybe the loser will tell me."
Neither of them groans like I expect them to, instead the competitive glint in their eyes shines twofold in a silent challenge between them. I am confident that we will finally see who actually won the game they played all those years ago.
Right as I am about to turn around, both boys turn to look at each other dead in the eye. Their hands grip the table and at the same time, they push out their chairs and race into the living room. I faintly hear one of them call out "I won" as I follow their lead and walk back to where the game is set up.
"Okay, is everyone ready? The rules are simple. Each stack of cards is in a numbered pile. You roll the dice and pick up the card that is in the pile that corresponds to the number you rolled. You then follow that card and either move your avatar forward or back a space, switch places with an opponent, or challenge another opponent to steal their space. The first person to have all of their avatars in their home base wins the game."
Glancing at the board, we each have four avatars in our home base. My avatars are red, Carol's are yellow, Damon's are blue, Brandon's is green, and Dave's avatars are brown. We each take turns rolling the dice to see who will get to go first. Dave gets the highest number of five and begins the game.
"Hmm… I challenge Brandon."
Picking up the dice, I roll them once and come out with a total of 9. Dropping the small cubes into Brandon's hand, he cups his hands together and begins to worldly shake them, speaking to them in a hushed whisper. After a couple more shakes, he opens his hands and we all watch as they roll around the table before finally landing on a six and two.
Seeing his total of eight, Brandon yells "no!" and slams his hands on the table. If I were in his position I would act the same way. He was so close to bringing his first avatar home. However, luckily for me, I'm sitting next to Brandon so my home base is four spots after his putting me in first place with almost two avatars home.
Damon takes the dice next, he rolls and simply moves his avatars forward. He already has one avatar home, similar to me, but his other one is halfway across the board near Dave's home base. Dave rolls the dice and can switch places with an opponent without having to challenge. Being right in front of Damon's home base, he switches with Damon who is set back yet again. This one avatar has now been moved backward three times. It will be a miracle when it makes it back to home base.
Carol goes next and moves forward ten spaces. She also has one avatar home and we have been rivaling for first place the whole game. She is a worthy opponent who has kept me on my toes the whole game.
Finally, Brandon goes. He has to move his avatar back a space which puts him right behind Damon. The boys look back and forth between each other and their pieces. The friendly rivalry is apparent, but Damon knows he is going to beat Brandon. By the end of this game, I think everyone is going to beat Brandon.
Brandon has been a good sport this whole game, but he lightly mumbles under his breath how he can't seem to get his pieces to cooperate in this game. Poor guy.
The game continues on for a couple more rounds before Carol and I are tied with three avatars home. She is winning by one space and my hands tremble slightly as I shake the dice. This is the role that will either declare me victor or put me in second place. I try not to think of the pressure, this is a friendly game after all, but I really want to win.
You can win this game, but you will never win the game of life.
My hands open unexpectedly and drop the dice. They miss the table completely and land on the floor. I sit there unmoving. Seriously? Where do these thoughts keep coming from? What keeps triggering them?
Fighting to escape my thoughts, everyone at the table looks at me with confusion on their faces. Giving them all a shaky smile, I pick up the dice and roll them again. I get a five and Carol wins the game.