I needed the other night with Brandon. He knew exactly how to calm me down and make me feel okay. Even better, he helped me remember him. Having memories back is a blessing and a curse, of course. I remember things I don't want to necessarily remember and it makes me wonder what else I am missing. But, I am grateful to have them back. It fills in some of the blanks that I have been missing.
That night also made me realize that while having a normal routine and rejoining society is beneficial, I need to work on my relationships and get to know those who are close to me again. I am hoping that they will assist me in getting my memories back or at least let me find out why I wanted to hang out with them in the first place. There aren't many people I need to rediscover, only Amelia, really. Well, and Damon. So, I asked Amelia to hang out with me tonight. I'm not sure what we are going to do yet, I was thinking of something simple like bowling or going to a strip mall. She seemed okay with that, but, from what I hear, we went out to a club the first time we really hung out so I don't know if this is her style. We will see.
Jumping into the boys' shower makes me miss when I had my own apartment. I love staying here and all, but the bathroom always smells like a guy, and even when I use my own products, I still smell masculine.
I was devastated when they told me that the landlord ended my contract prematurely because I wasn't there to make the payments. The boys tried to explain the situation, but he wasn't having it. I don't blame them or anyone because, aside from showering, I don't want to be in my apartment by myself. It's nice to be around people all the time and if I ever have a nightmare they are there to help me.
Anyways, stepping out of the shower, I wipe the mirror to get rid of the fog and stare at my reflection. A girl with dull eyes and pale skin stares back at me. She looks lifeless except for the small glimmer of hope and liveliness in her eyes. It's small, but the glimmer is there and it brings me happiness to know that I am getting back to enjoying life and living it to the best of my ability.
Walking into Damon's room which we now share, I open the closet and go through the hangers of my clothes. I pick out black denim jeans paired with a cream-colored blouse with cream-colored slip-on shoes. The outfit is cute, but now I hope we go shopping. This is not the right outfit for bowling. Stepping back into the bathroom, I blow dry my hair and throw it up into a messy bun, a few strands surround my face but the majority is on a knot on the top of my head.
Right on cue, the doorbell rings. Grabbing my purse, phone, and keys, I check through the peephole before opening the door.
"Hey! Are you ready to go out tonight? I can't wait to go shopping. I have been checking online and my mail for coupons and I am so ready to use them tonight!"
"Hey! You came at the perfect time, I just finished getting ready. Do you know what stores you want to check out?"
Walking out of the door and locking it behind me, Amelia tells me about the long list of at least ten stores that she wants to go to. I'm not sure if we will have time for them all, or the energy, but we will certainly try, after all this is my time to get to know her again and I want to take advantage of every minute I spend with her.
The car ride is quick, but she tells me about the first time we met and then the time we went to the club and the boys insisted on coming in case they needed to protect me from her. I don't know why they thought they needed to do that, Amelia seems so harmless.
Pulling into a parking spot, the strip mall seems packed. There are cars everywhere and people litter the parking lot and the sidewalks that connect each store.
"Okay here is the game plan," holding out her fingers she counts each store we are going to stop at until she runs out of all ten.
Getting out of the car, we walk to our right to get to Hollister which is having a winter sale. Manqeuinns line the windows and people are continuously walking out of the revolving doors.
"I know they have a cute top in here. I saw it in the advertisement they sent me."
Walking to the back of the store, we go through each hanger in the clearance section looking for this shirt. I'm not sure why they would advertise things on clearance if they want to make money, but, hey, I'm all up for saving money.
"What about this one?" Facing Amelia, I pull the hanger off the rack and show it to her. I'm not sure what her style is, but it looks like something she would wear based on the outfit she is currently wearing.
"Hmm…" Coming towards me, she takes the hanger out of my hand and presses it against her body after checking both the back and front of the shirt twice. "I like it. Good eye, Rose."
Spending another half hour in the store, we completely raided the clearance section and found the shirt Amelia originally came in for. The bill for three shirts and two pairs of jeans came out to $60 and I feel like I just won the lottery.
Stopping into another store, Amelia tells me a bit about her childhood and why she works in finances. Her father was an accountant and she grew up around money and numbers. She feels comfortable in them, she says that they are the only reliable thing in this world if recorded correctly. Aside from work, she likes to hang out with friends and let loose whether that is going to a party or having a quiet night in; anything that can help alleviate the stress that the day may bring.
Once the sun started to go down we decided to stop shopping and go out to eat with whatever money we had left.
She decided to take us to this small Italian restaurant that was family-owned for over forty years. Walking into the restaurant, chatter greets my ears. There are families talking and laughing, a baby squealing in joy. The sound is wonderful, and slightly deafening which can be good.
When the host sees us, he doesn't seem surprised by our presence but amused almost.
"Back again?"
"How could I not? My favorite people work here." Amelia has a smile on her face and happiness swimming in her eyes.
Laughing, the host gathers our menus and guides us to our table. It is away from the rest of the patrons, but still close enough so we can faintly hear them talking.
"Is that your boyfriend? You both seemed friendly."
"Gosh no. I have a boyfriend." Her smile disappears from her face, sadness coating her features. Did something happen to him? Did I already know that she had a boyfriend?
Perking back up, she lightens the mood. "I have known that guy since I came here for undergrad. It has been, what, 6 years now, I think. He is my best friend and I am close to his family. That's why I come here so much, well, aside from the food being delicious."
Eating dinner, we easily chatted about what she did the last couple of months and she told me about the times we spent together before everything happened. She was so descriptive and I felt like I was there. I mean, I was, but I can't remember it.
She told me about her boyfriend, and how they met. She was glowing as she spoke about him. Even with their miscommunication and him being away, her love for him never faded and now it was shining through. Her happiness was blinding.
As we were leaving the restaurant, she hugged the host goodbye and told him to tell everyone that she said hello. He nodded his head and said he would. They may be best friends, but the way he stared after her as we walked out the door told me otherwise. He wanted to be something more than just friends.
The car ride is short, our voices filling the small space for the majority of the time. The windows are rolled up, but I can imagine the breeze going through my hair and the smell of the fresh air drifting through the car. I smile, it may be winter, but I can imagine my own summer if I try hard enough.
Amelia walks me up to my door, telling jokes along the way. She's very funny and outgoing. I don't know why we became friends, but I am glad we did. She didn't stay for long, only enough to say hello to the boys, who were both home, before we hugged and I thanked her for today. I was right, reigniting my relations are an important piece to getting my life back.