Amber's mom stabilized, showed strong vitals under the circumstances, all week I had made my way into the hospital to visit the kids and Amber's mom those kids grieving their friend are remarkable helping each other, their spirit of compassion and cooperation can put some adults to shame, those sweet kids did crafts and made cards for Amber's mom for me to take up, each day, it put lovely smiles on their faces to share.
Each day Amber and her mom smiled and came down briefly to say thank you and reciece hugs, it seemed very fitting for them to receive the news of a hospice space open for Monday at Cloud Villa, set up like a hotel with hospital equipment, to live out your remaining days in style, messages, swims, hot tub, sauna, lovely gardens and more, it was one of the best in compassion care and reassurance in support to families dealing with everything.
I went with Amber for the tour, it had large rooms set up as hotel style rooms, big bed with hospital equipment as required by individuals, 30 rooms in total, the grounds well looked after and peaceful, you could book time for a family swim or party if you wanted it a little more private but want we saw was everyone being more like one big family.
The children were excited for the two of them that and give a big group hug, Amber's mom had grown fond of that little group of friends on that ward and dropped a hint at the doctor that if some of them could some come visit.
Told Dad when he came back from the cafeteria, he seemed thrilled too.
Felt like days had been moving faster, Monday came and went, moved in Amber's mom, helped get her settled, visited the kids and learned some are going home soon, a week flew by going from hospital to hospice while also staying focused on my phyiso on my own, swimming after breakfast hospice visit before lunch, return home for lunch and work out visit kids in the afternoon and home for social media attention and yes some where in the days starting to feel faster was Daniel's memorial service were I had been asked to speak.
It wasn't easy basically I read out the letter he gave me followed by this letter I wrote in reply.
Dearest New Angel
Thank you for the detailed planning you and your family gave me just before your passing, it was impressive the amount of thought you had been able to put into it after my visit, I really didn't know you well and I wish that could have been different, I would have loved to help you in getting involved in racing, I feel so grateful that you were and may still be one of my biggest fans.
I don't fully know your illness story, but know you fought for the life you had, what a witnessed on my visits was a compassionate young leader caring and supportive of the other young patients, what I saw was a gentle strength that was wise beyond your years.
Your spirit and faith an incredible light extguisted to soon.
I must point out that I feel a bit guilty standing here saying goodbye to you today, when all hope had been after your transplant you would once again laugh and play, I am sorry you witnessed my crush live and that I am here and you are not.
I will put your plan to good use, it will take a little time but I know it will get you smiling up in heaven.
I am grateful for what little time I did get to know you, your inspiration and in many ways something I hope will become a fitting legacy.
Till we meet again Daniel, may you rest in peace like you lead in example of living in peace.
I didn't see any dry eyes in the crowd from what I could tell when I had looked up from reading what was my final draft of the letter, keep in mind maybe it was because I was looking through tears myself.
I can't really complain, even if I don't get back to racing I got a chance to touch the lives of these youth, I have been able to make a new friend, a life time friend and brother is home and to me those little girls are nieces, I truly am blessed for the life I have.
What was left of the month was spent visiting Amber and her mom, making sure I got some great photos of the two of them, Amber was driving me more then my dad, our friendship was growing and maybe it could be one sided but I think I feel some sparks.
Now really isn't the time to ask, so I will just keep being here for her.
They had two months together every day in Cloud Villa, the staff amazing at their jobs of providing comfort and dignity, when Amber had left the room just two days before her mom's death, her mom said "Son, I noticed the way you have been looking at her, and that you're here supporting us emotionally but, boy don't wait to long if you have discovered you are having feelings for her, I can feel I'm going soon, and you got a second chance, Don't blow it, your a good man, it looks like you make her happy, not sure why you seem afraid to love someone, loving her dad isn't a regret."
It was just Amber and a nurse with her when she passed, I felt myself wishing I had been there, but Amber had permission to stay over night as she had felt it wouldn't be long herself, she noticed the change in breathing and rang for the nurse so they could make her as comfortable as possible, ironically or beautifully which ever way you see it, her death occurred at 11:11pm, 11:11 am or pm is seen as a heavenly time, one that when noticed is said to bring blessings.