I dashed quickly as it moved past me but the other guys caught up with it and that was how we killed our very first snake in Love Ghetto. Well, I actually didn't join them to kill it, my CSO John was shielding me all along. That was the first time I had ever seen a snake live as per the proper "Kumerica Boy" I was. I called the mysterious girl later that night and we got talking. "Hello" I said as she picked up.
"Hi there, you're actually very lucky you called tonight, else she replied
"Else what?" I asked with a chuckle
"Lemme not talk" she responded. Her diction was spot on. "Okay, so how was your day?" I asked "Well, it was normal, nothing much, all I had to do was some house chores and then study for upcoming tests" "Where's your hostel?" I asked because not so many students had gotten hostels here yet, some of them still come all the way from Koforidua daily to school and I prayed and hoped she wasn't among those. She laughed and replied
"actually no I don't, I stay with my mums junior sister in the next town so I have to come down to school from there daily ". That was so much stress and I knew it.
"waoh, how do you cope with the stress and the distance?" I further asked
"well, its been kind of stressful but I've gotten used to it, besides I'm getting my
own hostel soon enough" she answered
"If you need any help looking for houses and to make choices, you could let me
know ifl could be of help" I added . "Sure definitely, I didn't know you were an estate agent too" she joked and I laughed and replied. "Anything for the gorgeous lady".
"Gorgeous lady you say abi" she laughed out so loud, "You have no idea how l
look like Stylish". She was right, I actually shouldn't have said that but as a sharp
nigga, I laughed and responded. "To be completely honest and factual right now, your looks don't matter any more.." "Tell me something I don't know" she interjected. l scoffed and continued
"I'm actually serious, you exude beauty in your words, diction and audible countenance". She was amused by my use of lexicons but I could tell she wasn't swayed by my words. "Audible countenance, Eiiii Stylish" she said amidst her laughter. "What does that even mean?" she asked. "I swear I don't know" I responded sharply and began laughing with her. "Lest I forget, how was the assignment?" I had forgotten to tell her.
"Guess what I scored?" I asked. "Hmmm, 30/20 right?" she boldly chuckled. "Is that even possible?" I responded with a manly giggle. "Yo man, I knew what I solved there and it was quality, don't blame me for being too over confidence".She was cocky and I loved it, slightly over
confidence but in a good way. I smiled and took a deep breath before responding.
"Actually you got all the questions right, and I scored 20/20" "You're welcome" she responded "and prepare me a package when next we see". I burst into laughter and replied "No problemo Prof"
I had this thought lingering in my head all day and decided I was going to ask
her.
"Can I ask for a favour please?" "Sure, you can" She responded.
"Alright, would you mind being my tutor in mathematics for a while, I seem to
suck at it but I'm sure with your tutelage, I could improve" I asked. She took a
pause before responding. "Hmmmm, let me see, are you sure this is not a trick into making sure we spend more time together?". Damn, she was smart and l chuckled. "Its actually for the academic benefits and any other pleasurable benefits that accrues with it is a plus" I responded and she laughed. "Alright then I'll think about it". Just then I decided to check my phone and I noticed Jane was calling. My phone had been beeping for a while but I never checked till now. Jane had been calling all through. I knew I had to pick her call. "Okay, thanks, Hmmm, can I call you back, I want to do something sharply, 5 minutes" ."By the way I'm Angela" she said
"Okay Angie talk to ya later then."
"okay then" she responded, "5 minutes"
I hung up to call Jane and noticed I had missed her call 5 times. I called her
back and I had to apologize to her. She asked who I was with on the phone and
I said it was my Dad. She bought it hook, line and sinker. We ended up talking on the phone for 15 minutes and as we we're speaking, the only thing on my mind was Angela. I couldn't hurry up the call and I had to play along. By the time I hung up and tried to call Angela back, her number was switched off, I saw a notification that she had a sent a text ten minutes ago. I
looked at the text and muttered "fuck!". It was a short text. "5 minutes? its been 10, bad move tiger"
Monday morning came and l dialled her number as soon as I woke up, it rang
but she didn't pick. I had messed up again, for the second time in a row. All through my lectures, I was not focused as l was bothered. All I think of was her. It was funny because I couldn't picture her face but I had this mental image of a beautiful creature in my mind. I was so lost in thoughts that l was oblivious
of everything around me. I felt a jab on my ribs and I screamed out, it was Mark.
"Prof dey follow you talk". What the hell, I was in Class, an accounting course and
I had wandered so far away. The whole class was looking at me and I stood up. I
had no idea what was going on.
"Young man, answer the question". l was in trouble and I knew it. A couple of my
mates were already laughing and even Mark had put his hands on his face.
"Sir, could you please repeat the question again for clarity?". He looked at me with contempt and anger. "I should repeat the question, maybe today I'll make an example of you, come to the front of the class". Everybody in class mumured instantly in pity for me. "Presido, wahala de" Ivan said as I walked past him while he was humming a laughter in sympathy. I knew I was done for this was Professor Okraku, a renowned professor in Economics, he was in fact on sabbatical leave from OAU and was borrowed for a short term in our department. In as much as I could sense I was in trouble, I was slightly confident because I had a good knowledge of accounting. l only just wished the question or questions he had asked was something I had prior knowledge of.
I walked to front of the class and faced my course mates. They were all looking at me as if I was just about to be slaughtered. The whole class room was melancholic and the ambiance was plaintive. Professor Okraku walked up to me and put his hands on my shoulders while speaking to the class. "What I hate most as a teacher is for me to be teaching in class and notice students not paying attention, its so uncalled for!! The primary purpose for you being in school is to learn and it is your utmost duty to honour that.." I swallowed a spit and my heart began to beat very fast. "..this young man over here, err, what is your name?" he asked.
"My name is Micheal Sir, Olaoluwa" I responded clearly scared. He gave me slap at the back and I let out a muted scream. "When I ask you for your name, you give me your full name, is that clear!?"
"Yes sir! my name is Micheal, Micheal Anoye" I responded.l could see some girls laughing at this sight. I was being made a mockery of and they were laughing.
Damn all of them laughing. I was totally embarrassed and my self esteem was
weakening. "This was all Angela's fault" I thought to myself, "If she hadn't been
angry at me for not calling her back in exactly five minutes, this wouldn't be
happening". Just then another thought rushed in, " It's not Angela's, it's Jane's, if
she hadn't wasted so much time talking to me on the phone, we would have
hung up the call earlier and I would have been on time with Angela". It was more
of a scenario where your good and bad conscience was talking to you. One
would be dressed as an angel on your right shoulder and another as a demon on
your left side.
"So I'm going to be asking you series of questions on what I've been teaching
today and if you miss one question, you would not write my test next week,
consider 20 marks gone" He further continued. I knew I was finished. What was with all these Professors making their courses and classes hellish? Was this a
trend? to be obnoxiously wicked? "But, to make this more interesting,..." He added, I was shaking, "what else for goodness sake" I thought.
"If peradventure you were to get all questions right, you won't write my test, in
fact you would have passed my test without even writing, and I'll accord you full marks for not writing". This man was already gambling with my destiny. Everybody in class was already murmuring and whispering to each other. I looked at Ivan and he was just shaking his head and smiling. I closed my eyes and thought, "Stylish, you're very very foolish, this isn't Angela's fault, neither is it Jane's, its my own fault for being gullible enough to bring my emotional problems to class". "Are you ready Mr Micheal ?" Prof asked as he stepped away and took his handout to peruse for questions. "Excuse me sir, I'm sorry, lam actually not feeling fine .....
"Will you shut up!!!" He interjected sternly, "Do you think I'm joking here? do I look like Akrobeto or Lil Win?" The whole class went silent, nobody said a word and only then did we all see the seriousness of this scenario. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I stood in front of my mates. Some of them had their mouths opened wide in amazement and I could see Ivan put his hands on his head. I wiped off my tears and waited for his questions.
There was surely no escapism for me right now. I was on my own, fighting this
battle by myself. I looked round the class and I could feel every single soul there praying for me in their hearts. I noticed a female figure looking on from outside by the window. Her presence was oblivious to everyone as they were all focused on me. "I'm going to ask you five questions, answer all correctly and you win this wager". "Okay Sir" I responded with a teary sniff. "Question 1, define fixed expense, variable expense, accrued expense and operational expenses" The whole class screamed. "aahhhhhhhhh"
l was in tears, not because of the questions, but because I was embarrassed. | always hated being embarrassed or being ridiculed as l was never a tough guy, I actually was a tad emotional. For like a minute I said nothing and my head was hung down in shame. As I brought my head up to answer the question, someone from the class stood up and spoke and we were amazed. "Please sir, have mercy. As you can see he's remorseful and sorry, no need for all these sir, he's already crying". The whole class looked behind and watched him speak. They were all amazed at who had that audacity. I smiled as I watched him, and my mental strength began to pick up. Who else had that effusive audacity to jawbone the Professor other than my very good friend Ivan. I felt so proud and a rush of energy burst through my veins. I knew I had found a friend for life. It was a beautiful sight. I knew how much of a conundrum it must have been for him to shoulder that responsibility and speak up. "Young man, what is your name?". We all were focused on Ivan's bravery that we neglected the Professor's response. "My name is Ivan Oklu Sir" he replied boldly. The class was beginning to come alive again as we all thought we were winning this fight. "What region are you from Ivan?" "I'm from Volta Region Sir" he replied again. "Waoh, really?" the Professor said as he stood up, "I am also from Volta region and I must say you are a disgrace to us all". Everyone went silent again and we all knew it, Ivan was as fucked as l was. "Come to the front, Idiotl". Amidst the murmurs and silent whispers, he walked up to the front and stood beside me. He leaned over and whispered to my ear, "Don't worry bro,l dey with you, we're together in this". He didn't have to do this but yet he did. This was my personal cross and he chose to carry it with me. "Very well then", the Prof spoke.
"Now we have an interesting scenario here, Since Mr Ivan here has decided to be a Mandela and save his friend, l have decided to put him also on the same wager as I put Mr Micheal. They are in this together". The whole class screamed again "Aaaaaahhhhh". "Silence!!!!!!" and they all shussed.
"Mr Ivan here would be a successor to Mr Michael. Michael would start answering the questions and if he misses one, then it falls on Ivan to answer the question..".
This was trouble, I knew if any of those questions that I didnt know fell to Ivan,
he would not be able to answer it also, but I really didn't care anymore. He was beside me now, he gave me strength and l was prepared to do anything to make sure we survived this. If they both fail to answer-just one question correctly, then the wager is lost. Any more sound from anybody esle, you would join them and I would increase the questions. Is that clear?!!" We all responded that we understood and the class went silent again. "Mr Micheal, I believe you were about to answer question 1" My confidence was back and I had cleaned my tears away, Ivan stood beside me and held my hands. "Stylish, we can do this, don't fret" he said to me and my boldness was recharged. "Sir, could you please repeat the question again" "You must be very stupid! you have two minutes to answer". I closed my eyes and decided to play back the question. What most people
didn't know was that I had an eidetic memory, I could easily recall things from the past vividly and in details. Just then, I opened my eyes and began to speak.
"Fixed expenses are payments like rent that occurs in a regularly scheduled cadence. Variable expenses are expenses like labor costs, that may change in a given time period. Accrued expenses are incurred expenses that hasn't been paid yet while Operation expenses are business expenditures not directly associated with the production of goods and services for example, advertising
costs, property taxes or insurance expenditures". The whole class was shocked, even Ivan looked at me with his side eye and whispered and smiled. "Eiii so you know book like this". I smiled. The Professor looked at his handout clearly dumbfounded. He had pictured me as dumb but clearly he was going to find out that I had tricks up my sleeves. "Correct!!!" he reluctantly declared. The whole class burst into rounds of
applause and cheers and I felt so proud.
"Question 2!" and the class went silent again. "God please, let it be something I know again" as I closed mv eyes.
"What does ROI stands for and explain it". I took a deep breath, opened my eyes and spoke. "ROI which means Return on Investment is a measure used to evaluate the financial performance relative to the amount of money that was invested." "And how is it calculated?" He asked again to quite certain I was sure. "The ROI is calculated by dividing the net profit by the cost of the investment and most times, the result is often expressed as a percentage". The whole class went silent again as they awaited the Professor's verdict. He left his seat and walked to the centre. He stood in front of us with a confused look and smiled. "Correct again!" The whole class burst into applause and cheers again. Some
went wild by even beating the tables.
"Question 3!" .Gradually the noise was thinning down. I closed my eyes again. I
blocked out any thought of Jane or Angela. Their thoughts was what put me into this mess in the first instance.
"What is accrual accounting?"
I smiled and shook my head. He was looking at me this time around, right in the
eye to see where I was conjuring up the answers from. I stared right back at
him and answered.
"Accrual accounting right? Well, it is the attempt to record the financial effects of
transactions and other events in the periods in which those transactions or
events occur rather than only in the periods in which cash is received or paid by the business, using all the techniques available to implore the matching principle". "Goodness lord!!!!" somebody screamed among my course mates. I could hear them murmuring and smiling. Their countenance had changed and it was a friendly and soothing atmosphere once again. Professor Okraku was dumbfounded and overwhelmed. He walked up to my face utterly surprised and spoke to me slowly and crystal clearly. "Young man, l have never made mention of the matching principle, in fact you're not due to learn about this till your second semester, but if you can explicitly expatiate at length and rather not be breviloquent in your explanations with examples, I promise you, not only will you win this wager but I'll personally see to it that you have 30 marks each in your CA, all you have to fight for is the remaining 10. Please explain to us all, the matching principle". He took a few paces backwards and looked at us.
"Stylish, say you know am?" Ivan asked me I looked at him and answered "not really, but I'll try" "I get idea too but make you go first". I looked around and all eyes were on me. The girl watching from the window was still there, smiling at the display she was witnessing. l was sweating this time around. I knew my excessive show of knowledge would
put me in trouble. I could easily have avoided using that term and still answer the question correctly but I did that just to show off. I slapped my forehead and began to speak.
"Matching principle is a fundamental concept in basic accounting that states that in any given period, you should try to match the revenue you are reporting with the expenses it took to generate that revenue in the same time period or over the periods in which you will be receiving benefits from that expenditure" Every one was stunned. I wasn't sure if I got it right but with the look the Professor was exuding, I could tell I was slightly correct. He was floored, we had beat him at his game. He was a 60 year old man in his suits and polished shoes being floored by a 20 year old in a customised Manchester united jersey, a jean trouser and sneakers.
"You still haven't given me an example yet" he spoke trying to form a deadpan look but I could read him, we had him by his balls, hahaha. I tried to answer that but Ivan held me back and said "Presido, make I answer this one, make e no look as if l be jon". "Ivan" l whispered, "If you miss it, we are done for, do you realise that?
"Bro, no be only you know book" he whispered back to me as he took a step
further to respond. "A simple example sir is depreciation expense. lfyou buy a building that would last for many years, you don't write off that building all at once. Instead you take depreciated deductions over the building's estimated useful life. Thus you have matched the expense or cost of the building with the benefit it produces over the course of the years it will be in service. Thank you sir".
My mouth was wide open. "What the hell did Ivan just come up with?" I thought
to myself. I wasn't so sure if he was correct but the way he answered it with passion and his confidence was mind blowing. l was proud. We bumped our fists together and stood confidently in front of the Professor. There were shouts of excitement from different angles in the class as they all knew we were correct. Most of them had their phones and were googling the answers as we were being asked. 'I swear they get am" I heard one guy whisper to another. The whole class was preparing to enter a frenzy mode and joyous mode.
'Silence!!!" the Professor exclaimed and the whole class went into total silence. He
stared at us both for like 15 seconds and for those seconds we were both scared. He could tell us we were wrong and there was nothing we could do. He was the teacher and judge.
He took a few paces forward and just then, he dropped his handout on a table a
and he began to slowly clap.
'kpa! kpa! kpa!" his hands began to sound and just then two other students joined in and in seconds the whole class was on their feets with series of cheers and applause and screams. We had won our wager. I gave Ivan a big hug right where we stood and l was shedding tears. "Thank you so much Ivan" I said with a teary eye. 'Brother for life, l've gat you, any day any time, we did this, you did this, this is your moment" he replied back as we both took a bow and went to our seats. The professor walked up to the front on the class and began to speak.
"I must say I am very very flabbergasted and bewildered by these two young
men. You both are doing well and please keep it up. You've won your wager."
The class burst into applause again.