Wang Min Jun possessed too many aspects in his life which he was proud of and happy about. Self-control was one among them. But he realized one thing new that day. The fragile guy sitting on his thigh had the power to take the self-control with his frail-bony hand and play it like a toy only to break it. It was not like Min Jun was not against that idea.
But he knew it shouldn't happen. He was messed up beyond redemption. He was not relationship material. At least not at the moment. After the conversation with BB last night, he realized he should work on his lifestyle if he wants to stay grounded and not continue with unhealthy ways to manage his existential crisis.
All his resolve and determination to not getting intimate with anyone or form a romantic relationship was in question the minute he walked into the room. The half-naked guy in the bed getting a sponge bath... He was not the gorgeous guy or the most handsome man. But there was something that made him keep his eye on the skinny guy who was his best friend's cousin.
Nope! He was not turned on, but something stirred in his heart. His heart squeezed, looking at the thin figure painfully. The Dom in him wanted to wrap him in a blanket, hide him from the evilness in the world and feed till the bones have more muscle added to it. But he knew he couldn't. He shouldn't. It was the promise he gave BB. He will fix himself and his mess before he thinks about his head about continuing his lifestyle or not.
He still didn't know how he was able to utter a word and enquire 'Where was Chin Hae Hyung?' He was glad that he didn't become a blabber-ing mess in front of the frail beauty. He was not a person to get tongue-tied. But something about Young Jae just draws him closer and messes his head only to render him at the loss of the words.
It was not lust. It was something more. Something that held more power to break him. Something that weighed heavy on his heart. But he didn't know what it was... He couldn't give a name to the feeling.
When the house help was about to be called for carrying the beauty to another place, he didn't want to pass up the opportunity. He knew, after a week, they would never come across each other. If luck favours, they might meet in the near future, and he thought he should grab the chance to be close to Moon Young Jae.
The name, Moon Young Jae, he heard a lot in the last few days from the twins and baby-doll. He was intrigued about him the frail beauty even before meeting him. He overheard the conversation when Chin Hae Hyung told Kang Chin Mae that Young Jae has put on weight and looks more healthy than before.
'So how thin and unhealthy was this guy before?' was all he could think of when he carried him the first time. But the second time he carried him back, his entire focus was on the guy in the arm. He felt the bone pricking him like a thorn.
Young Jae was way too thin for an almost 21-year-old healthy lad. The 19-year-old Min Jun was buffier and taller than him by a couple of inches. Min Jun was not a man with a well-built muscle. He was a healthy late teenager who had strong muscle due to playing way too many sports. Min Jun never realized that he and everyone in his family were tall inherently. He was 190 cm (6ft 3in). Young Jae was 175 cm (5ft 9in) which was above average height for Korean men.
Even though Min Jun made sure Young Jae not to get any more injured in the fall, he ended up hurting. Not physically! Violently beating heart, the guy who made his heartbeat like crazy in his arm and couldn't do anything but more lying flushed against each other and the bonus of unexpected teeth grazes on the shoulder just near the neck were damaging his sanity. The warmth near his neck was distracting him from reality, and wanting the minute to continue forever.
Thankfully the door opened, and Chin Hae entered only to leave in a minute after sprouting some non-sense.
Min Jun was frustrated. He wanted to hold Chin Hae and yell at him. 'How could you even leave your cousin with someone he never even knew? What do you mean by apologizing and asking me to continue? Is overthinking is the only work your peanut brain capable of doing? Do you even care about your cousin?'
Instead of saying all that he settled for "Overthinking-Babo! Get your useless ass here! im-ma!"
After a few minutes he clearly heard Chin Hae saying "From Hyung, I dropped down to little shit just because I walked in on you? Can't you let it slide as I am trying to give you space?" And then the man-child in the question entered the room with the look of guilt and wronged written all over his face.
When Min Jun saw the face, Chin Hae was making he didn't know what to do. Scold him for overthinking again? or get mad at Chin Hae for leaving his cousin to a man like himself? or share the emotional mess created by the culprit in arms to the culprit's cousin.
"Be careful of whatever that was near the foot of the bed and come over to help me safely move your cousin back to bed!" Min Jun said calmly even though his heart was a mess.
He didn't want Chin Hae to trip and fall over them. But then there was little reluctant to leave the guy sitting on his thigh awkwardly at the point. Without knowing, he squeezed Young Jae's hip a little, in a reassurance... towards Young Jae or himself, no one knew at the moment, The lack of meat was evident but his heart ticked with a feeling he felt long back in school… when he had his first crush…
That was long back, and he was over it. After all his crush was straight, when he confessed, his crush rejected him politely. They became best friends later. Min Jun had his share of bending a couple of straight men, but all of it involved constant seducing, forming bond leading to curiosity and then consent. He did it because he wanted to, and at the same time, he never pushed past anyone's boundaries. But he vowed himself that he wouldn't do it anymore.
It made Min Jun wonder what would be the little bunny on his lap's sexual orientation. He hoped his gaydar was still working fine and lead him to a paradise. He was willing to ache alone if his gaydar messed up for the first time in the last five years but will not put this bunny through any trouble.
After all, he was willing to make himself better to have this little bunny in his life and make little bunny's life happy.