Chereads / I don't trust you enough / Chapter 37 - Chapter XXXVII (Vanessa POV)

Chapter 37 - Chapter XXXVII (Vanessa POV)

This is the fourth and last POV I am introducing.

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I unlocked the apartment. Aron lifted his eyes and hello-ed me with a quiet voice. It was his day off and as always he spent it in his largest, oldest, probably the smelliest tracksuit he owned. I breathed out, knowing that I'll be wiping that easy smile of his face in about a second.

"Listen Ar," he immediately moved his legs so I could sit on the couch too, "I ran Lukas's number as you asked, but it didn't pan out. I couldn't locate it in any way. It's either turned off or the number is no longer in service. Basically, there is no way he can be found like this."

He tried hiding the disappointment. It has been almost a month since he asked me for the favour, which would mark more than two months of Lukas's absence. I procrastinated doing this mostly because I wanted to postpone this exact moment. He saddened and me feeling like a letdown.

"Oh, that's uh...thanks for trying."

He stood up and went into his room. I could hear a slightly depressing melody coming from it. He has been playing the piano more and more each week. I would usually enjoy it, but sad circumstances prevented me from doing that.

For someone who always insisted on talking through the problems, he was incredibly adamant about suffering alone! Every time I try to make him open up when he is like this, he either ignores me or blows up in my face.

And he has been avoiding talking about Lukas at all costs. This is probably the first time we mentioned him in almost a month. I knew his absence hit him hard. Abandonment is usually something either Spencer siblings can't handle very well.

It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that Aron got attached to the brown-haired charmer. I hated that he was upset because of him, but not as much as I detested knowing I can't do anything about it, except give Aron space and hoping his partner returns soon.

I put my laptop in the drawer and noticed dust on my bookshelf.

Oh no. This is terrible.

I really let my cleaning habits go. I opened my drawer with cleaning supplies when my phone rang. The phone number wasn't identified, but I knew it. I haven't seen it on my phone screen in quite a while.

"Hello, Vanessa," the deliciously accented voice made my ears tingle.

"Hi."

He didn't say anything for a moment and I could tell he was driving. He wasn't a reckless person, but this was one stupid habit he indulged in.

"I need your help."

My stomach almost folded in on itself.

"With what?"

"My father thinks someone hacked into our private family server and until we figured out who did it or if there was a breach at all, we are not allowed to use it. Which is not ideal right now."

"And how do you figure that someone accessed your private system?"

"The server detected the intrusion, but it has been wrong before and I would just like to double-check if someone copied or stole anything. Just to be safe."

I sat down on my bed.

"You have the whole security team, why not..."

"Because it could have been any of them and we can't trust them with this right now."

"But you trust me?"

He sighed.

"With this, right now, you are the only one that I do trust yes."

A small smile formed on my face.

"I don't think your family..."

"My family  wants nothing more than for this to be over. But yeah you should prepare for...comments."

I wanted to say no, but I felt like I owed him. After everything I put him through, this was the least I could do.

"Alright. Where is the server?"

"Home."

If I didn't feel dread before, I definitely did now.

"Right, of course."

"Do you still know where it is?"

"Unless the Mansion moved, yes I still do."

"Good. See you tomorrow. At five?"

"Five."

We hung up without a goodbye. I laid back and rested my head on my pillow. I shut my eyes as tightly as I could and tried to make sense of the situation I just found myself in. Going to help the family of my ex that absolutely hates me was a terrific idea.

My mind was a storm right now, different disastrous scenarios filling every corner of my brain threatening to drown me in a swarm of panic. But then the music from the neighbouring room pulled me back just enough to compose myself and realize that I am not backing down from this. I can't. So I stood up, opened my laptop and began preparing everything I needed for tomorrow.

X

I rang the doorbell. Calling it a doorbell honestly sounds silly. It's more of a gatesbell. I expected the face of their butler to greet me, but instead, there was the youngest Fitzalan-Howard son. I was 100% certain he shooed the butler away just so he would be the one to open it. He leaned against the door frame nonchalantly.

"Oh look, the cheating bitch is here. Fun."

"Just a bitch today huh? You've gone soft Theodore."

His head tilted closer to me.

"Believe me, if my parents weren't in the next room, I would've used much stronger language."

I didn't move. And he just kept glaring. He was probably the only person on earth that could make chocolate brown eyes seem cold.

That was when, to my relief, Levi decided to show up and invited me in. We passed the living room where his parents and older sister were sitting Mr and Ms Fitzalan-Howard didn't even spare me a glance, while Clark did the exact opposite and started shooting daggers at me the second I stepped into the room. I couldn't blame any of them. If a girl cheated on my brother or son I know I would've treated her the same way if not worse.

Levi showed me the way to the server room which was located in the basement. For a second I thought that there was no computer problem, that this was just some elaborate plan to lock me down here and torture me. But I quickly let go of that idea. If this family decided to take revenge on me they would have found much more horrible ways and a long time ago.

I connected my computer to their server. He stepped back and locked the doors. There was no need for me to ask since told me immediately.

"I know you don't like interruptions while working and I am not risking Clark or Theo barging in here."

I smiled slightly and thanked him.

It took almost no time at all to find the intruder. They weren't too careful.

"Levi I found them."

He stood up from the floor and leaned over my shoulder. His proximity still makes me tingle. His breath was on my neck.

"You can delete the trace of their presence right?"

I turned to him. He didn't move.

"Yes, but don't you want to know who it was first?"

"I don't care."

"You should."

I broke the eye contact and focused back on my computer screen, ignoring the intensely fast beating of my heart.

"Here is the IP address."

"You really don't need...."

"But it's a cloaking one."

"Does-does that mean you can't trace it?"

He was acting strange. His accent always got a lot stiffer when he got nervous.

"Of course I can. Cloaking IPs aren't really that hard to crack."

"I told you, you don't need to do that!"

I stopped my fingers from tipping, while his went through his hair repeatedly. I cocked my head to the side, taking him in. He never could lie. His body language betrayed him before his words could.

"It was you wasn't it?"

His eyes lifted to find mine. He didn't even try to deny it. I closed my eyes and groaned.

"What did you think I won't figure it out?"

He shook his head: "I hoped you wouldn't, but I...I asked you because I knew you won't tell."

The silence was tense. It was like he was asking me if I won't tell on him without actually asking. I guess silent communication between us was something that survived the breakup.

"How did you manage to even do that? I remember once having to assist you with illegally downloading a video game."

"I paid a guy and he got me this program on a USB that should have breached the firewall undetected. I guess I paid too much."

I wasn't even that surprised. Maybe I should have been, but I wasn't.

"Ok. Why?"

"Can you wipe any footprints that I left first. Please."

I nodded. It was almost nothing to erase so I was finished in like five minutes.

I repeated my previous question.

He was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall. He brushed through his hair again. He let out a grunt in frustration and buried his face in his hands.

"Because I was sick of me being the only one that didn't know what was happening with his own damn engagement!"

My stomach felt like it filled with lead.

"And," I cleared my troath "what did you find out?"

"That I am supposed to go to this charity event with her. Oh and that they are planning the wedding for next summer."

The lead got even heavier.

"And how is Sarah?"

He chuckled: "You know perfectly well it's Sandra."

I did know. I smirked slightly.

"And please don't say beautiful, smart and funny. That just shows how little you know the person."

He laughed. Harder this time. I never forgot how much I loved his laugh. It was so much more than just simply dashing.

The thing is, all Fitzalan-Howard siblings were dashingly handsome. Theodore with his cheekbones that were higher than his bank statement and Clark who was one of the most beautiful women I ever laid my eyes on. But Levi was something else entirely. His features were softer and eyes warmer than those of his brother and his hair slightly fairer and straighter than his sister's, all of which accumulated in the gorgeous appearance of the man sitting beside me, now watching me intently.

"Well, she is a book editor and lives in Dublin where she was born. She is an only child and will one day inherit a massive fortune."

"It's like you are reading her autobiography."

"We didn't really go on any dates so the autobiography might actually come in handy."

I didn't smile, because his expression showed me how sad that actually made him. I felt sorry for him. Arranged marriage is so medieval and yet it's still happening. But I also felt guilty. His whole family accepted me with open arms. Probably counting on us getting married on day and even though I wasn't anywhere near their social class, they would be ok with it. Happy even. But no, I had to go and screw everything up.

"I am so sorry."

This was the first time in this conversation that he turned his face to me.

"It's not your fault."

"It feels like it."

He didn't respond.

"Will you ever be able to forgive me."

He gave me one of those smiles that he always used when I was upset to calm me down. It still worked.

"I already have."

I returned the small smile and a huge weight fell off my shoulders. His family didn't, but honestly, that didn't matter to me as much as him not hating me did.

The silence was tense again, but this time it was...familiar.

"I heard your brother's back. Engaged right?"

"Yes. To a harp player."

"Not surprising."

"I honestly had my money that it would be a violinist."

He laughed again.

"How's Clark doing?"

"Ignoring mom's attempts at talking about finding her a man and working."

"Theodore?"

"You can call him Theo you know."

"I lost that privilege."

He blinked, surprised.

"My brother really isn't a forgiving type huh?"

"I think you are the only forgiving type in your family."

"I might be."

We were looking at each other. Everything went silent and my mouth dry as I glanced at his lips. I didn't know who started leaning first, but when our lips met it didn't matter. It's been so long, but he still knew all the right things to do. His hand caressed my cheek and my hands went around his neck. I broke the kiss to take a breath and it cleared my mind a little.

"We shouldn't do this," I whispered unconvincingly.

"Yeah."

His voice was raspy and sexy as hell. I kissed him again and this time it was a lot more intense. I trace my tongue over his bottom lip and he opened his mouth immediately. My hands were in his hair while his arms were now around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I was straddling his lap now. His hands roamed my body as I was pressed firmly to his.

Everything felt so good and so freaking right. I wished it didn't because then I would be able to realize what a huge mistake we were making.

But now, with my tongue in his mouth and his hands on my ass, I simply didn't have it in me to regret it.