"SAY Nigel, why do you want to learn this language?" Mavy asked in her lower voice as she closed her book.
We are currently here inside the school library studying her language. It's been 3 months since I asked her to teach me Filipino. I already know her name and some facts about her.
Her name is Maria Ivy Dela Cruz, Mavy for short. She's under the scholarship of some businessman where her mother works as a maid. She's 17 years old and currently on her 12th year. She said she will going to take Medicine in college, reason? She didn't mention.
Yeah, I know they are just simple facts but hah! Someday, I will going to know every detail of her life.
"I told you, to talk to you," I simply answered.
I can't say because I like you. I know she will definitely get mad at me.
"And still, no progress? Hanggang kailan mo pag-aaralan?" she asked.
I stared at her for a couple of seconds. It seems like something is bothering her. Sa katunayan gamay ko na ang pagtatagalog. Ako yata si Nigel Streus. Sisiw lang sa akin ang lahat ng bagay. Pero dahil hindi pa ako handang umamin na gusto ko siya, hindi pa ako handang sabihin na hindi ko na kailangan ng tulong niya.
Baka kasi pagkatapos niyang malaman na kaya ko nang magsalita ay hindi na niya ako pansinin. Siyempre ayoko ng ganooNigel.
"Nigel hindi na ako rito mag-aaral sa susunod na taon."
"So?"
"Wala ka ng tutor."
I stared at her for a moment then back to what I am doing. There is really something that is bothering her. She's not someone who wears that kind of face. She is always cheerful and in high spirit.
"Then come to my house. You'll teach me there," I suggested.
"Nigel hindi naman puwede 'yun. I still have my work," she declined.
Hah! Ganun ba niya ako ka-ayaw turuan?
"Then work with me. I'll double your pay."
"Sounds tempting Nigel but I can't. I am pregnant."
I felt like I choke even though I am not drinking nor eating. She just drop a very unbelievable joke. I didn't know she's capable of doing that.
Lumingon ako sa kanya at nakahanda nang tumawa ngunit seryosong seryoso ang mukha niya. I can't identify whether she's really fooling around or she's serious. I was about to ask if she is really serious about it but she opened her mouth before I could.
"Charot! Hahahahahaha."
Kumunot ang noo ko sa sagot niya at sa malakas na pagtawa niya. As I thought she's lying. Hah! Hindi ko pa nga siya nililigawan ang magka-anak kaya magkatotoo? Siyempre hindi. I am going to be the father of her children. That is a promise!
"Naniwala ka ba sa acting ko?" tanong niya habang tinutusok tusok ng daliri niya ang pisngi ko.
"Your acting sucks. If you will going to be a lead star I won't waste my money buying a ticket for your movie."
Of course that's a lie. Baka nga ipasara ko pa ang buong movie theater ng isang buwan para lang panoorin siya sa big screen. And of course I will make sure that I would be the leading man.
"Pero seryoso Nigel. Hindi ka pa rin ba sanay magsalita ng Tagalog? Mag-aapat na buwan na. Tapos dalawang buwan na lang college na ako, ikaw grade 5 na."
"Maybe you're just not a good tutor."
"Parang 'yun nga ang kaso. Sige hanap ka na lang ng ibang magtuturo 'yung mas magaling sa akin," nagtatampong sabi niya at akmang tatayo na siya ngunit kaagad kong nahila ang kamay niya.
"I was just kidding," sagot ko na hindi tumitingin sa kanya.
I know that I am blushing right now. This is the first time that I get to hold her hands and damn! Hah! I don't know what to say.
"Nigel huwag na tayong maggaguhan. Naiintindihan mo ako kahit dirediretsong Tagalog ang salita ko kaya alam kong kaya mo nang magsalita," pagpupumilit niya ngunit nagtataka lang akong tumingin sa kanya.
"What are you talking about?" maang maangang tanong ko.
"Nigel, I'm dead serious here. Next year babalik na ako sa Pilipinas. Doon na ako magpapatuloy sa pag-aaral. Ayoko namang umalis dito na wala kang natutunan. It's depressing. Pakiramdam ko wala akong kuwentang magturo," mahabang pahayag niya habang nakatitig lang na nakangiti sa mga mata ko.
Her eyes are glistening yet it feels like she's holding back her tears. I stared at her eyes for a moment. Wala talaga siyang balak sabihin sa akin kung anuman ang bumabagabag sa isip niya.
"I already know how to speak Tagalog," wala sa sariling usal ko.
I was so enticed by her eyes and her smile. I can't really resist Mavy. I can't really resist the girl I like.
Mas lumawak ang mga ngiti niya. Hinawakan niya ang ulo ko saka ginulo ang buhok ko. "Good. I know you can do it," she praised me.
I shoved her hands and turned around hiding my red face. Argh! This is so not manly. Why do I always blush whenever the girl I like do or say something for me.
"Oh c'mon Nigel. Cute mo kaya kapag kinikilig," natatawang puna niya sa akin kaya mas lalo akong napasimangot.
Trip niya talaga akong pagtripan.
Naramdaman kong umupo siya sa tabi ko kaya bahagya akong napalingon sa kanya. I felt her arms hanged around my neck and fuck devils, my whole body stiffen. Argh!
"Bata ka pa Nigel. Hindi pa pagmamahal 'yang nararamdaman mo. I'm thankful kasi nagustuhan mo ako pero hindi tayo puwede Nigel," she muttered while looking somewhere.
What's with this sudden rejection speech?
I haven't even confess to her yet.
"Ever wonder why I'm always alone under that tree? It's because I do not have any friends. You know, social status. Kaya nga nagpapasalamat ako na may bubwit na sumulpot. Kasi simula noon nagkaroon ako ng bwibwisitin," dagdag pa niya.
Pinagmasdan ko lang siya habang nagsasalita. The smiles that were escaping from her lips are all genuine. She's really happy that I came. Well I guess, may pag-asa ako. Baka hindi ito rejection speech.
"Hindi naman sa assuming ako pero halatang crush mo ako," she laughed at her remark. "Pero gaya nga ng sabi ko, bata ka pa. You and I are a hundred miles apart."
"Who says that I have a crush on you?" I blurted out of the blue. I still don't want her to know. I still don't want to admit it.
"Then that's good. Walang pagseselosan ang boyfriend."
Her last remark made me stop. So she's telling the truth. She already got a man and that was her rejection speech. Wow! Hah!
Hah!
Hah!
Hah!
"Then congratulations Mavy."
•••••
"I agree with ate Mavy. Bata ka pa noon Doc Nigel."
"Bata? But she was still in my heart 'til I was in high school," I said and that made her look at me with disbelief.
Just like what I thought. Wala talagang maniniwala sa akin na si Mavy pa rin ang nasa puso ko hanggang sa mag-high school ako. Isama na rin ang college.
Wala talagang naniniwala na alam na ng bata ang salitang pagmamahal. Wala naman sa edad iyon sa pagkaka-alam ko. As long as you, yourself can feel it, it is love.
They keep on insisting the 'bata ka pa, hindi mo pa alam ang ibig sabihin ng pagmamahal'. Para saan pa pala ang age doesn't matter?
"You don't believe me?"
"Yes!" walang pagdadalawang-isip na sagot niya.
"I even defied my father's will just for her and studied here in the Philippines. Tapos sasabihin ni'yong hindi kapani-paniwala. Tsk tsk."
I am suppose to be an Architect and managing our company but all for love, I got the courage to defy my own father. Ganoon siguro ako katanga sa pag-ibig noon.
Oh scratch. Ganoon siguro ako kadesperado na magkaroon ng taong magmamahal sa akin.
Fine! Ako na ang kulang sa aruga.