Bria was born in July 2015 an underweight, wrinkly, pink baby with big curious eyes and a head full of brunette hair. The midwife placed her on my chest as she cried. She instantly stopped when we made skin to skin contact. "Welcome to the world " I whispered to her as I gently stroked her sticky hair as the chaos happened just a few inches away from me. The doctor cleaned and stitched up my tears. "What is her name?" A young nurse asked me as she watched us."Bria," I replied "Bria Micheal Ramirez." It fitted so well Michael after her father of course even though we will never see each other again I wanted to have a little piece of him with her in her name. Ramirez is my new name given by the witness protection program. I emailed Nate about her birthday and sent him a pic of her in her little crib next to me in the hospital. He wrote back congratulations. And we wished he was here to see her. He was her godfather after all. Even though it was never made official it was understood between us. I never messaged Nate about Michael, I couldn't regret still was strong in my heart and head. I shot him and fled. Nate had to stage my death using a corpse of the morgue who was the most similar to me in age and appearance. My car was then driven off a secluded road and hit a lamp post causing it to burst into flame. The corpse of the woman then burns until no recognition could be found. While I was safe in the witness protection that what Nate told me and I placed my trust in him. I did without question I had my baby to think about, to protect.
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We arrived in New Jersey at around six in the evening and immediately got into one of Micheal Mercedes Benns. Bria had fallen asleep on the plane ride but had gotten up as soon as we landed. she was still groggy from sleep so she pretty much clung unto me the whole while as we drove to Millburn to Micheal estate. I started to fidget in my seat disguising it as if I were rocking Bria. I watched outside the window and watched the scenery as we drove trying to keep my mind off of things. I wished I could open the door and dash out, even more, I wished that Micheal could just finish me instead of this long torturous ride but Bria was here and he wouldn't do anything in front of her. I saw how he looked at her when we were on the plane with awe. Like if she was this tiny angel I was cradling in my arms. He saw me give Bria her medication and he watched on with the same pained expression I normally have knowing that my child is unwell I could tell he already has fallen in love with her.
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It was easy to forget we were once married. It was easier to remember the hurt of that last night, the one where I stood with a gun in my hand aimed at Micheal. Sylvia had taken Bria as soon as he arrived at Micheal's estate, the one I called my home for two years. One year engaged and one year happily married.
I was the queen of this castle once now I am most likely a prisoner or maybe in this place I will lose my life. I stood in Michael's office. It looked the same, the same big mahogany table in the centre of the room with its black leather chair.
Michael had his back to me as I stared at him too afraid to move. He turned to face me, placing a gun I recognized on the table. The gun he gave me for protection when I was his doting wife, the one I betrayed him with."I should let you explain, yourself. Would you want that?" He asked"Ah, I " I stammered.``But what can you possibly say to save yourself, Valentina?" He continued.``Or should I say, Farrah Ramirez!" He shouted in the quiet room his voice echoed.
"What was I supposed to do?" "The police were going to arrest you! I shot you in your chest! What would have become of me if I stayed and you survived? I was pregnant and I had my baby to protect."
"Our baby!" He shouted once more "You took my child and change your fucking name and went on with your life fine and dandy. " He went on as he tried calming himself sliding his hand in his pocket. The thing he always did when he wanted to punch someone out or a wall."That wasn't it, you killed a man Michael. You killed Toby!" I yelled back as tears rolled down my face. Michael's eyes told me it was time to shut up. "He had a ninety-year-old grandmother who needed him." I continued
He sprung forward to where I was standing and grabbed me by my jaws.I flinch in pain as stood looking down at me through his long black eyelashes his eyes were furious and threatening swirling with the colour of his mood daring me to continue."I'm warning you, Valentina tread lightly." I started to whimper as he tightened his hands seeing that I was in genuine pain he loosened his grip on my jaw and I grabbed my chin instantly it throbbed so badly.
"I wanted to protect her from this life. From the constant need for protection. From everything that was here. I wanted a new life." I continued
"Oh, you wanted Bria to live in a one-bedroom room apartment? Going to public school with a mother who was a cashier in a grocery barely making ends meet each month?" He asked in a mocking tone."No!"
My legs were feeling so fucking weak. I wanted to just lay on the floor. I'm so tired it was even hard to breathe. Michael had that effect when he was angry with you. He takes the whole room and sucks it out of air."I just wanted to protect her," I repeated again
"You took everything from me when you decided that I wasn't good enough to be a father." His voice hitched and he breathed in and out trying to control his emotions, and that's when I saw what he was trying to conceal behind his angry eyes.