Thomas left Sophie to go through Jerimiah's things alone but told her to come get him if she needed anything.
Sophie found a basket and a burlap sack and started putting items into them. In Jeremiah's chest she found two very nice trousers and shirts. She didn't know what she should do with them but she figured she would figure it out eventually. So put them inside the sack keeping them folded nicely. But not before smelling them first. What did he smell like? She tried to determine as she sniffed. It was a nice musty smell. It has a little hay or stray scent to it too. Like he spent time outside. She decided she liked it. She thought about what she said to Thomas, that she thought Jeremiah might be watching. She hoped he was and she handled everything with the most respect and care that she could. She found a more worn out set of trousers and work shirt. These must have been his work clothing. She folded them and put them in the sack as well.
On his desk she found a few books. One that had his own drawings in them. There was a map of shipping routes from the Americas to England. It also appeared he was mapping out the surrounding area as well. He had very small handwriting. She studied closely. Just seeing it made her feel closer to him. He drew the river, the farms surrounding the town, there was a section marked 'Indian territory, proceed with caution.' He drew several small triangles to indicate a mountainous area. She found that particular notebook to be very helpful so she placed it in the basket where she could find it easily.
A breeze blew through the cottage and she thought she picked up on a whiff of the scent that was on his shirt. She smiled thinking it could be him standing nearby.
"I'm sorry I never met you," she whispered into the nothingness. A breeze again came through the room picking up a stack of letters and blowing them around the room.
She gathered them quickly. They were from his mother and father. She thought she would read those later to see if she could gain more of an understanding of who he was. What really interested her was the small charcoal drawn portrait that was with the letters. It was of a family. A mother, father and two adult children, both male. On the back it had the names. Sterling, Dorothy, Timothy and Thomas.
She looked at the portrait even closer identifying Thomas on the far right. He was wearing a nice suite, his hand tucked into the pocket of it. He looked very stately. He looked exactly like the man in her dream. She nearly dropped the photo.
"You were extremely handsome," she said, again into nothingness. She was a little out of breath from the shock. The wind didn't blow that time, she didn't smell him, but she felt a warmth on her right side. It would be so easy to pass it off as nothing or as her crazy imagination but she chose to believe that it was him, sitting beside her. She smiled.
"It's weird, I never met you, but I miss you." She felt the warmth grow beside her. "Will you help me?" she asked in a weak voice. "I'm pretty lost here without you. Will you help me find my way?"
The thought that was placed in her mind was a voice she had never heard before. It was more of a tenor voice than Thomas's and he said, 'of course I will darlin, you will not be alone here.'
The thought immediately proceeding that was, wow Soph you are truly losing your mind. That was of course her own cynicism taking over and she let it go. Even if she was losing her mind and making up this imaginary companion, it would probably only help her survive. So, she vowed she would let the ghost of Jeremiah, or her inner nut job, whichever one it was, comfort her right now.
She took a small break to go back to the governor's house. She was lucky enough to avoid running into Frida while she dashed to her room. She retrieved her hair brush, mirror and her black dress. It was the same dress she wore after daddy died.
When she returned she went through some more items sorting and stacking them. He really didn't own a lot. Before she knew it, it was dark out. She found a candle and lit it for some light. She shivered in the cold. She went over to the fireplace and tried to figure out how to light a fire. She had never lit one before, even though she had one in her personal quarters. The maid always did it.
"I am completely and utterly helpless," she said out loud. She felt the warmth return. This time she felt it on her left. "How do I start a fire?" she asked her ghost.
The same tenor voice she heard earlier entered her mind. 'Get Tom,'
"Tom?" she said out loud. "Oh, Thomas. Are you sure, I think he is getting sick of me already.
The same thought again entered her mind, 'get Tom,'
"Fine," she said grabbing the candle as she walked to the door, "But if he is mad I'm blaming it on you."
She thought she felt a chuckle in her mind. She wondered if she really was ready to be insane or not because this was escalating quickly.
She knocked lightly on Thomas' door. He opened it quickly.
"I had a feeling it was you," he said in his deep voice.
"I am so embarrassed to say this, but I don't know how to start a fire,"
He grabbed a torch off the wall.
"Lead the way," he said with no more questions.
Thomas, or Tom as her ghost liked to call him, showed her how to use the flint to start the fire and how to stack the wood to create the most heat.
"In the winter it will get really cold so you will want to take those embers that are burning below here," he motioned. "And you can put them in this," he showed her the metal pan that she recognized from home. The maid would put them at the foot of her bed to help her stay warm. He demonstrated how to fish the embers out and put them in the pan. "This way you don't freeze at night. Tonight it won't be cold though so you should be fine."
"Thank you, I really appreciate it."
"Not a problem," he said as he stood up. She walked him to the door and leaned on the frame. "Anything else I can help you with?" he asked.
She was hungry, she didn't know how to cook so she hadn't eaten since the celebration but she didn't think she could handle anymore humiliation. She would figure that out later.
"No, that should do it. I think I will go to sleep and finish the rest in the morning."
"Okay," he said. He hesitated a moment like he wanted to say more but changed his mind. Across the street the tavern door opened and Lenard and some other men burst through it singing, yelling and tripping over each other.
"Are they, are they drunk?" she asked.
"Yeah," he smiled. "They are drunk."
"Wow," she marveled at them. "I've actually never seen a drunk man before."
"Welcome to the new world Sophie." He tipped his hat at her and walked back to this shop. She smiled as she watched him walk away and she kept a weather eye on the men across the street. She bolted the door behind her.
Sophie sat by the fire a few minutes stocking it and feeding it. It wouldn't be cold tonight but she despised the dark. She liked to have a nice fire just for the added light. She got it really rolling before she decided to retire.
She pulled her dress off and laid it gently over his chest. She rolled her stockings down and did the same. She followed suit with her corset and skirts. She was very aware of the fact that she was in a man's home only in her shift. If Jeremiah hadn't died, this would be their wedding night. Another wave of sadness hit her. She would like to have a wedding night. She was always so nervous about it, but now that it had been taken from her, she felt incredibly sad.
She pulled the covers back and crawled between the sheets. The bed smelled like man. It smelled like Jeremiah. It couldn't be anyone else's scent. She expected the sheets to be cold but they weren't. They felt warm like someone had just been laying in them. She nestled deep into the blankets.
"I wish you were here," she whispered into the darkness.
The warmth returned once again. Encircling about her just as if someone had wrapped their arms around her. She closed her eyes and sunk into a peaceful slumber.