Entering the huge front doors of Leo's mansion, I watched Ruth's eyes go wide as she took in the ostentatious place that Leo called his home, a three storey house sprawling across few acres of land that was fit to accomodate no less than 150 people comfortably.
And it was indeed rumoured that the house had once sheltered people upto its capacity sometime in the past.
It was a running joke in the family that every Cross that was ever born has lived or will live here at some point in their lives.
Except me, ofcourse. Even with Leo's distinctively vivid - not to mention, highly exaggerated - versions of my prolonged stay here, I personally had no memory of ever spending any substantial time in this house that qualified as living here.
"Would you like a tour?" I asked Ruth when I caught her eying the grand staircase that dominated the northern part of living room.
"Um, won't Leo mind if we explore his house without his permission?"
"What Leo doesn't know," I winked at her before beckoning her to follow me. Ruth walked a step behind mine as I walked across the ground floor, pointing at various areas and rooms as I went.
I watched her eyes taking in curiously everything I pointed and it occured to me of how larger than life it must've looked to her.
I could relate, ofcourse. I had felt the same way when I had first seen the mansion. It truly looked nothing less than a castle coming to life, right out of a fairytale book.
"And upstairs are mostly bedrooms, offices, the library, and—"
"The library?" Ruth interrupted as we climbed the steps to the next floor. I paused and glanced up at her at the same time she looked up at me, standing a step below mine, looking like an adorable little girl on her first trip to Disney land.
Our gazes locked and for some weird reason I felt her look pierce me right through the chest. For a moment I froze, until she called my name.
"Caleb?" Ruth called, snapping me out of my daze. She raised a brow in question and I mentally slapped myself before clearing my throat.
"Uh, library. Yeah, there's one on the first floor. Whole East wing of that floor, actually."
Her eyes lit up hearing that and she glanced behind her, at the double doors leading out to the backyard and then back at me expectantly, and I felt myself melt.
Not literally, ofcourse. But it sure felt that way. Like all of my reservations, and caution, my resolve to keep things as distant and light - if possible, even professional - between us just physically drained out of my body.
And oddly, it felt liberating. Like, a weight was lifted off my shoulders. Smiling broadly, I turned and led the way to the East side of the floor, basking in the excitement that radiated off her.
I paused at an inconspicuous looking single door and turned my grin to her.
"Ready?"
At her nod, I opened the door and stepped aside as she entered the room, and watched her jaw drop. I kept my gaze on her, as she walked deeper inside and then did a slow circle where she stood, gazing around her in wonder.
"Unbelievable," she whispered in awe and I smiled broader.
Her reaction reminded me of the first time I had entered this room. I gave a sweeping glance around, noting that everything was still exactly how I remembered it.
Similar to all the other floors, the East wing originally had 5 to 6 rooms, but the walls separating them were knocked down to clear one huge space.
The back walls were completely replaced with transparent glasses, separated by pillars, that overlooked the backyard where Leo's bonfire was currently in progress. The glow from the blazing fire below, mingled with the darkening sky outside illuminated the room in its warm glow and dancing shadows.
The walls adjoining the door were panneled in cherry red wood, same as the floors and the rest of the furniture. Right next to the window was an ancient looking fireplace that no one used anymore with a small table and two straight-backed arm chairs. An oval table sat squarely in front of the glass windows, surrounded by plush chairs that looked like it could accomodate more than one person at a time.
But as inviting as the view was though, it still wasn't the main attraction of the room.
It was the floor to ceiling cherry red bookshelves that lines every wall around the wing, that held the attention of about everyone who first entered here. It was sectionally distributed, having books on just about every subject a person could think of, with a low shelved corner stocked exclusively with children's books.
"It feels like I have stepped into a fairytale," Ruth whispered and I chuckled.
"I know what you mean. I felt the same way when uncle Martin - Leo's dad, that is - had brought me here when I was 10. I think he had hoped that this would give me some motivation to prolong my visits."
"So you've lived here?"
"In Boston, yes. In the mansion, not really. But I've visited here often until I went to highschool."
"So you and Leo grew up together."
"Kind of. Uncle Martin was like an ultimate family guy. He loved having his family around him, living under the same roof, baking cookies and all that shit. Leo takes up a lot after him."
I finished with a smile, suddenly missing the old man's presence around.
Ruth looked at me with soft eye.
"You really love him, don't you?"
"Its hard not to love a man like him, isn't it? Much like Leo, actually. So kind and gentle. Almost, motherly. Always a smile on his face. He was the self-proclaimed patriarch of Cross family, being the eldest among all his cousins. And he took that role very seriously."
"He sounds wonderful. Would I get to meet him today?"
I felt the warmth leave me as I said, "he died in a car crash few years ago."
"I'm sorry to hear that," she murmured, and I nodded in response before deciding to look for the light switch. It used to be right next to the door. But a few things have obviously been changed here.
"Why did you stop visiting?"
At my questioning look, she clarified, "You said you visited until you went to highschool. I mean if I had access to a place like this, I'd probably never leave," Ruth sighed in contentment, stroking the spines some astrophysics books and watching that immediately sent my mind into the gutter.
What was it about this girl that frequently did this to me?
Too distracted by her fingers that were currently tracing - no, caressing - the spines of aeronautics encyclopaedias, I replied her without thinking.
"My mother and I moved to Seattle when I was 15," I murmured.
"And your dad?"
She looked over her shoulder towards me, her hands still on the books and I swallowed hard. Every coherent thought left my mind as her position right now flashed into my mind in an altogether different circumstance.
Without realising what I was doing, I walked up to her, watching her eyes go wide, and her lips part. I can only imagine what look I had on my face as I stopped right behind her close enough to feel her warmth.
She stood frozen, gazing at me as she waited to see what I'd do next. Placing my hands over hers on the bookshelf, I entwined our fingers and boxing her simultaneously. Her breathe hitched and even though her back was to me, I felt her body go soft and willing, instinctively moving closer to me.
I paused within an inch of her lips, letting her scent wash over me. Like, warm cider and raindrops.
"Tell me to stop, Ruth," I whispered, feeling her fingers close around mine on the bookshelf. Her throat worked as she eyed my lips for a moment before slowly turning around to face me without breaking our interlinked fingers.
She exhaled harshly as her back pressed to the books behind her, and for a moment, she looked unsteady.
I pressed closer to her, pressing myself to her as much as I can. I was drawn to her warmth. Somehow, she seemed to be the only thing that was capable of melting the ice that has surrounded my heart for years.
And in all honesty, I was getting tired of fighting with myself. She promised relief. Peace. And I was too selfish to not take it, no matter how much I wanted to protect her from myself.
But even in my greed, there was no way I would seduce her into something she did not want. I cupped her, tilting her face up to me until her eyes met mine.
"Ruth, tell me to stop," I pleaded, for what I wasn't sure I understood. But she did. Covering my hand with hers that was over her cheek, she met my eyes with a surprisingly steady gaze.
"Not today," she finally whispered back before leaning up and pressing her soft lips to mine.