The sun shone its rays over the orange horizon, as it peaked above the clouds as soft, metallic cotton. The voice of the azaan reached her ears, as she was packing her bags. Her flight was due tomorrow, but she couldn't keep up with the packing, and everything that happened last night.
Frazzled to the core, she picked up the lip gloss, and tossed it in the cosmetics bag, earning a glare from her roomate, who was sitting and chewing on bubble gum.
It was her fourth bubble gum, which she was munching quite sporadically.
"What?" Naz exclaimed, looking at her friend who was sitting idle.
"Just lookin'."
Anna shrugged her shoulders in an off-hand way, munching away at the gum.
"Can you stop that?!"
Nazpari asked, exasperation evident from her voice. She dropped herself on the bed, next to her suitcase which had things spilling out of it.
"No I can't."
Anna replied, putting another wad of gum in her mouth. She proceeded to chew to quite surreptitiously after.
Naz huffed looking at her friend, who was irritating her terribly. She stood up, off the bed and walked towards her closet to gather some of her casual clothes.
Picking them she put them in the bag, closing the zip with a ziiipp!
Naz lookef up at Anna, nervously. She was about to do something, that she should regret, but she couldn't as yet.
"Anna, can you go get some takeout? I don't want to make dinner tonight."
She said, pretending to rummage through her handbag.
"Oh! But you are a protestant against takeout. What made you change your mind, huh?"
Anna said, her eyebrows skyrocketing.
"Well, you will understand this once you pack two suitcases. I am bone crushingly tired!"
Naz said, biting her lip. She knew really well that it was a lie. She needed Anna out of the house, so that she could take it out.
A lie said to protect.
But a lie is a lie.
She shrugged her thoughts away, as Anna started getting up from her bed. She nodded, and asked,
"What will you have then?"
"Anything you like."
She replied, not even looking at her friend the straight way.
"Hmm. Okay! I'll be back soon then!"
With that Anna swirled out of her room, taking all the swag with herself, and banging the door to a close.
Naz looked at the door for a few seconds, straining her ears to hear the bang of the front door of the dormitory.
In a daze, she stood up and with quick steps walked towards her porcelain flower vase. She carefully picked it up, and with a slip of her fingers brought out a key, no bigger than her little finger.
Putting it back on its place, she snatched the key of the top of the table, and walked to towards her cupboard.
Bending down she pulled away all her clothes, revealing a tiny drawer inside.
Maneuvering the key inside the keyhole, she turned it and with a faint click, the drawer opened.
A blade tied with a pink ribbon sat inside.
Picking it with shaky fingers, she admired its metallic beauty.
Maybe normal people wouldn't see the beauty radiating off of it, but she could.
She wasn't normal, quite the opposite apparently.
She closed the drawer with a snap, and stood straight walking towards her bed. In a frenzy she plopped down next to her suitcase and kept on staring at the Angelic thing in her hand.
She brought it close to her eyes, reading the initials on it.
ZM
ZM
Some sort of wistfulness trickled inside her, as her big eyes filled with tears.
The tears, the scars, the enigma.
Everything so vivid. So ghastly, so petrifying.
She lightly touched the sharp end of the blade, and then pressed the soft pad of her index finger to the point that all her senses screamed pain.
But she didn't stopped, as blood trickled down the soft pad of the index finger and onto her palm.
Fascinated with the swirling beauty, she looked on not remembering where she was.
Is waqt tho yun lagta hai ab kuch bi nahi hai,
Mehtab na suraj, na andhera na sawera.
(This time I feel there is nothing now,
No moon, no sun, no dawn, no dusk).
Faiz Ahmed Faiz
"I am baack. Naz where--"
Anna stopped short, when she saw the dreaded thing in her friend's hand, which she desperately tried to conceal within the clothes that were spread around her.
"What the actual fuck?!"
Anna said, dropping the food on the counter of the kitchen and walking towards Naz, who had her head hung low.
Anna came to her and sat beside her, taking the blade away from her wounded and bloodied fingers. She placed it on the side table, turning her attention back to Nazpari.
"Nazpari, you fucking promised."
Anna's tone was silent. She never called Nazpari by her whole name, because she knew how much her friend disliked her name.
She only called Nazpari by her full name when she was very pissed off.
"Ann, I--"
She started but something stuck in her throat. She ended up just shaking her head meekly at her friend.
"You lied."
Anna said, all the visual appearance of being a bossy and a hype girl gone. In its place a sad girl sat, who was disappointed in her friend.
"Ann, please. I--I was just looking--"
A tear squeezed out of her eye as it slid down her cheek.
"Looking? You were freaking looking? Naz look at your fingers!"
Anna said, holding her best friends hand which had splotches of blood over the fingers area.
"I didn't noticed."
Naz said, now horror marking her expressions.
"Yes. Just say that. All this wrong thinking and useless hurting is making you act wrong for yourself!"
Anna said, shoting up from the bed and standing beside her head.
"Ann, you know I am coping. I-I just a little more time. I promise--"
"You promised. You promised you have thrown this away! You promised that you were taking your meds regularly. You lied, Naz! You lied!"
Anna exclaimed, furious with what she had caught Naz doing.
Anna opened her hair tie, and paced about inside the room, trying to gather her thoughts.
"Anna, I am sorry."
Naz said, standing up and taking small steps towards her friend, who was pacing around.
"Naz you can't do this anymore. I am going to talk to aunty Aarfa about this."
Anna said, determination shining in her eyes.
Naz felt light headed, as she looked at Anna. All her breathe being snatched away in one terrible stroke.
"No! Anna, no please! I beg you!"
Naz pleaded, her face crumpling up. She took her friend's arm, trying to coax her to do otherwise.
"Have you left me with any other option, Naz?"
Anna questioned her freeing her arm from Nazpari's grip and looking dejectedly at her.
"No. Anna, I have not! But please believe me! I am trying my best to forget but it--"
"Naz, please sit and gather your thoughts."
Anna said, gesturing Naz to sit down.
"Anna, promise me. Promise me you won't tell ammi jaan a thing!"
Naz blabbered, not quite in focus on anything.
"Naz, this is hurting you. You need something to heal it. A psychiatrist."
Anna put it all put in the open for Naz to see her thoughts on the matter.
"But I don't need one."
Naz whispered, shaking her head at her friend.
"Don't you see how it's messing with your head?"
Anna again tried, but it seemed that it was a losing battle for her.
"Anna please. I will try. If you don't believe me, then take the blade with you. I won't even touch it again, but please don't tell anyone. Okay?"
Naz pleaded.
Anna looked at her face. A face so beautiful, but internally marred with a past as cruel as destiny itself.
She felt herself being persuaded by Nazpari.
"Okay, but this is the last chance. After it, I will have a long chat with your mum over a cup of coffee."
Anna said, nodding her head in affirmation. She smiled slowly at Nazpari, who did the same.
Only Naz's smile didn't quite reach her eyes at all.
Naz stood up, and went to wash her hands of the blood. In the washroom, she looked at herself in the mirror, praying that Anna doesn't finds a twin pocket blade in her suitcase's net zipper.
She washed her face and hands, and walked out of the washroom.
Everything turned to normalcy, or a degree of normality which only they had.
Anna's mood was light now, but the vestiges of what she had seen Naz doing hadn't vanished yet.
Time and time again as they ate dinner, Naz several times caught Anna glancing at her.
Glances that were full of sympathy.
Muhabbat kerne walon ki tijarat bhi anokhi hai,
Muna'afe chorr dete hain, khasaray ba'ant lete hain.
(The trade of people who love is different,
Leaving the profit aside, they share the loss).
Picking up the phone she looked at the Caller I.D which was of Warda's.
A smile spread on her lips, as she picked up the call of her most favourite cousin.
"Hello?"
Naz asked, as their was a squeal from the other end. She pulled the phone from her ear, and flinched by the intensity of the squeal.
After a few moments, when the squealing came to an end, she said,
"Warda?"
"The one and only! Warda Sultan aka Words!"
Wards squealed on the other end, yet again.
This girl wants to deafen me!
Naz thought, but she heard Warda say,
"Phupho told me that you are coming!"
Warda said, happiness dripping from her words.
"Apparently, yes."
Naz said, nodding her head in affirmation.
"Yaar! I am soo excited!"
Warda squealed again. Naz could visualise her jumping up and down, head over heels in utter excitement.
Naz felt herself grinning too by Warda's contagiousness.
"You are contagious, you know. I am excited to be there too!"
Naz said, moving the cell phone from her right ear to the left.
"Yup, I know that already!"
Warda exclaimed through the phone.
"So, what now? Have you reached the Villa?"
Naz asked, garnishing the pasta she was making.
"Yess, we just reached today- me and mom. The family was esctatic to see us. Everyone seemed so change now."
Her cousin on the other end of the communication line said, sounding quite happy to meet her extended family.
"Of course, they must be changed now. You have seen you after a very long time. Almost five years!"
Naz agreed.
"And then mom cried. It was so awkward for me. I have never wanted Harry's invisibility cloak as much as I wanted it at that time!"
Warda ranted, telling Nazpari about her experience with the family.
"Wish that I saw you at that time."
Naz said, chuckling and visualising Warda's cringiness.
"Naz! Right now mum is calling me, but as soon as I get my hands on you, I swear you will regret making fun of Warda the Great!"
Naz chuckled again and heard Warda's voice with some shuffling in the background. Almost on cue the line went silent.
She dropped the phone on the bed and flopped down beside it. Anna was gone to God knows where and she was getting seriously bored out of her mind.
Getting up, she thought of doing something recreational other then wasting her time dwelling on her thoughts, which become toxic and make breathing, hard for her.
That's when her phone vibrated with an incoming call.
She held the phone in her hands, not remembering the phone number that was incoming.
It was a call coming from a number she never talked to.
Being the smart girl she was, she ignored the call. Three more times her phone rang with the same incoming number, but she paid no heed.
Finally when the ringing stopped, she felt a beep from a text.
She opened the messages app, and much to her amazement a text had come from the same number, which just moments before was calling her.
She clicked at the text, which read:
NS binte ZM
Her initials with ZM's.
The phone slipped from her fingers, as her body turned still. A cold shiver ran down her spine.
A bad shiver.
That chilled her to the very bones.
She didn't know for how much minutes, she sat there staring into nothingness.
Maybe it was moments, or maybe hours.
Or maybe eternity.
The only fact that was visible on the line of her fate were the leeching memories and the shattered wishes, buried deep within.
_________________________________________
One thing should be made clear and that is
Annabelle is Anna or Ann. All three names belong to the same person.
Nazpari's friend.
Urdu dictionary:
Ammi jaan- mother or mom.
Phupho- aunt (Father's sister).
Please share your opinion with me.
Also, who do you think is ZM?
AND
what's the relation between him and our female lead?
If you liked, please don't forget to
VOTE,
COMMENT,
and SHARE.
Share your thoughts,
-Rozà.☆