Ned the necromancer smiled as he put down the phone, he can finally find out from Azeroth how many undead he can summon. And he can finally summon some handsome Male undead to have sex with.
"Oh ! Mighty Azeroth system, how many undead can I summon ? I can summon undead now right ?", Ned the necromancer asked respectfully.
"Of course, would I lie to you, but I have to announce your reward first.", the Azeroth system aka Joshua Parker said in a childish voice. What Ned the necromancer did not know was the Ancient god Miriam of the madness was whispering into Joshua Parker's ears, giving him suggestions that would make Ned Earp's life miserable.
"... you have to give him a tinge of hope before you crush it...", Miriam of madness whispered in Joshua Parker's ear as Joshua played with his Lego figurines.
"Congratulations ! You now have the summoning of the undead king ! You can finally summon a city of undead to assist you in your endeavour to conquer the world !", the Azeroth system shouted out in a childish voice in Ned Earp's head.
"Yes ! Yes ! Finally ! Thank you Azeroth system ! You are the best !", Ned the necromancer shouted out in happiness.
"Does our shameless master do this every time...", Kara the undead knight said in a sad tone as he looked on at Ned the necromancer in his red underwear.
"No. He only does that when he gets a new power.", Samantha the undead fire demon said nonchalantly.
Ned the necromancer's eye brows furrowed together as he concentrated. Ned shouted out, "Come forth five Male undead for your master !".
A light flashed as five Male undead appeared but they look like badly eaten zombies showing bones and skeletons across their smelly bodies. Their skin has long rotted away and their teeth has long fallen off. Some of them only has a single eye ball. These five Male undead were disgustingly ugly and extremely frightening.
"Shit ! I have been conned ! Azeroth system ! I thought you said I can summon undead now ! Why do they look like that ?!", Ned the necromancer shouted out in an exasperated tone.
"Oh ! Didn't you know, general undead summoned tend to look like that. Samantha and Kara are two special undead summon.", the Azeroth system said in a childish voice in a happy tone.
"You... you... played me.", Ned the necromancer said in an exasperated tone.
"What did you say ?", the Azeroth system asked sinisterly.
"Uh ! Oh ! Mighty Azeroth system, your wisdom knows no bounds. This foolish one apologies for his stupid remarks.", Ned the necromancer said respectfully.
"That's better. You still have one special undead you can summon for completing this mission. And congratulations, you are now a level 7 necromancer.", the Azeroth system said in a childish voice.
"Really...! Thank you Azeroth system.", Ned the necromancer said in a happy tone.
"So what do you want to summon this time, a Male undead like the last two times.", the Azeroth system said in a funny tone. In fact Joshua Parker was trying to stifle his laughter when he said that. The last two times Joshua gave a reward of special summons for completing the mission, Ned the necromancer specifically asked for a handsome Male undead demon and an undead knight. And both times, Joshua Parker gave Ned the necromancer a beautiful undead female demon and a knight.
After being played twice by the Azeroth system, Ned the necromancer has become smarter. The last two times when Ned Earp requested to summon a handsome Male undead, instead a beautiful female undead turned up, the Azeroth system would say oh sadly a mistake happened, better luck next time.
"I want a beautiful female undead mage, please summon her for me.", Ned the necromancer said with a smirk. This time Ned was going to request for a female and if the Azeroth system is like the previous times, a handsome undead Male mage should appear in front of him.
"Are you sure ? Don't you want a handsome undead Male mage ?", the Azeroth system asked in a childish voice.
"No. No. I definitely want an beautiful female undead mage.", Ned the necromancer said in a happy tone.
"Are you sure ?", the Azeroth system asked again.
"Yes. Yes. I want a beautiful female undead mage to be summoned to be my slave.", Ned the necromancer said happily.
"Okay.", the Azeroth system said with a funny tone.
A magic circle with unknown inscription soon appeared in front of Ned the necromancer. Soon a figure started to appear in front of Ned the necromancer. A flash of light appeared and soon a figure of a beautiful brown haired female undead mage appeared.
"My name is Marge, the undead mage master. I shall serve you forever as your slave.", Marge the undead mage knelt on the floor in front of Ned the necromancer.
"Fuck !", Ned the necromancer said unhappily.
Somewhere in the Hamptons, New York, Joshua Parker and Miriam his maid was rolling on the floor laughing at the misfortune of Ned the necromancer.
A few days later in the office of Nick Fury, Nick Fury was looking at the two reports submitted by Phil Coulson on the two prospects for the Avengers initiative.
The first file was on the beautiful red headed female named Samantha that could control flames. Name is Samantha, last name unknown. History unknown. Showed up two years ago in New York working for Ned Earp. Powers, control of fire. Other powers unknown. Family unknown. Relationship status unknown.
Next to Samantha's file was a file on Ned Earp which was slightly better. Ned Earp, history was that of a shameless man. Every year, Ned Earp would do something so shameful he would appear in the news for a short period of time before fading from the public eye. His other nickname to the news outlets is the reporters dream. Status, orphan, mother died. Father unknown. Powers mind control. Other powers unknown.
Nick Fury's single eye was twitching from reading this two reports. Nick Fury felt that he was not running a super secret spy agency but a kindergarten for mentally retarded children.
"Get me the mother fucking Phil Coulson ! Now !", Nick Fury shouted out to the intercom after reading these two reports.
"Yes sir.", the voice on the intercom replied back.