"Who are all the people on the pictures Ms. Brenda? Are any your children?"
"Naw Honey, The Lord didn't see fit for me to have none, I guess he put me here to take care of other folks and maybe I couldna done it if I had my own. After so long Bertrand didn't talk about it no more."
"Oh, Im sorry...
"Girl don't be sorry about Gods will. What about u Honey? Where yo babies, u wanna go get them?"
"No, no! Well, have two I mean. I miss them so much Ms. Brenda, they are with their fraternal grandmother. It is so hard for me to accept being away from them, my daughter had just turned 3 and she wasn't use to being around other people, our separation devastated her."
"I know u will tell me what got u into this mess whenever u ready, but remember always Honey, u can't cherish the good if u don't experience the bad...no I don't have none of my own, but God sent one right to my front door. I raised him and he work over there at the oil field. Turned out pretty good, I don't care for his ole wife but I did alright! (Laughter)
Lord, these feet...I worked 16 hours and I feel every bit of it. Chile when I was yo age I had TWO JOBS!"
"Wow, u worked alot! Im only 27 and one job gave me the blues."
"It ain't always been easy for women to get no work, especially colored ones. I seen my Mama work for Miss Anne nem twice a week her whole life. What u know bout walking to school 3 miles everday Chile? Dogs following behind ya, licking the bacon grease off ya legs...lotion? Tuh, Honey I didn't hear bout that til the 80's...(Laughter)
U know, we growed up poor, but we knew the value of family. Technology done changed so much... we all had jobs when I growed up. Our jobs were right at home. When I started working I realized what had happened! Wasn't no mo unity! See, it took all of us to run a household, Mama did the cooking and cleaning, me and my sister Wilma helped. My brother's Kenneth and Zachary, they helped in the field. Spring time came, everybody would go out and help plant the harvest, that was togetherness, we all needed each other and wasn't bitter about it! My Daddy would slaughter them hogs and we ate, I can't even remember a time when we didn't have no food! It's hard to find real families these days, don't nobody know they roles! Ironing, washing...people get a little money and forget their roles! (Laughter)
I got them two jobs and worked both of em eleven years. My mama passed, then my daddy. He use to always say The Bible said leave something for your children, and your children's children...and he did! He was a hard working man. I can see him now, comin 'cross that field with that old pitch fork upside down, he walked with a limp, ole horse got mad at him one evening, but he would come in the house and could be proud of what he worked for, and appreciated each one of us, we had been taught...and the woman he had married had done it! Mama was 16 years younger than he was, but he stayed around til she went on to Glory..."
"Aw Ms. Brenda! U are giving me so much right now! I am really glad I came to that shelter. U just dont know...I miss my cousin so much! If she was here I could just whip her! She...Oh, I loved her so much. She succumbed to Breast Cancer in April, so unexpectedly...and she knew she was sick, just hadn't told me. When she did, she said 'Ill see MuhDear real soon, its stage 4, then she showed them to me and said the cancer had spread to her liver and lungs. How could I have been so overwhelmed with school and work to not know she was very sick. She would tell me she was sick but nothing major and keep me from coming over but HOW COULD I NOT HAVE KNOWN! (Sad) She had stopped paying for insurance to help me with school and daycare. I, Oh My God...she stopped going to the hospital when they told her! (Wipes tears) She always said there was a mission for me to complete here but I had to drop out so...I lost everything! My car, my storage! All my babies pictures, my grandmother's sentimental keepsakes! Just just everything Ms. Brenda! Maybe that's why I can't leave! (Crying)"
(Grabs her hand) Sssshhhh...u never know what God has in store, u think I made it this far and ain't had to climb no hills! I seen my own husband Bertrand get in a car and drive off with that floozie and didn't come back! When he did she had killed him and he come back in a paper sack! So I know what grief and despair is, and I ain't been alone a day since he walked out and got in that Oldsmobile! I could lay in the bed and talk to Jesus, have dinner with him...we could go places, he didn't care if I ain't have no chilren! And just like them Chilren of Israel I walked in the wilderness and my shoes did not tear up! When I was hungry heaven opened up and gave me manna and water...there are people already in place to help u in this barren land Honey, I lived in that same shelter. Started cooking and worked my way up! We have to use what He give us by any means Chile, if we don't he will take it, and he gave US ALL something. Now u find out what u gotta do to get back down there in that college..."
"OH NO MS. BRENDA! I CAN'T LET U HEL..."
"Hush Chile, there go Whoopie...look at her glowin, that heffa aging backwards."