"Ah.." I sighed as I looked at all the inscriptions, calculations on the ground and walls, lowered my arm and the slate pencil, reminisced how it all had come to this..then closed my eyes.
Theories..possibilities..after all I've lived through, it all has come down to this. Can I really leave behind the few possibilities I have left? The chance to have an offspring..or the chance to find happiness, which should be something important in life..
I opened my eyes and let go of the slate pencil, walked out of the room and went outside to a first floor balcony. As the sun rays covered half of my body I covered my face with the shadow of my arm and looked slightly up.
"Aigh.." I sighed and squinted my eyes, then lowered my arm. "How many years does this planet have left? 40? At most 50.." my legs stepped backward and the sun rays faded from my body, then I returned to the room, turning myself back to the inscriptions on the walls and looked with a solemn face.
"Fu*k this, I know I have no other choice, I'm prepared to abandoned this meaningless "humanity" of mine and move on. It's too late for a good life here.." so what if I have to leave everything behind? What if I don't know where I'm going? I have no happiness here, only distractions. All the great possibilities have dwindled.
I've researched for many years. What our knowledge is limited to is just our depiction of reality. Shatter that reality and and there will be more to everything..but this state and meager accomplishments is the most I can make with my human capabilities. I want to continue. I want to grab all those unlimited posibilites with my own grasp and I still can as long as my will lives on!
I won't pretend I can be happy in this life! I won't live in ignorance, I need to reach greater heights! All I need is a life with the greatest potential!
The rooms temperature started to change frantically from colder to warmer, my arms moved closer to my chest, my fingers clenching halfway and my eyes wide open, peering beyond what I wouldn't normally be able to see. As space started to fluctuate and I reached out to increase the intensity of the fluctuations, the wind pushed around the leftover pencils and papers on the floor.
"Morum ** akdoma sa**dir!" Chants reverberated throughout the room, the density around the space in front of me increased, the fluctuations were now more visible. I retracted my arms back to me and the moving space got closer and closer. I slip my hand in one of my pockets to retrieve the stake I had prepared, then pointed the tip towards my chest.
"Hehe..I don't know what's waiting for me, but I'm starting to get thrilled..don't disappoint me, next life." I put my left arm on top of my right which had the stake and slammed it to into my heart, ending my life in this vessel o had been born with to stake everything on this new life.
💎• • •
Slightly plumy thighs, rather skinny feet, furry body..sharp claws..
Trying to keep my composure, I placed my hands on my face, touched a big animal nose, rather big eyes, pointy ears with less fur..
What..WHAT THE "SQUE*K"