Ryan's PoV:
Lex took me back to his place and gave me street clothes that consisted of a silk blue spaghetti strap flowy pajama shirt and matching blue shorts with black lace making up the hem. I sat on the couch trying to order a plane ticket.
"What're you doing?"
"God you've gotta stop doing that!"I nearly had a heart attack.
"What are you doing?" He ignored my statement.
"I'm trying to order a plane ticket."I glared.
"No need."He walked to the fridge.
"What do you mean? How else am I supposed to get there?"
"I'll pay for everything."
"Wait what?"
"I told you I'd handle everything, did I not?"He grabbed a plastic box of raspberries from the fridge and a Fiji water.
"Yeah."I felt myself relax and I sat back down on the couch.
"Good."
My phone shut off, "Ugh I hate this phone!"I shook it.
"What's wrong?"
"This phone is like 3 years old and it's so unbelievably slow."
"I'll get you a new one."He popped a raspberry into his mouth.
"Wha- Just like that? No planning, no questions asked, you'll just buy me one?"I was confused, as I leaned my head back on the couch, looking at his shirtless, slender, yet well muscled frame.
"Yeah."He said simply, taking in another raspberry.
I sighed. I wonder how much he was willing do do for me. Wait, no why am I thinking like that. I shook the thought out of my mind.
"What?"He stared at me intently.
"Nothing..."I played with my hands.
"Ryan."
"What!?"I raised my voice.
"Don't be a spastic. What's on your mind?"
"Who's Amanda Panda and Addy?"
His face wrinkled into annoyance, then a smile, before laughing.
"Jealous?"
"That was sure a lot of emotions you just went through... Care to explain?"
"Those are my exes."
"That's tacky."
"What is, letting my exes have my Netflix?"
"Not just that, but having the audacity to share it with two of them."
"They're twins. They share everything."
"Wait wait wait. You're telling me you were in a relationship with twins?"
"Yeah."He said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
I didn't know whether to say way to go or be disgusted. So I went with both.
"That's great and all, but what the hell."
"Like you have room to judge Ōjo. With that body and face of your I'm sure you'd had your fair share."He downed another raspberry.
I stayed silent, looking away from him.
"Wait... Are you a virgin?"
"No."I sighed, "Far from it."I was a little hurt.
"Ryan. What's wrong?"
"I don't wanna talk about it."I looked back over and next thing I knew he was right in front of me.
"Did someone hurt you?"His expression was serious.
"I said I don't wanna talk about it."I looked away from him.
He grabbed my face, squishing my cheeks. "Did someone hurt you." His were wild and his face was hardening.
"Yeah, you are, right now. Let go."I put my hand on his wrist trying to pry him off of me.
"Tell me."His eyes now furious were filled with rage.
"Yes."I felt my heart begin to sink as the memories came knocking.
He released me, sitting down next to me.
"Who?"He pried, staring intently at me. "Ryan tell me who hurt you?"
"This man named Jerry."As the memories came closer and closer the door they were sealed behind I felt my eyes begin to fill with tears.
No I can't. I can't cry like this. Not...Not in front of him.
"Last name."He demanded.
"Sanchez."I looked away as a tear rolled down my cheek.
"Tell me what happened. I know it's hard, but-"
"Let me guess? It'll be okay right? Is that what you were gonna say?"I bit my lip as the bitterness and sadness set in.
"No. It's not okay. I was going to say that just because you were all by yourself then and suffered in silence doesn't mean you still have to be. You aren't alone anymore. You have me."His face was stone, but his eyes were passionate.
"I've never felt good enough for anyone because of what was stolen from me. I've never felt pure."
"Ryan you are pure. Purity is what comes from the heart and the mind and the soul. And you've got it."
I could no longer hold back the tears as they streamed down my cheek, The tears fell at his words and at the painful memories. No one had ever told me that it wasn't okay, always "It'll be alright", "You're strong", "Stop clinging to the past", "Forgive and forget." Why should I have to be strong all the time? How could I forget something like that? It will never be alright.
This was the first time in a long time that I felt vunerable. I tried wiping the tears away but they were relentless. I began sobbing loudly the memories flooded my mind. The moment my heart began to pour Lex pulled me into his chest, wrapping his long, warm arms around me. We sat in silence as he held me while I cried. Lex held me until I was done and then some, by that time three and a half hours had past.
"You must think I'm weak."I sniffled, my head leaning on his warm, smooth chest.
"You are beyond strong Ryan, stronger than any person should ever have to be."He said quietly, stroking my curls.
"I've had to protect myself for a long time..."I didn't know where to start, "I've been alone for so long... I shouldn't have let my guard down."I was afraid to let someone in, I couldn't handle being abandoned again. "I can't afford to."I felt the numbness begin to isolate each part of me one by one.
"I swear that you'll never be alone again..."His words were absolute. "I promise I'll protect you."
Without even realizing it he had fought off my numbness. I picked my head up. His hazel eyes were gentle as he gazed into my soul and I into his. I could feel the static between us, our bodies calling out to each other, yearning to learn the way the other tasted. Lex answered the call by leaning in closer to my face. I froze as my body tensed. I couldn't move, I was afraid. I didn't want to be taken advantage of, I was so vunerable, I didn't know what it was I wanted. He stopped for a moment, then changed direction and gingerly kissed my forehead. My body instantly relaxed under his warm, soft lips. I let out a small sigh of relief.
"I won't ever force you if I can help it."He whispered. He rested his chin on my head.
"Mm..."I inhaled his scent as I snuggled into him.
"I'll sit here as long as you need."He pulled me closer, pulling his legs up on the couch creating a small barrier between me and the outside world. It felt safe. I'd never felt so safe in my life. I closed my eyes.