I heaved a sigh as I watch our professor discuss our lesson.
What is he saying?
It would've been better to watch the clock do its thing than listening to this and that. It's tiring to sit in a chair while you just wait to go home. The time passes by, yes. But what I saw inside that girl's eyes yesterday made me think of the things like... what kind of technology is she using? Is she from the future or something? Does she know what she just did to me?
It made me up all night, and worst, I was still floating all morning. Can you imagine being an idiot while being lighthearted? My brain is freaking empty.
The bell rang and our professor already went out of the room. My classmates stood up too and I can clearly see them being problematic as it was written all over their faces.
We're all too young to be this miserable, aren't we? Might as well, continue on being miserable.
Wow. I'm so inspiring.
I immediately ran to the cafeteria, where my friends and I will be going to meet after classes.
Should I tell them about the thing that happened yesterday?
No, they might think I'm crazy.
Colorful lights, crowded room, loud music, and beer. I live for this.
The four of us were sitting around a circular table, laughing, and being loud.
But then there's me, still thinking about the girl that bumped into me. I tried not to think about it, but somehow, it still finds its way to get back into my mind. It was literally out of my control. I don't know how a nonsense thing could make me feel like this.
"You've been stupid before, Paul," Carlos notices.
I shrugged. "Do you believe in magic?" I asked out of nowhere. What the heck am I doing?
They all laughed at me. "Why, do you have any magic to show us?" Cedric laughed with his blushed face.
"No, never mind," I mumbled. I grabbed another bottle of beer and drink from it.
Maybe a little drowning in alcohol could make it better?
One, two, three... seven? I lose the count. How many bottles have we drunk?
It felt like everything around me is moving. My head is aching, but for a moment, at least, I forgot about everything. It let me be happy for a little while. At least.
I put both my arms on the table and there lowered my head. Everything's spinning and it felt like my soul is about to escape from my body.
"Ced, Paul is drunk, you have to deliver him to them," I heard James told Cedric.
"Ha? Why me? My house is far from them! Just call his da--"
"No, I'll deliver Paul, rather than teach you two there," I heard Carlos cut off Cedric's line.
"Yes, the daddy of the year award goes to Carlos!" James yelled.
I can still hear them cheering and laughing for a few more minutes and I remained in that position.
I was stunned by the absence. How many years have I been fooling myself? How many years have I wasted my time? Well, I was rich and everything and I knew to myself I was happy. I can have whatever I wanted to have. I can do whatever I wanted to do. I knew to myself that I was meant to be like this. But what if ... just what if ...
"Bro, wake up, Carlos is going to take you home, you're so drunk," I looked up at the man who spoke next to me while patting my left shoulder. James.
"No, I can do it myself, I don't need Carlos' help," I insisted.
I stood up as I try to stand steadily, but everything keeps on spinning. I felt someone hold both of my arms and I take a look at both of my sides. It's Cedric and Carlos.
"All right, we'll take care of you, you can't do it anymore," I heard Cedric on my left.
"I don't even need your help! Stop being silly!, eh!" I withdrew my arms and tried to look into their eyes properly. "How many times do I have to say, huh? Just stop! Stop acting like you really care, when actually, you're not! You, especially you!" I try to point my index finger to Carlos, "Pfft, you're so gay!"What the heck, Paul?!" I heard James behind Cedric.
"You know--"
"PAUL!" I heard an unfamiliar voice shouted.
The music is still loud and the room is dark that there are only colorful lights everywhere. I can barely hear and see everything clearly, but one thing's for sure, I want to get out of here.
"PAUL KIAN GONZALES!" I heard the unfamiliar voice shouted once more.
Papansin.
"WHAT?!" I shouted as I turn my gaze where the voice is coming from. I tried to keep my figure.
They come closer to us. They are a group of boys with massive arms and big physiques and the one who has been calling me is taller than me. I don't know them. Is it because I'm drunk or because I really don't know them?
I can still see James, Cedric, and Carlos standing behind me on my peripheral view.
"I heard about what you did to Irene, to my sister," he said, emphasizing the word "sister."
So you're his brother. "What's your name again?" I asked.
" You're really arrogant, you just got drunk, you forgot my name," I heard him laugh.
"Because you're not worth remembering. And what happened to Irene? Yes, she deserves it. She's not worth it, like you," I tried to look at him in the eye for a second and turn my back on him.
James and Cedric hold my arms again. These men did not leave yet, huh.
" That's really you Paul, isn't it? Turning his back on the person he was talking to. It's so rude, maybe your father is embarrassing you, "I heard the man a while ago talk again.
That's it, I've reached the limit.
I stopped walking and turned my gaze on them once more.
"Bro, please, don't shoot anymore, those are big people, "Carlos whispered to me.
"I'm not gay," I gritted my teeth. "Fucking bastards."
"Paul! Listen to us too! Maybe this mess will get worse at school, don't shoot anymore," James told me as he tightened his hands on my arms..
"As if I care," I mumbled.
I clenched my fists and I was ready to face this man. I know I'm a shame to everyone, but how dare he say that to me?
The next thing I knew is that I'm lying on the cold ground, in a dark corner, being beaten up by three men, still inside the bar. Where the hell are the security guards? Did someone call somebody for... for help?
My three acquaintances left me. Who said I'm going to call them "friends"?
"Sobrang yabang mo!"
Punch. Kick.
Everything is still spinning and all I know is I'm hurt. They're not stopping. My nose is bleeding as well as my lips. For real, I think I'm going to pass out at any moment.
I tightly closed my eyes, trying to get out of their grip on my sleeves.
But... what did I saw again? Am I going to die?
Until they stopped punching. My sight is still blurry but I can still see them, taking few steps backward, with their eyes wide. What's wrong with them?
I looked everywhere and noticed that everyone is looking at me.
What kind of embarrassing thing did I just do again?
Those men who have beaten me up were about to turn around and run away. People inside the bar are still looking at us as if watching a film.
For some unknown reason, I can still stand properly, and I can see them crystal clear.
I followed the man who called me through the crowd. " Who's arrogant now?!" I shouted. I touched his back and surprisingly, he was thrown away from where he is standing to a glass window.
That's when I noticed that my hands are shining.
I am shining.
I see them all covering their eyes as if dazzled.
My head is aching. Everything is not under my control. I keep on glowing, and I don't know what to do.
If I'm going to die tonight, will someone cry?
Everyone inside the room went out. The darkroom before was now bright.
I swear I don't believe in magic. What nonsense is this? I don't want to die being confused.
Something exploded and it set the place on fire.
Something? Or someone?
I'm still sane, and I know what's happening. I'm just not sure. How many bottles have I drunk?
Someone set the bar on fire. I was the one who set every part of this place on fire.
I saw everything with my own two eyes.
My sight gets blurry and the darkness creeps to me.
•••
I opened my eyes and I see the blue skies.
I can hear the waves of water, its soothing sound, and the smell of the breeze of the ocean.
Can someone tell me I'm still alive?
I got up with my feet down on white sand. Everything is perfect. Everything is quiet. All you can hear is the water and the wind.
But...
Where am I?