Chereads / Harbinger's Determination / Chapter 15 - My healer

Chapter 15 - My healer

The day was coming to an end. A shade of orange spreads throughout the sky with darkness not too far behind.

Dimas sits on the porch of the farmhouse. His right arm lies at his side. Numb and unresponsive. He tries flexing his fingers but nothing happens, not even a small twitch.

After he had used his ability for the third time, an overwhelming pain exploded in his arm. It didn't begin to go away until they had made it back to the farmhouse. When the pain had subsided, he attempted to move his arm but to no avail. Even after Lilee had healed the small cuts and dressed the wounds on his arm.

He reaches for his fourth glass of lemonade. Savoring the tangy and sweet combination. Dimas takes one of the ice cubes and chews it. He leans his head back, resting it against the window sill behind him, eyes closed.

[I can't fight with one arm. I mean, I can but that'll just put me at a bigger disadvantage. And I don't need any more of those.]

Dimas takes a deep breath.

[Don't let this be permanent. Let it heal.]

He pleads to no one in particular.

"It'll be fine."

Dimas chokes on the bits of ice he was chewing. He wasn't expecting Lilee to be right next to him. After a few small coughs, he's able to compose himself.

Lilee is standing at the doorway to Dimas's right. Her hair was still wet. Instead of her usual attire, she was wearing a light-blue dress with a yellow floral pattern which Nicole had let her borrow.

Lilee sits down right next to Dimas. Not acknowledging his coughing fit. Probably for his sake. "You're worried about your arm, right?"

Dimas scoots to his left, leaving a small gap between them, and leans against the bench's armrest.

[It wouldn't have happened if you didn't pester me to take the job.]

Dimas wanted to blame Lilee. Let her suffer a little. However, he couldn't. After all, he had also agreed. And Dimas wasn't one to blame others when it was his own choice.

"I'm not worried." Dimas lies.

"That's good cause like I said, it'll be fine." Lilee takes a hold of Dimas's right hand. She places her fingers on his wrist. A slow and steady heartbeat can be felt. Dimas doesn't notice any of this. "Think of your arm as being asleep. All it needs is some rest and it'll be good as new."

"Mmm..." Dimas responds unenthused. Lilee words doing nothing to ease his worries.

The duo sit there, neither saying a word. Both stuck in their own head with worry.

"I'm sorry." Lilee says. The sudden, and unexpected apology, snaps Dimas out of his thoughts. "It's my fault. You got hurt. Your arm isn't working. We almost died… All because I wanted a shower…" Lilee lets out the guilt that's been eating at her since they got out of the cave.

Dimas continues to look away. Even when he hears Lilee's begin to sob softly. The same feelings he had when she told the story of her scar began to stir within him.

~ You're going to let her cry? ~

The small voice asks from within Dimas's head. The same voice that spoke to him in his dream and when fighting against Stone. Before the dream, he had never heard this voice and yet it's familiar.

[It's not my fault she's crying.]

~ That doesn't mean you can ignore her. ~

[It also doesn't mean that I should comfort her.]

Dimas begins to argue with the voice.

~ She apologized. ~

[So?]

~ So, forgive her. ~

[I'm not mad at her.]

~ Then why are you treating her this way? ~

[Because… I don't know if I can trust her.]

~ She saved our life a couple times already. ~

[…]

An old memory rears its ugly head. Dimas pushes it away.

~ Lilee isn't Mar- ~

[Ok! Just… shut up and leave me alone.]

Dimas snaps back to reality. No more than two seconds had passed since Lilee started crying.

Despite agreeing to console Lilee, Dimas had no idea what to do. Being emotionally supportive was not something he was good at. In all honesty, he had never comforted someone before. In fact, Dimas did his best to avoid any situation where people were emotional. Whenever the orphanage had new arrivals, Dimas would stay away for a week. Preferring to sleep out in the mountains rather than under a roof with a crying kid.

[What should I say?]

Dimas thinks back on what characters in movies or shows or books would do in a situation like this.

He weighs his options.

A heartfelt speech.

[I'm not good with emotions. Or speeches.]

Cry alongside her.

[I'm not going to start crying.]

Hug her and tell her everything will be okay.

[Again, not good with emotions.]

Kiss her to make her feel better.

[No.]

This option went further than a kiss.

[Hell no.]

Dimas turns to look at her. Lilee has her head down. Her shoulders shake slightly as she does her best to stifle her crying. Tears land on Dimas's right hand which Lilee has been holding this whole time.

"Lilee..." Dimas calls her name.

Lilee looks at him. Dimas keeps his eyes forward so he doesn't see her tear-stained face. For her sake.

Dimas continues. "The spider is dead. You're alive. I'm alive. And my arm is going to be fine, right?"

"...Ye-" Lilee's voice cracks. She clears her throat. "Yeah."

"Then why are you crying?"

"It's my fault you got hurt."

"No, it isn't. If I get hurt, that's on me."

"But-"

"Lilee." Dimas cuts her off. "You're not responsible for what happens to me. I am. And you don't see me crying. You're my healer not my caretaker." Dimas glances at Lilee. The tears had stopped but she was still down in the dumps. He sighs. "Besides, you... saved me. So… you know… thanks… for that." The words awkwardly tumble out of Dimas's mouth. He glances at Lilee once more.

She's looking at him, a small smile on her face and her eyes still a little watery.

Dimas stands up abruptly, somewhat embarrassed. "But if you really want to make it up to me, ask Nicole for the lemonade recipe." He blurts out, in an attempt to move on from the conversation, while quickly walking to the front door.

"Hey, Dimas…" Lilee says as Dimas is halfway through the doorway. He stops to hear her. "Thank you."

Dimas mutters something, that Lilee doesn't quite catch, before heading inside.