Chereads / I'm dead without you / Chapter 45 - Birthday

Chapter 45 - Birthday

"Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Caoimhe. Happy birthday to you!"

Caoimhe was already awake when her family walked into her room, but like she did every birthday for as long as she remembered, she faked it and pretended to that they woke her up. She loved what she saw. The family that she loved so much stood beside her bed, and they were all smiling happily. Her wonderful dadaí held a tray with a big cupcake with frosting on it and a birthday candle. Beside dadaí stood Eamon and he had several wrapped present in his arms. Behind him were Shiro holding, even more, presents and Ikumi held a bouquet with lovely pink roses.

When the girl noticed that her dad was missing she anxiously looked around and turned to her dadaí.

"Where's dad?"

"I'm here, sweetie."

Through the door came her beloved dad with a big smile on his face, and when Caoimhe saw what he held in his arms, she squealed and put her hands over her mouth. A puppy!

She was so surprised and ecstatic that she couldn't speak. Tears formed in her eyes when Dorian got closer and he put the little dog in her lap.

"Happy birthday baby girl. I love you."

That brought Caoimhe out of her shock, and she threw her arms around her father.

"I love you so, so much dad. Thank you, thank you!"

Everybody laughed and watched as Caoimhe cuddled the teen weeks old little puppy. It was a black little Staffordshire bullterrier, and Caoimhe soon gave him the name Duke. Dorian suggested that he should be called Gigantor or Monster, but Caoimhe just looked at her dad like he was an idiot.

Caoimhe had always wanted a dog, but Finian had never agreed to it before. However, after everything that happened, he didn't object when Dorian suggested it again. So the family got a new member, and everybody dotted on the little dog.

The now twelve-year-old girl had, according to her, the best birthday ever. It was a Saturday, so no school and around noon Simon and Keith got there. Their present was almost as much of a surprise as the dog. They would take her on a trip to New York, and the girl was so happy that she cried.

Around four o'clock her grandmother and uncle Lucas came, and they had all her favourite food from her favourite Chinese restaurant. To her relief were her uncle alone. Lucas was acting a bit strange when he got questions about why Kenji wasn't there. He said something about Kenji being sick, and quickly changed the subject. Well, Caoimhe were happy, and when Lucas gave her a beautiful charm necklace, the girl embraced him and wouldn't let go for the longest time. Lucas didn't object. A hug from his adorable niece was just what he needed.

When they were eating, and everyone got to say what they wanted to drink, Lucas surprised everyone when he asked for a beer. Lucas hadn't had a drink in five years, not since he overdosed. His brother and fathers asked if he was sure it was such a good idea, but Lucas smiled and promised them that it was okay. One beer didn't hurt.

However, Lucas didn't stop with one beer, but had several and would keep on drinking if Keith hadn't told him not to, in his most 'I am still you father, and you will hear what I'm saying'- voice. But even if he were drinking, and got a bit tipsy, Lucas didn't behave any differently than he normally would. They all played some board games after dinner, and when it was time to call it a night, Keith and Simon wanted to drive Lucas home, but Lucas said he didn't want to be a bother and got a cab.

Lucas didn't go home. He called his closest friends, Armin and David and met them at a club. Lucas had known the two men for a long time, since secondary school, and they were the only friends he had that he had never done drugs with. They had been there for him during rehab and stood by his side when dealing with his heartbreak. Armin was a famous DJ, but he was having a day off, and David was a regular office worker, and they were both out clubbing like they usually did. Lucas hadn't joined them ever since he met Kenji and his two friends were surprised that Lucas wanted to meet up with them. They got even more surprised when Lucas came drunk. When they asked if everything was going well with Kenji, Lucas had just smiled and nodded. But his friends knew, they recognized that look on Lucas' face. Lucas was struggling.

There were plenty of opportunities for Lucas to get together with someone that evening. He was a handsome man, and both men and women came up to him. But Lucas did do anything. He kindly refused them, because Lucas wasn't the type of person to be unfaithful. He didn't want anyone else except Kenji. And it was that longing for his boyfriend that made Lucas finally go home.

Despite being in the middle of the night, the apartment was lit up, and Kenji came rushing into the hall. He was clearly angry.

"Where have you been all day? Why didn't you answer when I called you?"

Lucas was fully aware that Kenji had called him all evening, but he didn't want to answer. His heart was too heavy.

And Midori was pissed. He didn't understand what suddenly had happened. Since the night before, Lucas had been acting distant, and he could see that Lucas forced his smile. From nowhere he said he was going out and then he didn't come back all evening. He didn't even answer when Midori called.

Ikumi had earlier sent him a message, writing that she was sad that Kenji couldn't come and she hoped he was feeling well. After looking at Shiro's personal Instagram account, he saw that the whole McCallister family celebrated Caoimhe's birthday and Lucas was there as well, holding a glass of beer. But Lucas was supposed to be sober. He didn't drink alcohol. And after a few hours, Lucas was tagged by a friend at some club. There was even a picture of him on Facebook smiling at the camera with two other men.

The emotions that went through Midori that evening was overwhelming, and everything left him confused. He was angry that Lucas robbed him off an opportunity to spend time with Shiro, but most of all he felt hurt that Lucas ignored and kept secrets from him and that surprised Midori. He couldn't understand why he cared so much and when Lucas walked in through the door, smelling of alcohol, sweat and smoke, Midori was at first so angry that he wanted to punch the intoxicated alpha in the face. But when he saw those tear-filled deep blue eyes and that heartbroken look on the blond man's face, all anger just melted away and his heart throbbed. He got so scared that he just froze. He immediately understood and he all he could think was that Lucas knew. He knew about Shiro, and about who Midori truly was. Lucas knew he was being used. And Midori felt like the whole world suddenly came crashing down.

"What's wrong, Lucas?" He managed to ask, his voice trembled.

That look, Lucas gave him felt like a stab in his chest. It was like he was drowning in sadness when he looked into Lucas' eyes.

"Why did you do that?" Lucas slurred a little when he spoke due to the of the alcohol and him being tired.

"I don't know what you mean?"

"You called out his name. Why did you do that?"

Midori's heart was racing, and sweat began to form on his forehead. Had Lucas heard him last night? But how was that possible? Lucas wasn't even home then? Midori had known that he let his guard down yesterday, but he couldn't help himself. Shiro was so sexy in his new music video that Midori got so hard he had to come. The thought of Lucas walking in on him didn't even occur to him.

Suddenly Lucas did something that took Midori completely by surprise. He slammed his fist into the wall, and the loud noise echoed in the apartment. His eyes turned yellow for the first time, and he stared at Midori with a dark gaze. Midori was shocked as pheromones gushed from the alpha, pheromones that pierced him to the ground and made him shiver. Midori couldn't believe that Lucas was angry because this wasn't like him at all. Midori knew that he and Lucas didn't know each other that well, they had only been together for a short while after all. But Midori knew what kind of person Lucas was, and he was not violent. He was dumb but kind. That Lucas' eyes were even able to turn yellow was a shock.

Lucas was a recessive alpha. It wasn't that big difference between him and a beta. But there Lucas stood, staring at Midori with his yellow eyes and looking like no different than a dominant alpha. A violent tremor passed through his body, and he could feel himself shrinking before the alpha. It was the first time this had ever happened to Midori, being a recessive omega and all, but there was no mistaking it. He was an omega standing before an alpha, and that alpha was dominating him. Lucas didn't notice his behaviour his intoxicated state, but Midori could feel it, and it gave him so many different feelings. Most of all, was he afraid. He knew he had wronged Lucas, and he felt completely powerless.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I promise it didn't mean anything."

Midori knew his words were worthless, but he really didn't know what else to say. And Lucas continued to glare at him, his gaze never wavered.

"I think it's best if I spend the night somewhere else," Lucas said and were about to turn around when a panicked Midori overcame the fear and the suppressing pheromones and grabbed hold of Lucas' arm.

"No, please stay. I don't want you to leave."

"Why not? You called another mans name. Why the fuck should I stay here?"

"I love you, Lucas. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me."

Lucas looked down at Midoris hand on his arm, and then he gazed up Midori's face. It surprised him how upset the other man looked, his eyes were filled with tears, and he trembled.

"I hate feeling like this," Lucas whispered, and just like that, his eyes turned to his normal blue, and the pheromones faded, making it easier for Midori to breath again.

"I know, and I can't tell you how sorry I am. I didn't mean to deceive you. I didn't know how to tell you the truth."

"What do you mean?"

Lucas was pretty much sober again, and his head was aching, and he was feeling hungover, but he ignored all that and looked anxious at Midori.

"I have been Shiro's fan for years, ever since I was a teen and he was my first crush. I meant to tell you this when I first learned Shiro was your brother's mate, but I didn't know how to bring it up. I couldn't muster the courage to tell you. I don't know why I called his name. I don't want him. I want you, and I love you. Please, Lucas, believe me."

Midori sounded like he was on the verge of crying and just hearing him sound so sad made Lucas' heart hurt. He grabbed hold the omega's arms and embraced him.

"I want to believe you. But I'm anxious because my ex cheated on me for years. But I get it. You still have a crush on Shiro. Things like that are hard to overcome. But I don't want you to be with me if you don't really love me. Honestly, I'm so bloody scared right now. I don't want to be hurt. Please Kenji, don't hide things from me again."

Midori returned the embrace and buried his face against the slighter taller man's chest.

"I won't. I love you so much."

He felt Lucas lips on top of his head and closed his eyes.

"Let's go to bed. I'm exhausted," Lucas said and together hand in hand the two men walked to the bedroom.

After getting undressed and crawling under the sheet, they hugged each other close and right before Lucas fell asleep, he kissed Midori on the forehead and told him he loved him. It didn't take long before Lucas was sleeping soundly and Midori gently wriggled out of Lucas' embrace. He hastily walked to the bathroom, locked the door behind him and stood in front of the mirror, clenching the sink hard with his hands until his knuckles turned white. He stared at his reflection.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"

He had to struggle to keep himself from screaming and break something. He fought the urge to punch his fist in the mirror or bang his head against the sink. The fury inside got him shaking, and he could barely breathe. He clenched his teeth so hard it hurt.

It took a long time before the man managed to calm down, and when he did his heart hammered in his chest. He felt lightheaded and his knees week. Midori sat on the toilet seat with his head resting in the palm of his hands and he trembled.

'Fucking idiot! That was too close,' he thought to himself.

Thankfully Lucas was too softhearted for his own good.

'What the hell was all that?' Midori then thought and shivered when he recalled the sudden pheromones and those bright yellow eyes. Never once had he felt Lucas pheromones, not even when the omega went into heat. It was as if Lucas didn't have any. The pheromones scared him. He knew that an alphas pheromones could either terrify omegas or bring them pleasure, but he never thought that Lucas' would affect him in such a way. They made him feel so small, so insignificant. But he knew Lucas loved him, so why did the alphas' pheromones make him feel like that? What did it mean?

And worst of all was that heartbroken look on Lucas' face and the panic Midori felt when Lucas said he would leave. That scared him more than anything. Why? Why did he care so much?

When Midori got back to bed he couldn't fall asleep and he spent hours gazing at Lucas sleeping face. He had never felt so awful before and he didn't even know why he felt like that. And when he finally managed to sleep, his dream was so horrible that he woke up crying. But he didn't remember anything at all from the dream and as Lucas embraced him, Midori didn't hate his touch. And Midori couldn't understand why.