"You…"
"…"
The morning after the party, I visited the Ayanami estate where the girl who attempted to kill me was under house arrest.
"If you're here to demand me to apologize or ask for compensation, get lost. Filthy male swine!"
"…"
Even knowing that I am a daimyo, her sharp tongue never ceased to insult me as I silently took them in.
"What? Why are staying silent? Do you like being insulted?! Well then, I'll-"
"Enough, Ayanami-ojou."
"Ojou-!"
When I addressed her with that honorific, it seems like she remembered something that made her look at me in shock.
"…Let's start from the very beginning… shall we?"
I learned everything about her and her sister from the many stories that Chiyo told me during our usual nighttime trysts.
About how the Ayanami clan almost lost their power.
About how the two Ayanami female generals became such a terror in the battlefield.
And how these two… had an actual reason to hate the opposite gender.
"Lady Mitsuha… As Kusanagi-dono requested…"
"I know… you may take her out for the day. But know well that I will order my warriors to watch after you two. If you will, in any kind of way, harm her. I will appeal to Kyoko-sama to let me cut your head off."
"Mm. Rest assured that she will face no harm."
While she was still flabbergasted with the situation she was in, I asked the young female general named Ayanami Mitsuhide to follow me out of their home.
"Let's talk while walking to the town, shall we?"
"Y-you… what are you-"
"I just wanted to talk while walking. I believe it's just a simple request."
"Grr! Fine!"
Begrudgingly, she walked behind me as we walked out of the walled mansion and into the road leading to the town of Fumetsu.
"I was really surprised of what you did yesterday. It's my first time to be almost cut down since your elder sister tortured me at their camp at Iso river."
"Hah! You should've learned from before and never come here in the-"
"You'd rather let Lord Kenji die then? I'll keep that in mind."
"W-wait! You-!"
"Calm down, calm down. I'm just joking."
As we continued walking, I thought it was the right time now to start the thing that I am planning.
"Say, Mitsuhide-dono. What is your reason to fight for Kusanagi-dono?"
"Keh-! That's an easy question. I fight for Lady Kyoko because I believe in her ambition and ideals. I want to preserve the peace and safety of Kiko and protect those who are dear to me."
"I see. He is quite admirable, then."
"Huh?"
"Your eldest brother. If he was the one that I asked, he'd probably say the same things."
"Y-you…!"
The Ayanami clan of today didn't used to be a matriarchal, misandrist and xenophobic family. Rather, the journey to that state of affairs is a long, long process that started as a simple stroll and ended in almost wiping out their entire family.
"I heard everything from a former squire of your sister. She and I are now betrothed after she resigned from her position and came under my service. But rest assured that she hasn't told any sensitive information. I'm not that much of an opportunist to force someone to do that."
"You… are you talking about Aoyama Chiyo?"
"Yep. That's the name. The girl who makes me soften up after an entire day of hardwork."
"Floozy… How dare her proclaim that she served under our flag."
Hearing her words, I stopped walking and turned around as I looked at her dead in the eye.
"…Ojou-san. Even though I get your frustration of hearing her break the oath of celibacy, I will not allow anyone to unfairly insult the woman I hold the dearest in my life."
"-!"
"Chiyo chose her own path in life after years upon years of being shoved around by your clan who hates her for not being a native of Shinka. The Aoyama clan had debts to pay to your clan and she didn't think twice of using her own brains and brawns as the payment, even though she knew that no one would want her to be here."
"…"
"So please, don't dare insult her in my earshot. Or else, you will not only harm yourself but also the relationship between me and your lord."
"Kh-! I get it, I get it!"
It seems like she really hasn't learned anything after all.
"Your brother… or should I say, half-brother, should've been the head of the Ayanami clan. However, in one of your strolls with your elder sister after sneaking out of your estate, a group of bandits chased after you, seeking to use you two as hostages against your family."
"…"
"Against your father's wishes, your half-brother went to where you were being kept, freed you and stayed back to fight the bandits while you make your escape… He, however, died shortly after disposing every bandit that he faced."
"Do you really have to remind me about that?"
"I have to. Or else, what I want to do wouldn't come to fruition."
I paused for a moment to see her looking slightly uncomfortable from the walk. Seeing that, I sighed and asked her to take shade under a tree beside the road before continuing my story.
"Your father was appalled by the news of losing his son. He was the one who came from his legitimate wife while you and your sister are just children from his concubine. With no other way to preserve the power and influence of his family, he decided to force the two of you into the most unfair training regime that he can create."
"Kh-!"
I saw her tighten up her fists and gnash her teeth in anger while listening to my words.
"…You and your sister trained in swords, spears, bows, muskets and unarmed combat. He didn't care if you broke your bones, injured your joints, tore your skin and flesh while training. He was set on shaping the two of you into the military prodigy that your brother was at all costs."
"…Stop."
"No."
"Grr!"
I looked at her and she seems to be just a few words away from attacking me again. But even knowing that, I didn't stop.
"To completely erase any trace of your former selves. He would force you two to act like a man, speak like a man and think like a man. He ruled with force, fear and intimidation. He didn't care about what you thought of him or what he is to you two. He just wanted an obedient weapon who can keep him in the favors of the Kusanagi clan."
"You…!"
"He even went as far as taking the matter of removing your femininity to his own hands and making you two fear being with a man by assaulting you two in your sleep until you and her decided to kill him and-"
*Ka-grash! Shh! Shh!*
She shot up from her seat and punched the tree so strongly that its branches swayed from the force.
"Stop… I said STOP!!!"
"…"
I hit it. The sore spot in her heart. For a 16-year old girl like her who lives in the Sengoku era, even I can't believe that she has already suffered this much.
"You… YOU! How dare you speak of our past!"
"Agh-!"
"You don't know anything about us!"
"Kih-!"
"Mitsuha-nee and I… We don't need your pity and care!"
"Gack-!"
"We are strong! Stronger than anyone else!"
"Urk-!"
As she needed o release the pent-up hatred in her heart, I endured the pain of her punches and kicks, not raising a guard to block it or uttering any wish for her to stop.
I had to endure it for all of this to work.
"No one… No one can understand us… The pain, the fear, the terror of being in that situation… I-"
"I understand."
"-!"
"I understand your pain."
I spoke softly as I wiped the blood off of my wounded lips.
"You… You can't come to understand the-"
"If I didn't, I wouldn't dare to say that I do."
"-!"
Wearing a shocked expression, she tried to retaliate with something, but her mouth stayed ajar without any words to speak.
"I only have foggy memories of who I am before I got to this place… I don't know what my name used to be nor what kind of person I used to be. All that I have are those thoughts and recollections that I cannot ascertain or connect to each other… but I am sure that one of those memories is one that brings me a lot of pain."
"You…"
"The thought of losing my siblings… the thought of wanting to abandon everything and run away from reality… the thought of wanting to do everything to understand a person very dear to me… and the thought of giving up my life for the sake of that dear person… Each and every one of them are memories that makes me afraid to the very core."
"…"
"But still, now that I am here, the lord of Kiko, the ally of Shinka, the fiancée of Chiyo, the tinkerer of Naka and the hope of my people… I cannot live in those horrifying memories anymore. I have to move and move and move for them… Because just like the words of an old dear friend…"
This one, is something that I quite remember from my past.
"Don't be afraid of a future failure or a mistake from the past. Rather, be afraid of being a stagnant decider and not being able to move from where you are. Because that, is the worse mistake you can make."
"!"
"Do you get it now? Everything that you are afraid of is now in the past. You and she have nothing to fear now. You and she have nothing to be angered of now. We who are living our peaceful lives shouldn't shoulder the hatred that you have against that one particular person."
"…I."
"…Follow me."
I knew that she still has doubts and pent-up thoughts. So, I asked her to follow me as I tried to hide the fact that one of her kicks to my side made walking hurt.
"This is…"
We walked to a nearby village and there, I shouted at the top of my lungs.
"Hey! You brats! Come here!"
"Ishi!!!"
"It's Ishi-nii!"
"He's back to play with us!"
The children that were playing at the nearby brook heard my shout and ran towards me as fast as they could.
"First!"
"Second!"
"Third!"
"Alright! The three winners are already here!"
"Agh! Those three beat us again!"
"Not again!"
Three children, one scrawny boy who has an untidy hair, one tall boy who has a charismatic smile and a jumpy girl who wears a dusty yukata, were the first ones to get to where I was and hold me around the waist. The other children who didn't arrive in time complained as they look at the three who beat them.
"Alright, alright… Let's do it everyone."
"Uwoh! Get in formation!"
"I've been waiting for this!"
I inhaled deeply and shouted.
"First wave!"
"Fu!"
"Bu!"
"Ki!"
We recited several words and made weird poses before laughing heartily amongst ourselves.
"Nyahahaha!!!"
"That was fun!"
"Tome-chan was late at Ki! She's the it!"
The scrawny boy declared, and this was met with the complaint of a timid little girl.
"Hey! I wasn't late! Take that back!"
"Nyenye! You're the it! Chase us if you don't want to be it!"
"Ugwah! I'll chase you then!"
As the kids began to run around in the game that I just taught them called freeze tag, I laughed lightly and motioned to Mitsuhide that we should go on.
"There's a reason why I wanted to bring you here."
"And that is?"
"You'll see."
I led her to a snack shop where I bought 4 dango dumpling skewers and 2 green teas for us.
"Let's sit here as we wait for it."
"Just what are you planning?"
We began to enjoy the newly revised dango recipe of the dumplings. I used to hear that people rarely visited this shack until the owner stated that she changed her recipe from the usual Kiko flavoring of salt to a certain white sweet granule that a merchant from a neighboring province sold him.
"T-this is-"
"Yeah. I was surprised too. I didn't expect that someone would buy Kiko sugar in bulk and sell it here in just a day."
"Sugar?"
"You can just think of it as honey that looks like salt."
"O-okay…"
Wait, aren't they already aware of sugar's existence? I think I heard of someone overcooking a pot of potato wine in the Edo period and turning it into rock sugar… Oh, the Sengoku period came before the Edo period. Why did I forgot that?
While we are eating, the two people I was waiting for finally arrived and sat on the table beside us after ordering their food.
"Hey, did you hear about the commotion yesterday?"
"About the banquet for the Daimyo who is visiting Shinka? Yes, I sure heard of it."
"I heard from the guards inside that Lady Mitsuhide started a fight and almost injured the guest daimyo."
"Uwoh! Her again?"
Hearing her name, Mitsuhide was about to stand up when I lightly poked her hand with the end of the bamboo skewer and told her to sit down.
"These morons… how dare they gossip about me."
"Take the criticism. You should learn to take the effects of your actions."
"But-"
"No buts. Until you haven't learned to be responsible for your actions, you will listen."
She sat down and closed her eyes in frustration as I made her listen to the two off-duty soldiers who are talking amongst themselves.
"Ahh… Now that I remember it. I joined in the attack of Lady Mitsuha to Kiko last time and I quite remember her snickering as soon as all of us got a disease from that river."
"Eh? What did she do then?"
"She said "Keh! You weaklings! You got a stomachache, and you can't fight already? Tch! Men… always so useless!" Like, cut us some slack, woman! The doctor who visited to treat us said that if he didn't arrive in time, we would've died there and then, and she wouldn't actually care at all."
Hearing that indirect praise, I felt a bit flustered and tried to hide it by drinking my tea.
"Still, she's our general and so is her sister. Even if they usually shout at us, they proved their selves as strong warriors who can prove their words of pride. I have nothing but respect to the two of them."
"Same. If not for their strength as warriors, I don't think we can live in relative peace and order like this in Shinka. I remember my father telling me about how chaotic this place used to be until the Ayanami and Itsuki clan served the Kusanagi clan and drove off the bandits and enemy clans.
"-!"
As we heard the two soldiers praise them, I looked at Mitsuhide and she seem to have lost her previously angered expression.
"Still, I think the two generals should wear feminine clothes sometimes. Always wearing their armors make them look too intimidating to approach. I wish they'll wear a kimono in the new year's festival."
"Agreed. For once, they should let go of the military look."
I looked at Mitsuhide again and I saw her eyes slowly forming tears. I knew that that was it.
The release that she needed to hear.
"Iwasawa… No… Iwasawa-dono."
"Yeah?"
"Did you… did you plan all of this?"
"…Yes."
She finally connected the things I've been doing and looked at me in the eyes.
"How did you… how did you know that I didn't want to stay like this?"
"Just like what I told you before. I understand your pain. I understand your frustrations. You were forced to become someone that you aren't. You were forced to become a weapon filled with wrath and pain. You were forced to become nothing but a puppet of power, a toy without a mind or right to decide for yourself…"
I also used to be like you. Maybe not in the same context and degree, but I was also pressured to become something that I never was and was hurt when I didn't obey.
By friends, by acquaintances, by seniors, by juniors and many more people that expected me to become something for their own desires and purposes. I… I felt choked and out of breath because of it. I was always trying to appease them, so I won't be left behind. But when I finally gave up, no one stayed with me anymore except for a few people who was willing to go with me through the pain.
I wanted to be free, but even freedom has overwhelmed me to the point that I don't know what I should desire anymore.
"I cannot erase your past, I cannot change what you've already went through. All that I can do to help you is to ease the pain enough for you to stand up again and fight. So, tell me Mitsuhide-dono."
I spoke and patted her head.
"Are you willing to help yourself too?"
At that point, some of the customers has been looking at us as the female samurai was bawling her eyes out while hiding her face at the top of the table.
"Umm… Sir. If you're having a lover's quarrel, please don't do it here."
"Ahaha. No,no. This isn't like that. She just remembered something sad and cried, it's natural in her age."
"Uhh… Alright, but please don't bother the other customers."
"No problem."
I returned my gaze on her and she calmed down a little and began to speak.
"I will… I want to change. I want to help myself and sister to forget our hatred."
Hearing that, I had a slight smile and I looked at the table where 4 women are looking straight at us.
"…"
I nodded to tell them that I am done, and they nodded back to show that they understood what I meant.
"Good. That's all that I wanted to hear. Another thing…"
I spoke and took out something from my bag.
"I broke your sword yesterday. So, I want you to have this."
"This is…"
"A katana made from spring steel. It's not made by a particular master smith nor is it any special, but I can vouch for its strength and reliability."
"Spring steel?"
"High-carbon steel. It's the special metal that the factories of Naka produce for weapons and other things where durability is the main concern. I presented it and some smiths wanted to get a hold of it as soon as I mentioned a price."
"I… I see."
She took the sword from my hand and took it out as she looked at the bluish metal tint in the mirror finish steel sword.
"I-it's beautiful…"
"It is. It's the pride of my castle's workers."
I replied and stood up from my seat.
"I'll be leaving now that I've done what I should be doing."
"A-ah… Y-yes…"
But before I can leave, she called me out and asked something.
"H-hey…"
"Yeah?"
"Do you… do you mind if you'll become… my first male friend?"
I thought I was hearing things, but I sure didn't expect her to stand back up from being a manhater to a neutral person this quickly.
"Sure. I'd like to finally have one less person going after my neck."
"W-what do you mean with that?!"
"Ahaha… Just joking, just joking."
I shook her hands and finally bid her a farewell as I returned to Fumetsu castle to meet with Kyoko.
"Hey, you're finally here."
"Yeah. I've done what I can for her."
"I actually thought you'll snap and ask for her head. I forgot you're not the kind who likes killing."
"Yeah, it's not like I was injured. It would be too much for me to ask for that."
"Wow, how magnanimous and understanding of you."
We both chuckled like old friends even though we've only just recently been a bit closer to each other.
"Now, now. Let's quit the jokes and talk business. Are your guys on schedule?"
"They are. I haven't received a letter yet, but with how I instructed them, they'll be here a day before we march to the border of Yukonami."
"Well then, I'll prepare food and the encampment site outside the city for them. I'll be contacting the courtesan places and-"
"Let me stop you right there…"
"Huh?"
After I heard something that I didn't like, I interrupted her.
"The 3 clans of Kiko asked me to make a law especially for this case. The soldiers of Kiko cannot engage in sexual behavior while they are deployed."
"Huh? Wait, I know that this is quite inappropriate, but you seriously can't be thinking of not giving your men some release while in combat."
"Ahaha… Well then, Lady Kyoko. Do you know the punishment for adultery and prostitution according to the revised ancient laws of the Misanagi clan that is used in Kiko?"
"R-revised? N-no, I don't think I have heard of the changes."
I took a deep breath and told her.
"For men, their genitals are cut off and allowed to bleed as they stay in a jail cell with waist deep water. For women, their crotches are inserted with a white-hot steel pipe and left on the same jail cell flooded with water. After 3 days, an inspector will look if they are still alive. If they died from bleeding and infection, they will be absolved of the crime and allowed to return to be buried by their family. If they will be disowned during the punishment, they will be buried in a nameless grave. If they are alive, they will be shot by the inspector thrice on the head and fed to the ravens."
As I narrated the punishment, Kyoko can't help but look at me in terror.
"You… your province sets that kind of a brutal punishment?"
"Of course. One of the most important institutions of Kiko's society is the family. If it is destroyed, it will give birth to a cycle that will be too hard to manage. Just imagine what kind of life you'll have as you grow up in a family where your mother or father changes every winter and summer, and your parents have secret affairs… what kind of person would you be as you grow up in that kind of home?"
I know of this as I came from a country that was destroyed by it.
Marrying for sexual pleasure and when it's no longer fun, it's time to change your playmate.
"In Kiko, marriage happens only once in our lives. In Kiko, your family will be your only one family. In Kiko, there are no loose women or frivolous men."
As I spoke the final words, a wide grin that scared even me took shape.
"In Kiko, those who cannot stop their selves from giving into the pleasure… Kkkkhhh…"
I spoke and motioned my thumb over my neck to symbolize someone being beheaded.
"Do you understand now, Lady Kyoko? Why I told you that I have changed that province?"
I asked her and she looked like she remembered something terrifying.
"I… I understand… I'll cancel the request for courtesans."
"I'm glad you understood what I meant."
I spoke and returned to speaking normally after that side of me appeared again.
"Now… I want to ask about your army. How many did you gather?"
"4000 personnel. 2000 regular riflemen split into two divisions. 500 machine-gunners in a single brigade. 1000 rifle cavalry in a single division and 500 men manning the artillery brigade."
"I would be worried with that number… but knowing the capability of your men…"
"Yep. I assure you that you don't have to worry."
"I see. I depend on you for that plan of yours."
This was meant to be a defensive war, but I raised a suggestion to her last night that can save a lot of her men and provisions.
"I'll drive off the enemies in the place you gave me, then I'll blitz my way into their lands so they'll focus on my area and light up or even halt the battles in your areas."
"Blitzkreig… you said that this means lightning war? I guess with your proposal, it would suffice to call it that. Well then, I approve of it. Shock them as I lead my own troops to their capital and seize it to begin the encirclement."
"Glad you understand."
That afternoon, the streets of Fumetsu city was abuzz with the people as men wearing battle garments and drawing large carts covered with tarp passed through.
"Are they it?"
"Yes. It's them. Let's welcome them."
I rode my horse beside Kyoko and two of her generals, Ayanami Mitsuha and Ishigawa Gojo to the area where the army gathered.
"First Rifle division! Ten-hut!"
"Banzai!"
"Second Rifle division! Ten-hut!"
"Banzai!"
"First Mechanic Firearm Brigade! Ten-hut!"
"Banzai!"
"First Shock Cavalry Division! Attention!"
"Salute!"
"First Artillery Brigade! Attention!"
"Salute!"
These are my men. The army I raised from scratch to dominate any battle that we have to face.
"At ease everyone!"
Once I shouted that order, they returned to their normal stance as they listened for my words.
"I'm glad that everyone is finally here. I didn't expect you to be this early, but I sure am happy to see your faces."
I trotted around while riding my horse and I told them one last thing before dismissing them to have their rest.
"Tell me! Why do you fight?!"
"For the Peace of Kiko!"
"Alright! Rest up and prepare yourself!"
"Roger!"
With that, I turned my horse around and faced my general.
"Nobisuke… I didn't expect you to march this early. I told you to march three days after I left, right?"
"Apologies, my lord. But things have been progressing far too earlier than we expected."
He spoke to me and handed me a letter whose seal I instantly recognized.
"…Nobisuke. Come with me and report this to Kusanagi-dono."
"As you command!"
We made our horse sprint to the hill and there, Nobisuke reported his findings and how it can be proven.
"Impossible! They cannot have already rallied this early and marched on!"
"That's what I wish it is, Lady Kusanagi. But this report came from a spy inside the Yukogahara clan's army. This cannot be just anything."
"I see… But still, it would take days to assemble all of my men and march to the border. Once we get there, they'd already be combatting the already weakened border forts before we can reinforce it."
Hearing the impossible odds we will be facing, I thought of a solution and came up with a pretty reckless idea.
"…Kyoko, let's abandon the Blitzkrieg plan for now. I'll make my men march to the border tomorrow and guard it until your forces arrive."
"You can't do that-! Their army is too large!"
"Yeah, but isn't my army designed to crush such an army?"
I spoke and she looked at the men who are hurriedly setting up their tents and fireplaces without any wasted effort.
She had a look of discomfort in her face, but she gave in eventually.
"I understand… You handle them while we are gathering our soldiers. Don't push your luck to much!"
"I understand!"
She ran off atop her horse along with her two generals which left me with Nobisuke.
"Now, inform the men and tell them to rest up properly. We'll be marching after daybreak tomorrow."
"As you command, Kou-sama."
He ran off to inform the army and now, I thought about everything that happened today.
I helped that girl to have a change of heart.
I cleared the laws surrounding my people and province.
But most of all, I took up another crazy act just to protect the future that I envision.
"For the Peace of Kiko, huh?"
When I remember it, I can't help but chuckle to myself.
"It sure will be a glorious morning."