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Chapter 5 - day after day

Outside

The cold wraps around me before being overrun by the warmth again.

Emptiness takes over my mind

or are there just too many thoughts?

Is my grey matter numb or overwhelmed?

It doesn't matter, however

I have my catharsis flowing

spiraling, splashing

against the edges of my ears and all the way inside.

On my feet again

panting and struggling in the hot air

but it's okay

Catharsis is here.

Is it really though?

Here I am again.

The stacked up bricks tower over me as I fight against worry

do I dare to enter?

What will it be this time?

I answer that as I find myself in the little creek underground

I don't fear as Catharsis is surrounding me, filling the air, invading all my senses.

Is my gray matter numb or overwhelmed?

Footsteps are heard, but they're alright.

Time passes but I forget about it.

Footsteps again. This time everything stops.

I rise from underground as the walls of my catharsis crumble around me.

I'm not safe anymore.

I find it, but it's not there.

It's stale like old sparkling water

and it's staring at me hopelessly.

The air gets thicker,

it fills with something

oh no.

From the door that remains, to my feet

It crawls under my skin, moving like it's on a highway

Behind my back it whispers

It wraps around my neck.

I can't do this again.

That smell, that atrocious disgusting smell

it stings, it burns

Inside

What has it done...?

I look desperately for Catharsis

It's there, but I can't find it

It tries it's best, but that's okay.

I get it now.

I let the smell take over me, it creepily caresses me, blowing in my hair.

My spark goes out.

It's over.

Catharsis rushes over, taking my numbness once again.

But as much as it tries, it doesn't go back as it was before.

I'm shaking.

I know what that is, very well

Why is it what it is?

What it is is what I know it is

and it knows it, very well

So I ask

Why can't Catharsis help that too?

I look around again,

I find myself in a house

But I want a home.