Okay?
It was Connor and he was grinning at me like we were good ole friends. I said it that this guy was weird. He even managed to make me feel uncomfortable with a smile. Well, if I wanted to know who the secret admirer was I had to accept his offer and I did want to know. "Yes, please". I borrowed an almost happy tone. "I was thinking just now how I was going to sit alone at a table in a room full of people".
"Noticing and helping damsels in distress is what I'm mostly good at". He boasted sounding really proud of himself.
Does that include spying on these damsels and sneaking in and out of their rooms to check if they were still in distress? I intended to find out. "Hmm, so you fancy yourself a knight in shining armour huh?" I tried to keep the conversation going while we walked to the cafeteria.
"You can say that". He showed me his whites in a smile and I mentally recoiled. Someone must've lied and told him that he looked cool when he grinned like that because he was doing that an awful lot and feeling so confident about it.
He needed to learn the truth but not from me because that truth would cut deep and if indeed he was the psycho I was looking for, he wouldn't take it well. We all know Creeps are unstable.
He wasn't the handsome type, truth be told. He was a redhead with blunt facial features and his shoulders were too broad to be attractive. If he was taller, he would have looked a bit better.
We served lunch and I started heading towards an empty table but he stopped me and shook his head.
"What? We have to sit somewhere".
"Would you mind going to the bleachers with me?"
"Just the two of us?" I couldn't help the fear in my voice.
"Why, I wish that fear I heard right now is due to the fact that you can't trust yourself around me". Something flickered in his eyes but it was gone before I could know exactly what it was. "Don't worry, you'll like it there. There's just something peaceful about eating in open space, exposed to the elements like that."
Spoken like a true weirdo. I nodded my head like I understood him. "Lead the way. I'll like to experience this peace with my knight in shining armor".
Again, he smiled toothily.
I was glad to see that we weren't the only one there. There were two guys and a girl. The girl had a cigarette in her hands and was staring into space. The two guys were quietly arguing about something.
I balanced the tray on my lap. "So...tell me, Connor, who's the lucky girl?".
"There's not one". He answered quietly.
I pretended to be surprised, "You don't mean it".
"I do". He started eating.
"Why not. I mean, you're a nice person any girl would be blind not to see that".
He shrugged, "At least you see it".
I waited for him to say more but he didn't.
"Why don't you have a girlfriend?" I pressed.
"Is that a necessity?" He raised a brow. I blinked.
"No. Not really. But everybody needs somebody ".
"Okay". He let out stiffly.
The silence between us grew awkward. I didn't know what else to say. This was not how I expected this to go but I was not about to back down.
"So...", I started gingerly, "...do you have someone in mind? Someone you send love letters to? Someone you—"
Annoyed, he dropped his spoon bang on his plate making me jump and almost spilling the contents of my tray.
"Since you won't let it rest you'll have to listen to my sad story. I have no girlfriend because every single girl I ask out reject me. I don't know the reason why". He started crying. Goodness, was this guy for real? I was embarrassed and since I caused it I figured I should do something to comfort him. I cautiously reached out and patted his back.
He set his tray aside and brought out a hanky. He used it to blow his nose and I stopped myself from crinkling my nose in disgust. "Sorry, I know I'm putting you in an awkward position. It's just that..." He started crying again.
"No it's okay. Cry it out to your heart's content". Somehow, my heart went out to him. "I won't tell anyone I promise". I added in whispers and he chuckled. I smiled at him. No one could understand how he felt better than I did. His problem was quite different from the one I had gone through but I could still relate though.
After a while, he sniffed, "Lately, I've gotten more desperate and I now ask out any girl that does so much as look my way".
"Wow, that's..."
"Pathetic. I know".
"That's not what I was going to say!" I defended.
"But that's what you thought". I couldn't deny this one.
"Were you going to ask me out too?" I asked lightly making it sound like a joke.
He looked like he was thinking about it, "Nope. I sincerely thought you needed company".
Hmm. "Did you send me a love note?" I queried and watched him closely with narrowed eyes.
He frowned, "No. I don't write love notes. I prefer to ask them out in person so if I'm getting rejected, it's done quickly and I move on to the next person".
Okay, he's not the one I'm looking for. There was no sudden change in his demeanor, no shifty eyes contact or unwarranted smiles. He seemed honest.
"Why? Did you see one in my handwriting?"
I scoffed, "Like I would know your writing if I saw it".
"True", He agreed.
We fell into a comfortable silence, lost in our own thoughts. Connor was crossed off the list leaving me with Xavier and Samson. Who was the culprit between these two? The bell signalling end of lunch period rang and I realized I didn't eat anything.
"Let's go back". Connor stood up. I did too and we left the bleachers together.
"Connor, the time will come when you'll be happy. Just be yourself and take things slowly". I advised and he snorted.
"This is me taking things slowly and waiting to be happy".
"Seriously, Connor. Take it from me who has been there. Being hard on yourself will not change anything".
"Aye, aye, I've heard you, now go". He groaned and shooed me away. "My poor ears".
I laughed watching him clean his ears. Who would have thought we would get along? "Hey, new friend?"
He looked at me and gave me that grin. Ugh. "Word of advice, from me to you, never do that again".