Quelly (read as Kelly)
I like watching sunsets. Seeing the sky change colors always feels magical. It's my favorite part of the day. I alarm my phone at exactly 6 o'clock in the evening just to see the sun disappear at the horizon.
Did you know that the sky is really transparent in color? It just appears blue in our eyes because blue has the shortest wavelength, making it visible (unlike any other color on the spectrum) to the naked eye.
The meaning behind a sunset is beautiful too. It means-
My random thoughts were interrupted by a message notification from my phone. I stood up, and felt like I'm about to pass out with the sudden movement. Guess my body doesn't want me to get up. I quickly opened the message only to be disappointed when I saw it. It's just Jay, I expected it to be a man telling me I won a million dollars at the lottery or something life changing.
"Hey Quells! Got home from school yet? Wanna hang out?"
This is Jay. A random guy, that is now a close friend, I met on tinder that lives two blocks away. I still remember the first time we matched and he had no idea I live almost next to him. The cringe.
"I found this new ice cream parlor just by the park, want to check it out? my treat : ) "
I just stared at his messages, contemplating if I should go out with him or not. I'm not really into interacting with humans today, but that's free ice cream, who doesn't want free ice cream?
"Sure, meet you there in five minutes." I replied after a couple minutes of thinking and got ready. Maybe a nice pair of shorts and a shirt would do. It's just the park I'm going to, not the grand ball on a castle.
Jay's a nice guy. Maybe a tad too nice. We've known each other for almost a year now. He likes going to new food places, trying new meals, and he always want me to come along and join him in his food escapade. I believe he has the best metabolism in the world, since he never gets fat with all those eating. And here I am, I bite a donut and I immediately gain 5 pounds.
It took me more than five minutes to get ready. I immediately made my way to the park since I know that Jay's already there.
Why do I have a gut feeling that Jay will say something that'll ruin our friendship?
°°°
When I got to the park, he was there waiting for me, smiling like an idiot. I know what you're thinking you predictable human being.
"Just wait and see their really interesting menu." Jay said as he lead me to this new ice cream place thingy.
"Wow, I am so not looking forward to that. No more shtty orders okay?"
"Okay, you get to choose what you eat this time."
I still remember the last time we went to a new restaurant and he volunteered to order for me. I got served a deep fried tarantula. A tarantula! Who the heck eats a tarantula? Who am I, Spiderman? Anyways, I almost vomited the first second I saw that awful, large, deep fried, air-breathing anthropod in front of me. I almost kicked him in the balls that day, jerk.
"We're hereeee" I can sense the excitement in Jay's voice as we entered the new place. I too, got excited when I saw my favorite ice cream flavor on their menu, Coffee Crumble!
This place definitely looks more sophisticated than a regular ice cream parlor. It is fully air-conditioned, hard wood floors, white with red accent walls, and it's full of windows and blinking lights. It feels like christmas in the summer, like Santa is at their kitchen making the ice cream. It's expectedly crowded, good thing we found a seat by the extremely large windows.
"What do you want? My treat, remember?" Jay doesn't talk much today, he looks tense. Like he needs to go to the bathroom or something.
"A big bowl of coffee crumble with a side of diabetes and a sprinkle of diarrhea" He just smiled and walked away, but he always laugh at my jokes.
I always had a thing for sweets and ice cream is one of my favorites. I can eat a whole one-liter container of it if I got the chance, but my lactose intolerance is always there to stop me. Unless I want a week of diarrhea, I have to moderate my consumption of ice cream.
Jay went back with two large bowls of my coffee crumble and his triple chocolate ice cream.
"That looks disgusting" I said as he fixed our meal.
"Like your face" Oh, I guess the NOT constipated and tensed Jay is back now.
Their coffee crumble ice cream is really good. I think this is my new favorite ice cream parlor in our small town. The taste of coffee and cream is perfectly balanced, together with the abundant amount of cookies, chocolate syrup, nuts, and marshmallows. I got to the point that I got curious and I wanted to get a spoonful of Jay's ice cream. But that'd be really inappropriate, don't you think?
As we ate, I stared at his face. His long black hair that I hate, I think he'd look better with a clean cut, his fair complexion, and my favorite, his brown eyes. He's fairly tall too, with a height of almost six feet. He's also a kind person. Which makes me think, he's the perfect boy-
"Quells, I have something to tell you." Once again, Jay interrupts my wonderful random thought. I look at his face, he looks constipated, again.
"What? are you pregnant or...?"
"This is serious, okay? Listen...." There was a long pause before he spoke again. The anticipation is killing me. The extremely delicious ice cream tasted somewhat bitter, as I waited what he has to say.
"... I'm in love with you" And there it is, my gut feeling being proud that she's right all the time. I don't think I'm enjoying this ice cream anymore.
But here's the thing ladies and gentlemen, If a person you just met told you they love you, run. Evacuate. Hide. Ignore that person immediately. They will just give you stress and anxiety. They would definitely break your heart, trust me. But this one is different, it felt like I've known Jay my whole life.
My head is telling me to say I'm in love with him too, just think about all the free ice cream Quelly. It's telling me to not hurt his feelings and hug him tight, because it's the right thing to do.
You see, Jay is good-looking, sweet, funny, and a kind human being. He is unlike other human specimens, he is less irritating. An epitome of a perfect boyfriend, but not the perfect boyfriend for me. I never saw him more than a friend, and I don't think I ever will.
"I'm sorry" I know those two words broke his heart. But do I have a choice? I don't think it's fair for him if I lied about my feelings. I can't look at his face anymore. I can't handle the sadness in his eyes.
"Quells, I'm in love with you, and I'm willing to wait until you get your feelings sorted out. Don't make a decision just yet. You have all the time in the world to think about it, I'm always here" I stared at his eyes once more. The sadness that was once there was joined by a bit of hope. His expression is blank, but his eyes, you can see everything in it.
"Okay" I said, feeling the awkwardness fill in the air between us. I don't know, these situations always make me feel awkward, and I know he felt it too.
"Okay?" He asked, with a more cheerful and less serious tone this time. I know he's trying to ease the awkwardness, thank god.
"I didn't expect you had a thing for me. I mean, you've always been a douche when we hang out" I said, trying to lighten the mood a little.
"Don't you like surprises?"
"A little, not exactly this kind of surprise, I was expecting like a free house and lot surprise or something--"
And that's it, it's like the awkward conversation never happened. We talked about random things like we usually do. Jay is back from being constipated, into his old, humorous self.
I don't want to lose Jay, but I don't think can I love him the way he wanted me to either. And that's when I realized that I should take my time and think about it, thoroughly.