Test Subject: K.SRJ_ę̷̻̭͚̐ḑ̴̗̥̌́e̶̳͊n̸͕̦̈́̊s̴͍̞̼̐̏.ent/re
Project: Fog Chip Project
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It never helped that my shadow's voice sounded like mine, or what I wished it sounded like.
Normally, I wouldn't talk to him, but the doctors never kept me conscious for long so I had to talk to him or go insane from lack of socialization. It was surprising to know that even someone as lifeless as me needed some human contact- sorry, contact with other beings.
I say "other beings" because I'm pretty sure I'm not human.
If I was, then how was I still alive? The doctors never fed me, and I'd been here for...
I don't know anymore.
I've probably been here for too long a time, or I wouldn't have developed such strange ways of passing the constantly fluctuating time.
I missed Clara for the sake of staying sane, for one.
And also because I missed her more than being able to breathe and walk and eat and other things that humanoid creatures like me, if there were others, did.
I wondered what she was thinking in every single memory I had of her, what she would do and think if she was in my situation, what she looked like, what we promised each other, what she looked like, what-
"Who's that? Is she nice to us? I don't know her."
That was the first time he spoke to me.
There's a reason I call him my shadow. He looked like a darker version of me and what I wished I myself was, but he also made me happy I wasn't him. For example, the stories he told me led me to the conclusion that he had no one on his side taking care of him, no Yao, Mei, Yanli, Jihoon, Clara. I pitied him most for not having the last one. He was also off-putting, and something about him seemed inherently wrong. Like how he could tell me about the corpses he found outside the place where he usually stayed and not flinch or change attitudes, even as he described how they were all decomposing in different ways and he could tell what day it was by observing how the corpse had died and what state of decomposition they were in.
That aside, he seemed much more alive than me, acted more like a child, despite the cynical undertones of his demeanour.
I disliked him for that, for being able to act childish, human, normal, without having to try.
I showed him who Clara was to me by agreeing to share my memories of her with him. That was something he'd always asked me for, memories. (I never knew why he wanted only those. Now I do. And I dislike him even more because of it.)
He took an instant liking to her, and would always ask me for permission to see my memories again.
Not long after that, I stopped getting woken up by the doctors and was stuck with my shadow.
It was either talk to him or go insane, so...
He didn't have a name. Not when I met him, anyways...
No one he knew loved him enough to give him one.
One day, I decided that I shouldn't call him 'Shadow' all the time.
He wanted to use my name because we were so similar, but I told him he couldn't because even if we were alike, we were still different and should have differnt names.
I also told him that names were identities, and for people like us they were powerful.
I shouldn't have given him a name.
If I left him nameless, this wouldn't have happened...
"Kuro. Can I call you Kuro?"
"Why 'Kuro'?"
"Because I keep referring to you as shadow, and Kuro is a proper name and close to that."
"..."
"̷H̸e̷h̵ ̸h̷e̸h̴.̷.̵.̶"̴
"Kuro?"
""̵̓͌Ą̵͇̹̿̈́ͅͅH̶̖͔̻̗̗̘̾̈́̓̚A̶̘͆̇̌͆̀͘H̵̤̥̬̪͉̊̒̍͑̐͂͛A̴̻̱̞̿͐͋̒͊͘H̶͉̬̳͉͒̓ͅA̴͙̘̳̾͌͆̎H̴̨̬̜̮̭͔̜̊͆̍̕͝Ȁ̶̳͍͂̒͌̿̕H̴͓̃̒̓̾̏̄́A̴̧͍̩̹̪̬͌̑́̋̈́̾Ä̴̦̓͊͝Ĥ̴̨̳̥̙̹A̵̡̮͓̙̭̣͍͆̄̈H̷̻̪̲̮̟̰̞̀Ḁ̵̪̹͉͙̻͆H̶̡̠̹̳̻̀̎̀̈́͜H̴͍̞̭̬́̒͐͗͠À̷̞̹̞̦̳̤̎̆̀͆H̷͍̩̲͎̦̖̪͑͐̈A̴͔͙̹͕̻͕͐͋͐͊!̵̧̭͎̪̐́̽̄̿!̴̱̅̍̄͊̿̀͊!̵̢̠̱̱͛̚"̷͓̼͇̩͂̍̚ "
"What's wrong? Why-"
"̴̳̽̓T̴̖͑̌h̵͕̰͊͑a̸̭͔͆͒n̸̛̺̗̈́k̴̝͆͜s̷̨̡̒ ̸̖́͋f̵̦̳́o̶̪͈̔͂r̶̪̅ ̷͈̜̒̓ť̶̤̯h̷ė̴̬͋͜ ̴͓̒̃n̴͖̞͆̂ą̶͎͝m̴͙̑ë̴̠́,̴̳̀̏K̴̢̹̜̭͔̙̰͝i̵͚̽k̸͓̐̅͆̅̕ũ̸͙̠̣͂̇̿͝.̵͕͕͋.Ń̵̦̎͜ͅo̷͍̹͋̄̿w̵̻̻̥͠ ̶̛̠̫͎̄i̶̧̳̲̇͋ṭ̶̈́̓̽'̸̻̱͈͗̌s̴̊͜ ̷̖̪̰̋̒͋m̷͓͓͕͑y̷̼̞͉͑̈́͆ ̴̤̳͖̉͝t̶̟̀ū̵͇̃͛ȓ̷̯̺͑̄n̸͇̒̒ ̶͍̳̉t̸͔͓̂̌̈o̴̜̮̜͝ ̵͍̚͠g̸̨͆ĩ̵͍͝v̵͖͇̖̔̓ĕ̶̳̬̿͜ ̶̹͗ẙ̴̲̯̪o̵̡͊̎u̵̬͊ ̶̠̆s̶̢͗͝ō̴̭m̷̪̻̅̿e̷̬͈̚t̸̮͊͛h̴̢̩̙͊͑i̸̡̘̔ṇ̷̩̮̍͊̿g̸͙̟͙̊̚͝.̸̻̉"
"I-wh-"
"̵̻͍͔̙̂A̸̰͔͆͗̀̒h̶͚̙̬̺̐̈́,̴̩̘̰̃̀ ̴͚͇͇͌͐̍̉b̷̧͈̘̲̒̂̚͝u̶͇̭̺̤̿͒̈́t̶̫̖̙͓̔̈́ ̷̼̍̊̀a̵̢̡̯̲̋̃͘f̴͚̜̯̑̍̒ṫ̷͓̺̌̓͝e̸̳̘̎͗ȓ̴͖̅̓ ̷̯̼̋t̴͖̗̣̥̒͂̀̍h̶̬͉̪͎͌̂͛̈́í̶̱̹̤s̸̜͌.̷͍̫̦̳̈́͒͂́.̸̰̞͍̘̔̔̐.̶̪̫̊͒͋"̸̝̞̗̍͋
The terrifying background noise to his voice got too loud for me to be able to hear what he was saying.
After all this time being catatonic, I finally lost consciousness.
When I gained consciousness again, I was back home, somehow.
For a bit after then, I never thought of the unsettling things that came out of Kuro's mouth. That was a bad decision.
I thought that this was a dream, or at least one of them was. I really hoped that the one about the lab was. But since when did reality give me something I actually wanted?
I was right, though. One of them was a dream.
But not the one I expected.
And it would turn out to be a nightmare, as well.