I woke up in a room filled with white walls and white ceilings with bright lights. Medyo nasilaw pa ako noong mag mulat ako ng mata. The room reeks of medicine and alcohol.
Napabaling ang tingin ko sa pinto noong narinig ko ang pag click ng doorknob. Pumasok ang isang doktor na naka suot ng puting labcoat. He smiled at me before walking towards my direction.
"You're lucky hija, minor lang ang injuries mo. May kaunti kang bali at mga sugat kaya magpahinga ka muna. You'll be staying here for the meantime." Nakangiting saad ng doktor. Isang tipid na tango lang ang binigay ko.
I felt a bit of relief. Pero kasabay noon ay ang pag dalot ng lahat ng nangyari noong nakaraan. The reason why I'm staying here. Tears suddenly pooled in my eyes. I feel so stupid!
"Celine?" napalingon ako sa isang lalaking nakasuot ng fitted polo shirt na color brown at black pants. My brows furrowed when I realized that he's familiar.
"Am I right? You're Celine right?" he smiled softly.
"I'm the waiter. From cafe el dulce." Oh, right. I don't really care though. Why is he even here taking care of a fucking unmoving woman? I'm such a mess.
"Did you bring me here? I mean, kung oo, thank you. 'Di ko alam kung sino ka but thank you pa rin. How many hours have I slept?" ngumiti ako politely. Ang comfortable ng aura niya. I'm shocked of how I can act calm at the moment.
"Ah, yes. I brought you here. I don't want to hurt you, but you were a little stupid. You shouldn't have done that," he tried to sound polite but I can't help but feel offended.
And at that moment nawala ang ngiti ko. I really am stupid for letting that happen. Siguro kaya hinayaan ko siyang pumasok sa sasakyan dahil nag eexpect ako na mag eexplain siya. What's the point? I didn't let him. Ang tanga tanga ko. It's really true that a person can't think straight once they're hurt.
Sudden thoughts of self pity entered my mind. My boyfriend cheated on me, my sister betrayed me, my mom's angry at me for God knows what reason, at ang ama namin ay matagal nang sumama sa kabit niya. I don't have my own circle of friends either. Only proves that I have no one.
I felt a lump in my throat. At kahit na nahihirapan ay ngumiti ako sa kaniya.
"Uh, can you please give me time first? G-gusto ko lang sana.. mapag isa." Sinabi ko bago pa tumulo ang luha ko. Crying in front of him will only show how weak I am and I don't want anyone to see the weak in me.
Umiling siya.
"Hindi pwede. Wala ka pang lakas at hindi ka pwede mapag isa."
"I-I just need to.." I trailed of. I can feel my heavy heart. Ang sakit. No matter how hard I try to decipher the situation, I always end up overthinking. Hindi ko na napigilan ang sarili ko. Images if my sister and Brian invaded my system. It hurts that even the most trusted person can lie to you.
Tumabi siya sa akin at umupo sa gilid ng kama sa isang upuan na maliit. Gamit ang isang kamay ay hinawakan niya ang kamay ko. His other hand wiped my tears.
"Umiyak ka hangga't gusto mo, I won't stop you. Alam mo, lahat ng tao ay may pinagdadaanan. And you're actually strong. Because even after all that happened, you're still here. You can still smile at me." sinabi niya ito habang nakangiti,
"Hindi lahat ng nakangiti hindi na nasasaktan. Hindi lahat ng nakasimangot ay 'di na sasaya. At ikaw, hindi dahil umiyak ka ay mahina ka na. Kaya ibuhos mo lang 'yan. Just think of happy thoughts. Isipin mo na kawalan niya iyon. It's his lost because you're a wonderful person. Try to love yourself more. Hanggang sa isang araw, mamalayan mo na lang na hindi mo na siya mahal."
Mas napahagulgol ako, ilang minuto rin kaming nanatili sa ganoong pwesto hanggang sa inantok ako sa boses niya. Hindi ko alam kung dahil ito sa gamot o sa ilaw ng ospital na masakit sa mata pero inaantok ako. Unti unti kong ipinikit ang aking mga mata hanggang sa hinila ako ng antok.
Madilim sa paligid at may kaunting mga ilaw lang na kulay dilaw. Nakaupo ako ngayon sa isang kahoy na bench. I can remember this place. This park is where I used to go whenever I'm upset. I tried to move but I couldn't. It was as if I was glued at my place.
I saw a girl wearing a checkered skirt and white blouse at the second bench. Hindi nalalayo sa inuupuan ko ngayon. It took me seconds before I realized that it was me on my highschool days!
The girl was crying. Hirap na hirap sa pag punas ng mga luha sa kaniyang mga mata. It was a long time ago that it feels nostalgic. May tumabi sa kaniyang isang lalaki with the same school uniform. She isn't looking at him because she's busy wiping her tears.
Natatandaan ko ang panahong ito. I was upset because of my 'mom'.
"Leave me alone! Sino ka ba?"
"Hindi ka pwede mapag isa.." the man shyly said. Hindi ko makita ang mukha ng lalaki dahil nakatalikod ito sa pwesto ko.
The man whispered something at her. I can remember this! Ang tanda ko'y bago pa man ako makalingon ay naka alis na siya.
I woke up confused and thinking. Why am I having flashbacks? Natauhan lang ako nang marinig ko ulit ang pagbukas ng pinto. The same guy from yesterday came in, with a tray this time.
Lumapit siya at may inilapag sa lamesa sa gilid ng kama pero wala akong pake roon. Tila nakalimutan kong nasa ospital pa rin ako at ngayon ko lang napansin.
"What's your name?" I asked confused. Bakit siya narito?
"Daniel Evan Dela Gorio. Why?"
"Do you have a secret agenda? Are you planning something to me? Kinukuha mo ang loob ko para mapalapit sa iyo?" I tried to look intimidating. I've been thinking of this since I woke up. Kung wala siyang balak sa akin, then why would he stay and take care of a complete stranger?
He chuckled.
"I brought your favorite food," ngumiti ito na para bang batang excited sa exchange gift. Nilapag niya sa harapan ko ang isang plato na puno ng kanin, isang mangkok ng Adobo, iced tea at caramel fudge cake.
I set aside my suspicions. I glared at him one more time before taking a bite on his food. My brows shot up. Not bad.
Tumawa si Evan. His brown eyes got small with the way he laughed. Pinaningkitan ko siya ng mata na tila ba sinesenyas na bawal siya humingi.
"Ang sarap!" nakangiti akong tumingin sa kaniya while I chew my food. He chuckled.
"You're cute."
Nailang naman ako ng kaunti kaya kumain nalang ako. Inubos ko ang dalawang baso ng iced tea. Medyo nahihirapan pa ako iangat ang braso ko dahil sa injury na natamo ko pero nakakakain naman ako ng maayos so I didn't mind.
Pagkatapos kumain ay inabutan ako ni Evan ng gamot at tubig.
Ngumuso ako at pilit na nilayo sa akin ang gamot. Gagaling ako kahit wala niyan. My fever is not even that high.
"Hmm!" I protested when he forcefully put the medicine in my mouth.
"Fine! Puwede mo naman iabot!" Sigaw ko sa kaniya.
"Drink your water!" aniya pagkatapos ilapag ang isang malaking baso na puno ng tubig sa side table. He grumpily made his way out the door. Natawa ako dahil doon.
Nagkumot ako at in-adjust ko ang kama kahit nahihirapan pa akong tumayo at igalaw ang aking braso.
Naramdaman ko na unti unti na akong nalulunod sa mga iniisip ko at hinihigop na ako ng antok nang biglang may pumasok sa isip ko.
How did he fucking know my favorite food?