Autumn woke up sweating and gasping for air. The cold breeze awakened him once again. His time flashed 00:02 as he lifts his legs to get out of bed. His head was aching as he tries to make sense of why he woke up in the middle of the night, not remembering how he got into bed. He made his way into the bathroom and switched on the lights. The brightness stung his eyes before he could ultimately see his reflection in the mirror. His brown eyes were brighter then what he remembers. Not that he can remember anything as of lately. The cold water splashes over his face, feeling like a brick against his head, causing him to moan slightly, leaning against the mirror. "What the fuck is wrong with you,", he whispers to himself. Autumn switched off the lights and went downstairs. He found his dad in the living room watching some old show he saw a hundred times before. "Why are you up?" he asked. His voice was husky and cold.
"I-I don't know why," Autumn said, opening the fridge and taking out some juice. "Why were you sleeping for so long? When I came home, I found you out cold on your bed. What have you been doing? Drinking?" His dad moved around in his chair, getting agitated of sitting for hours. Autumn put down the jar of juice. "You know I don't drink dad", the coldness of the kitchen counter on his hands calmed him down. He knew what his father was about to say, "So you were fucking some homosexual whore in my house."
Autumn tried to control his breathing, "No, dad. I was not." He could hear his father's breathing. The disappointment he's exhaling. "If your mother were here, she would have hated you for that. For what you are. I know she would." No dad, you don't know what the fuck she was like cause you were never around, Autumn felt the urge to scream. He placed the jar of juice back into the fridge and went back upstairs without saying a word. Crawled up onto his bed and cried until he was numb again.
"Autumn!" Zia barked before he returned to reality and turned back to his group of friends sitting in front of him. "You seriously need to get you some pills boo," she said as she placed all their drinks in front of each of them. "You still have problems sleeping, Autumn?" Annalee asked. Sounding concerned. Autumn forgot how she looked. Her long curly hair. Her grey eyes, which she claims she got from her mother, which she barely knows. It seems like everyone has their fair share of shitty families. "Yeah. I have had bad dreams and some amnesia besides that my father has been a total fuck head as well." he played with his straw trawling it around in his drink. "Dude, we all have spoken to you about this. Just move out and come live with one of us. You know we are all here for you", Xavier said as Annalee rest her head on his perfect jock shoulder. "Yes, Autumn. You know we got you", Zia replied, eating some of her fries. "Guys, Alton told me he has a party tonight as his place and we all invited. Which means-", Xavier leans over the counter to Autumn. "You, my dear friend, need to get laid." Zia and Annalee applauded as Xavier smirked and nodded. "Yes, Xavier is so right, Autumn. I mean you need to get laid, maybe your nightmares and white people shit will go away.", Zia exclaimed while dipping her fries in some ketchup. "Just because you black Zia doesn't make my problems white people shit", Autumn said, laughing. "I hang out with only you white asses so of cause I know when problems are white people problems. It's like a sixth sense we have", Zia laughed. "Well, never the less Zia's sixth sense. You are going to that party with us, and you are going to get you some fine ass to smash." Xavier said, exciting the girls up. "You need this Autumn. You've been through a lot. It's not like some guy is just going to walk in here that you want to bang." Annalee said, and Evan stepped into the diner. His eyes locked onto theirs. "Well, don't talk too soon, honey," Zia commented. Autumn looked away when he was staring too long. "That's him," Autumn told Zia. "Wait he's the guy you were stalking the other morning." she surprisingly said. "Yes and no. I wasn't stalking him, Zia." Zia stood up to have a better look at him before Autumn pulled her down in her seat. "Are we allowed to bring dates to the party Xavier?" Zia asked, smirking. "Yes, we can, but I don't think you should do what you about to do, Z.", Xavier commented, but Zia already jumped out of her seat and called over Evan as loud as possible. Evan made his way over to their table, and Autumn could spot the disgusted look Xavier was trying to hide. "So, we were just talking, and we would like to know how you feel about gay people." Zia enquired with her hand on her chin and Autumn trying to hide his face of embarrassment. Annalee was enjoying the encounter while Xavier looked like he could explode. "Don't have a problem with them. Matter of fact I'm gay." Evan tried to say it as smoothly as he can. "Well, Mr. Handsome, would you like to take our dear friend here to a party later tonight." Evan looked down at Autumn and couldn't help but laugh at how he's trying to hide his face. "Well, I wouldn't miss it for anything," Evan said. Zia thanked him and told him that they'll pick him up at Autumn's house. Evan glanced at Autumn one more time before he left the diner. "And that is how you get your man, a man.", Zia boasted with Annalee. Xavier looked at Autumn with so much worry and a bit of fear.
Xavier told them it was time to leave as Annalee begged him to stay a bit longer. "You always an ass," Zia said, pushing her fries aside. Autumn could see Xavier getting irritated, and he wanted to know why so he suggested that he and Xavier should leave together, and the two girls can look for outfits. "That's a good idea, Autumn," Annalee kissed Xavier goodbye and left with Zia. Laughing and giggling about what they have to wear for the party. "What's wrong", Autumn asked the moment the laughter of the two girls died out. Xavier didn't know why he felt the way he did. All Xavier knew for some reason is that he hated Evan.
"I don't have a good feeling about that guy, Autumn." he shifted his two arms together, leaning towards Autumn. "I mean, I just get an evil vibe off of him." Autumn wanted to believe him, but he knew it was more than that. His feeling was more jealousy, and that's the reason beyond his feeling over Evan. Autumn stared at Xavier for so long until he could hear the waitress next to them, asking for the people's order. "Listen, you said I should get me someone for tonight, and he just happened to walk in here." "Too fucking convenient, I might say." Xavier couldn't help himself anymore, either. He could feel the jealousy off of him. "So when you meant that I should get me, someone, tonight by the party, you meant you when you're drunk.", Autumn saw he struck a nerve as Xavier pulled back and sat back against his chair. Xavier has had the one and off drunk moments with Autumn whenever they were together and without the girls. He would always swear to Autumn that it would be the last and just do it again. Autumn stopped it all before it got far - and it almost did. "I told you I won't do that to you anymore, Autumn. I respect you, and it's a dick move of me to do It.", he said, barely even looking at Autumn. "Well, Xavier, I don't want you to do it either. Besides, I need someone who loves me and not someone who hides who he might be and needs to be drunk to convince him that what he's doing feels right." Autumn crossed his legs under the table when he felt Xavier stretched his out too far. "You're right," he said and slid his hand through his hair. "But I still care about you, Autumn, and I don't want you to get hurt. I don't want that for you." he reached for Autumn's hand, but Autumn pulled away. "I don't need you to protect me, Xavier. I can take care of myself." he stood up from his chair after leaving a tip for the waitress. "All you got to do is learn to control yourself and not lose your girlfriend."
Xavier sat in silence as he watched Autumn turns his back on him to walk away. He jumped up and grab Autumn by his elbow. "I'm more afraid of losing you," Xavier whispered. Autumn knew he was honest. Xavier meant every word. "I have to-" Autumn was at a loss of words and was locked down by what Xavier just confessed to him. -go", he said and stormed out of the diner. Xavier sat back down, regretting everything that he uttered. The last thing he wanted was Autumn hating him. He grabbed his keys, paid the bill, and waited a few moments before he left.
Zia and Annalee twirled around in their dresses, trying to find the perfect one. "Why was Xavier so upset when that guy came over?" Zia asked after taking off a blue flowered dress and stood naked in her underwear. Annalee straightens her black dress with her hands as she admired herself in the mirror. "Maybe it's because of Autumn," she uttered as Zia looked point-blank at her. "What? You didn't know?" Annalee pointed out. "No, I did not, and also, when did all this happen." Zia confusingly asked. "Well, I always knew since Autumn was always the first one he always looked for when he was drunk. Didn't matter if Xavier was at my place or his. If he was drunk, Autumn was the one he ran too. At first, I thought it was just some bromance as guys would put it-", Annalee fell on the piles of clothes on her bed next to Zia. "But Xavier took it to his kind of level when he kissed Autumn at my parent's anniversary party. I saw him." she played with her fingers as she thought back to that night. "I was there that night, but I never saw the two of them together," Zia replied. "That's because Autumn left the moment he did it. He still does not know that I know, and I tend to keep it that way", she said, standing up and walking back to the mirror. "But why, Annalee? I mean, you can leave his ass and get you someone better than him." Zia said, sitting at the edge of the bed. "I don't want better than him. He is everything I want besides the craving for men when he's drunk. Xavier is good to me, and he cares for me more than most guys' do.", she said, staring at Zia through her mirror. "You know shit is gonna get messy the moment all that build up tension for Autumn is just gonna rise," Zia explained, pulling a dress out of the bundle of clothes. "I won't worry about that." Annalee took the dress off and threw it on the floor. "It's not like he's going to remember it anyway." Zia tried to make sense of what Annalee said, but choose to ignore it. They two of them tried on every dress in the closet before they found a perfect one. Zia wanted to say something about Xavier but chose not to.
Autumn walked up to his house after he stormed away from Xavier. It was a whole 10-minute walk, but trying to understand what Xavier said made it feel like he barely even walked. He crossed the road and made it up to his house. His phones went off and saw it was a text from Xavier. "Pick up at 8." He switched off his phone and looked for the keys in his pocket before realizing Evan was standing at his door. "I've been knocking so long, and I guess my hand is broken." he joked when he saw Autumn. "What are you doing here?"
Autumn asked, confused. "Well, since we are going to a party together and we're neighbors, I guess I wanted to get to know you," Evan said as Autumn stood speechless. "Strangers don't always make the best of the company," he said. Autumn didn't know what to respond to him at all. What to say or even let him into his house. "Yeah, I know." he finally replied. "It's okay. You don't have to let me into your house." Evan brought up as Autumn kept the key locked between his fingers. "Would you like to go for a walk?" Autumn asked instead. Evan and Autumn strolled as they both tried to find the words to talk to each other. "So for how long have you been stalking me.", Evan teased him. "I have not been stalking you. It has just been kind of confusing really. You have lived there for I don't know how long but I have never really seen you before.", Autumn said as he instead focuses on the cars passing by than Evan. "I know it's bizarre, but my parents never allowed me to go out until I got to high school. That's why you haven't seen me as of much." Evan said, kicking a pebble out of his way. "Still does not make sense. We almost are done with high school, and I have never seen you at all." Autumn could see an impressed looked on Evan's face. "Are you trying to make sense of me, Autumn Brooks?" It finally struck Autumn that he does not even know what his name is. "My name is Evan.", he said as if he could hear Autumn's thoughts. "Well, it's nice to meet you, Evan finally.", Autumn said, feeling the sense of the familiar in his sentence. "You know I kind of like you the best out of all your friends." Evan looked down at Autumn, and they finally look at each other. "You barely even know my friends what makes you think you like me more?" Autumn felt him moving closer to Evan. "Well, I have my idea of them and especially with Xavier. That is his name, right." Autumn couldn't help but hear Xavier's voice to stay away from Evan. "Yeah, it is.", he answered. "You the open-minded one between them. You never let them cloud your thoughts or judgment. Never let them overpower you. You brave and accepting. That is only on the top of my head that I can think of by just seeing you-move.",
Autumn didn't realize he held his breath while Evan was talking to him. "Still speaking as you know me," Autumn said. "Would it be that bad if I did." Evan slowed down his pace and eventually stopped walking. "Why are you stopping" Autumn asked. "We need to head back otherwise we going to miss that party.", Evan said, reminding him as he forgot about the party he agreed to go too. "You're right. Let's head back." Evan waited until he walked past him before he started walking as well. "I know this may sound weird -", Autumn said after walking in complete silence. " I feel like I'm constantly losing my mind or at a loss of word for things that I don't even have a reason for." Evan moved closer to Autumn until he felt his hand close to his. "Everything will eventually make sense," Evan said as his fingers brush against Autumn's. "Fill the void, and maybe you'll remember it all." Autumn didn't care that Evan was too close. That he spoke as if he knew and understood everything inside of him. He loved the familiar feeling that Evan gave him. The understanding feeling his mother gave him and the one his father never could.