Bitter gaze, bitter praise, so much anger pooling through her soul and she can't rid of it. Hate her if you wish but she's already hated herself twice fold.
Broken heart and empty soul, she wishes she was numb to this pitiful world.
Numb to the love that she thought she had, to the soul that bounds her to the ground. Wishing that her eyes were blind to the kindness of foolery and that her heart wasn't so empathetic. Plagued with the sins of addiction, every part of her keeps coming back even though she knows it isn't good for her, she can't stop.
Forcing herself to ignore the obvious demise by putting her hands through his hair. The onyx-colored locks flow like a river, eyes like pure gold, and skin with tenderness in touch, almond in color with absolute joy in his smile.
Animal or man, she saw something that she couldn't ignore, something that made her bitter inside.
"Regina", he whispered causing her to look down, "What are you thinking about now?"
She blushed looking away, "You", she muttered in reply and he laughed, "Sorry, what was that? I couldn't really hear you." Her eyes went to the grass and she pulled some strands from the floor, "Nothing." "It wasn't nothing, though, why don't you want to tell me?"
Her fists balled and her brows arched, going back to him with something strong pulling in her heart and it only subsided when she saw his eyes yet again. Fossiled amber curiosity pooled in it and it seemed as if something else lay behind them.
Her mouth opened but words didn't come out, his hand running across her face and she fell right into his sympathy. "I was just, thinking about you I guess, and felt embarrassed to say it out loud." "Why?" "Because, then it feels real when I speak it aloud." He shrugged, "There's nothing wrong with that though."
She leaned over to his face, "It is when it becomes a problem, an attachment on my chest like a seed from a plant. If it is an obsession then it will become something to let go of."
His eyes wandered to her face, "You have an attachment to me?" "What? No, I am just saying I would prefer if I didn't have one."
He tilted his face to the side leaning closer, "Is that why you look at me with that bitter gaze?" "It's why I have to." His breath hit hers and he could almost touch her lips, his brain wandering with possible questions that he wanted to ask but instead, he just stared. Into the deep ocean that lie deep within her eyes, wanting to know what was in them and why they look so sad. He almost hated that look yet at the same time he was drawn to it like a moth to a flame.
If she thinks he's torture, then she hasn't seen true burdened faith. What cruel punishment she gives him with those saddened eyes... That pain that is heavier than a basket of bricks and the light that is fading like a burned-out candle. How there is truly nothing he can do but watch as she places herself in a situation of downfall and deceit. Her kindness being wasted and her beauty something that will become a timeless thought, all of what they have now will dissolve into an unappreciated novel.
That's what broke his heart the most and why distance was the key to her savior yet he couldn't bear to let her go. To let her sweet honey curls be in the hands of someone else, someone who wouldn't treat them right, who wouldn't cherish them as he would. Who wouldn't embrace their soft nature and let them know that they are the best thing that life has to offer, why would he let someone treat them anything less than that?
She backed away from his face a bit with a smile, "Now, what are you thinking about since you asked me." "You", unlike her he wasn't afraid to say it in fact that very confidence made her nervous and pull away. "No hesitation in that huh?" "No, why would I hesitate?" He reached out and touched her shoulder and she didn't flinch, even when he trailed his finger up to her face and ran circles through her hair. "I like your hair long."
She couldn't hide her heated face, "Oh is that so?" "Yeah", he said with a smile and she bit her lip trying to hide her pearly whites. "I like your long hair too", "Oh, yeah?" She giggled, "Yeah, it's one of my favorite things about you. I think it's one of the prettiest things I've ever seen, I'm not sure if it's because of your wild nature or just because you have a good gene pool." He nodded to her comment, "Probably a mix of both but I think I did get some pretty good genes if I don't say so myself."
He lay down on her shoulder and moved the hair out of his face, resting his eyes with a deep breath in. "Even if you looked at me with the meanest glare in the world, I'd still think it's beautiful and even if you aged 100 years you would still be the same to me, and even if we were apart for years.." He squeezed her hand in his, "I would still love you as if I'd seen you every day for those past years, always." He kissed her hand with sweet tenderness and it made a shine fill in those eyes of hers. A heart that felt embraced, and cherished, "I-I love you too", she stated with tears in her eyes.
"I love you more than the stars in the sky and I'm glad you give me this feeling that makes me feel appreciated like I'm not alone. Like all of the things in the past were worth it because I got to be in this moment, to live it and..." She wiped the tears from her eyes, giving him a hug so tight that it could strangle the regular person. But to him, it felt like one of the most natural things in the world and if he could he would stay in this moment forever.