"We had a fire drill at school today."
Alaina didn't look up as she walked beside her older brother, their hands tightly intertwined.
"I was scared because I thought it was real. Then Josh called me a baby so I punched him in the face just like you told me to."
Rory couldn't help the proud smirk that pulled on his lips as he watched her carefully step over each crack and crevice in the concrete below them. Josh wasn't a new character, Alaina had been complaining about the bully for weeks. Rory planned on going up to the elementary school and threatening the principal with murder until his younger sister practically begged him not to. So instead he gave her advice, which was to punch him as hard as she could and give him a reason to be scared of her. Then he wouldn't bully her anymore. At least, that's how it worked for him when he was her age.
"Good, he needs to learn not to pick fights with you."
"Yeah, but then I got in trouble and he didn't!"
"That doesn't seem fair."
"That's what I said!"
Rory kept his pace slow for her, he wasn't in a hurry to get to the apartment anyways. Work had been long, his full-time job of unloading and reloading trucks all day tiring him out enough that he dreaded coming home to his roommate.
"Is Kyle coming over tonight?"
A sweet, giddy voice asked as Alaina looked up to him with a wide smile. Her two front teeth were missing and he couldn't help but smile back.
"Of course she is. Tonight's sushi night with the guys."
"Bleh."
Alaina stuck out her tongue in disgust. Every Thursday night the group got together at the his apartment. Ezra and Kyle would bring the booze, Jude would bring the sushi, and Dax would set up the apartment. After dinner they would all have a small study sesh for their college classes while Rory put his younger sister to bed and then the real fun would begin.
Rory wished he could've afforded to go to college. He sighed as the jealous thought crossed his mind.
"Can I have spaghetti Os for dinner?"
As soon as the thought entered his mind it was gone with the sound of Alaina's voice. If he was in school he wouldn't have the time or money to take care of her, she'd still be living alone with their mom and dad. Suddenly missing out on the experience seemed less important.
"You had that last night. If you keep eating spaghetti and candy you'll get fat."
"Good! I want to be fat!"
He chuckled as she lifted her shirt and rubbed her tummy.
"I'll make a deal with you. If you eat one piece of sushi you can have whatever you want for dinner."
She stuck out her bottom lip with a pout.
"But sushi's nasty!"
"How would you know that? You've never tried it. Kyle eats it."
"Kyle's a grown up. Grown ups like nasty foods."
"Well I think your food is nasty."
"Nu-uh. You always steal my gogurts."
"That's fair."
The apartment complex came up on their left as they continued to talk and laugh. Rory pulled out his phone to check the time, the guys usually made their way over after their classes at 6.
His brows knitted and he paused in his steps as he looked over his screen.
His background was a picture of him and Jude climbing a statue in the middle of town. Not five seconds after Dax took this photo the cops got onto them.
But that wasn't what made him stop.
The time and date that usually sat in bold letters at the top of the screen were missing. He opened his phone, searching through it for the clock or the calendar app with no avail.
"Huh."
While it confused him, Rory didn't pay it much mind and instead continued into the complex with his sister in tow.
Rory finally let go of Alaina's hand as they made it to their third story apartment, not bothering to fish for his keys before he opened the door. Dax never locked it when he was home. As soon as the door was open they were greeted by Dax moving the couches side by side so it was easier to see the tv. A bag of takis and a half drank two leter of code red Mountain Dew sat on the coffee table covered in crumbs.
Without any hesitation Alaina jumped onto the couch he was moving causing the large man to groan.
"Dax, can I play your game?"
He sighed, standing up straight and wiping the small beads of sweat that had formed on his forehead.
"Are you going to cry when I make you get off?"
She was silent for a moment before she shook her head aggressively.
"You know how to set it up."
Alaina squealed excitedly before jumping over to the tv and grabbing a controller to turn on the PlayStation.
Rory ignored the two, instead moving to the kitchen to start on the dishes. Dax followed him, resting two large hands on either of Rory's shoulders and shaking him aggressively.
"Jude's coming over tonight."
He spoke in a mocking tone and Rory pushed him away with a scowl. Taki powder now stained his sleeves.
"He comes over every week. Stop acting like it means more than it does."
"How do you know it doesn't? Hmmmm?"
Rory rolled his eyes, turning back to the dirty dishes.
"Oh, come on dude, man up and make a move! Who cares if you're gay?"
"I never said I was."
Dax huffed, jumping onto the counter next to him.
"You never said you were straight either."
Rory didn't say anything, continuing to wash the dishes and occasionally looking up to check on Alaina in the living room.
"Well, if you don't want to talk about your shitty love life I'll talk about mine. Kyle said Ezra's been acting like a dick recently, should I take my chance?"
"I'm pretty sure Kyle and Ezra going through a rough patch isn't a go ahead to ruin your friendship."
"You suck. Can't you just support your best friend and roommate?"
"First of all, you're not my best friend."
He finished off the last dish, setting it to the side before turning to Dax with a raised eyebrow.
"Second, you're an asshole. Kyle's not into guys with egos the size of your fat head."
"Rude." Dax's smirk only grew, "and if I'm not your best friend than who is? Jude?"
"Yes."
The bigger man scoffed playfully, rolling his eyes at the quick answer.
"Best friends don't look at each other like that."
Before Rory could defend himself from the statement the sound of the front door opening caught their attention.
"Anyone home?"
Kyle's cheerful voice filled the small apartment.
"Kyle!"
Alaina threw down the controller in her hand and ran towards the door. Kyle's long, curly hair was pulled into a tall messy bun, short ringlets framing her face. Ezra, who stood next to her with a content expression held a large paper bag in his arms, most likely filled to the brim with liquor and beer.
"My man!"
Rory smiled, taking the bag from his hand and lining the bottles up on the counter.
"Good to see you too."
He spoke sarcastically, a smirk on his lips as he closed the door behind them.
"I punched Josh in the face today!"
Alaina smiled proudly as she looked up to Kyle with doey brown eyes.
"Oh, really?"
She glared up at Rory, who was too preoccupied to notice. She told Rory over and over again not to tell the young girl violence was the answer, but of course, as she could've guessed, her words had fallen on deaf ears.
"Did you rent the movie?"
Kyle asked Dax, who's smile only widened.
"What? Did you expect the poor one to get it?"
Rory ignored the jab, instead opening the bottle of Vodka Ezra was eyeing.
"Shots anyone?"
Rory asked in a cheerful tone and Ezra and Dax were suddenly right by his side.
"I'll drink with you guys once I finish my homework."
"Buzz kill!"
Dax yelled playfully and Kyle stuck her tongue out at him.
"You guys are terrible influences on me!"
Alaina yelled at them after a moment of looking up at Kyle with admiration.
"Yeah!"
Kyle added with a giggle,
"What she said!"
"Well, I need one. School kicked my ass today."
Dax groaned as Rory poured a couple of shots, handing them out among the other two.
"It's not the school's fault your stupid."
Ezra laughed and Dax lifted a hand, his middle finger up and facing the dark haired man.
"Alright, enough fighting."
The red head spoke in a sing song voice as she sat on the counter and watched the men lift their drinks together before downing them.
Dax sighed after his shot, looking between each of the others.
"Not enough."
He held out his hand, bending his fingers as if they would magically pull the liquor closer.
"Rory, pass me the vodka."
A strong sense of dejuvu ran over him at Dax's words, turning his blood ice cold.
"Rory, pass me the Vodka."
Without question Rory handed Dax the bottle. He tipped it back, gulping down a good bit before pulling away with a sour expression and wiping his mouth.
"Okay."
He let out a deep breath, holding the liquor tight in his opposite hand.
"I'm ready."
Rory gently put the shirt back between his teeth and Dax nodded at Ezra to continue.
The knife came down with as much force as Ezra could conjure, a hissing sound came from his flesh as he cut the small limb off. A muffled scream filled the room as Dax began to struggle.
Rory's eyes widened as the intrusive thought forced it's way into his head. He took a step back, his brows knitted and mouth ajar as he stared at Dax's hand. What was that?
"Are you okay, bubby?"
Alaina's hand was suddenly tugging on his pants, causing him to jump. It took him a moment to be brought back to reality.
It isn't real.
A voice in the back of his head told him.
This is real. What's happening now. Going to work, raising your sister, having fun with your friends. This is real life.
"Yeah."
Rory spoke breathlessly, pushing the unusual daydream that played in his head away with as much energy as he could conjure. He reached a hand down, patting Alaina's messy blonde hair with a forced smile.
"I'm fine. Go play some more of your game while the grown ups hang out."
Rory grabbed the vodka, passing it to Dax. The large man didn't even pour a shot this time, just tipping the bottle back and coughing when he drank too much. Ezra laughed at him and Dax punched him in the shoulder.
"Awe! But I wanna hang out with you guys."
"We can hang out when Jude gets here."
Kyle spoke up, smiling Alaina's way. The young girl pouted, stomping dramatically as she made her way to the living room.
"Speaking of which, where is the little bastard?"
Dax eyed Rory as he asked the question.
"Oh, I forgot to tell you. Jude texted me and told me he was going to be late. Something about one of his teachers asking something from him."
Kyle left the kitchen, grabbing the bag of takis from the coffee table, her nose wrinkling as she looked over the crumbs.
"Why didn't he text me?..."
Rory mumbled under his breath, reaching for a beer, opening it, and taking a large gulp.
"Awe, is our lonely friend jealous?"
Ezra draped an arm over Rory's shoulder, taking the beer from his hand and stealing a sip. Rory quickly snatched it back,
"Get your own, asshat."
"Leave him alone Ezra, he doesn't like being teased."
Kyle added before throwing a powder covered taki in her mouth. Dax moved to stand next to her, shoving his hand into the bag and grabbing a handful of the spicy chips.
"He better not take too long, he's the one bringing the food."
"Of course all you'd be worried about is the food, fatass."
Rory commented.
"I guess we can go ahead and get homework over with. Maybe Jude will be here by the time we finish."
The three boys groaned at Kyle's statement.
***
"Did you get the back ones?"
Alaina did as she was told, scrubbing her back teeth with her Spider-Man toothbrush aggressively. Her nose wrinkled as she stared at herself in the mirror, her mouth open comedically wide, leaning so close bits of toothpaste flew onto it. Rory made a mental note to clean that up after he'd put her to bed.
"Why didn't Jude come?"
Alaina asked through a mouthful of toothpaste. Rory sighed, his arms crossed as he watched her from the doorframe.
"I don't know."
"But he always comes to sushi night."
Rory looked away from her reflection and down to his bare feet, his brows knitted. Kyle said it was because of school, but that had been hours ago. They'd already finished their homework and started drinking without so much as a text from Jude to tell them where he was.
Alaina spit the paste from her mouth, washing it out with a cup full of water and stepping down from her short stool. The small girl stopped in front of her brother, unexpectedly wrapping her arms around his waist in a tight hug.
"It's okay, bubby. Jude wouldn't ever be mad at you."
"What? Why would you think he's mad at me?"
"Well, when mom and dad don't talk to me for a long time I think they're mad at me."
Rory had to hold in the loud sigh caught in his throat. Of course an eight year old wouldn't understand, he should've explained it to her already but things had been so good he kind of forgot about their parents. He forgot that even if he was the one raising her, they were still Alaina's mom and dad. He leaned down on one knee, resting a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Alaina, mom and dad aren't mad at you."
"Then why don't they talk to us?"
"Because..."
He bit his lip, trying his hardest to put his words in a censored, easy to understand way.
"Mom and dad aren't fit to raise a smart kid like you. That's why you live with me, because I don't want you to end up like them. I want you to be able to raise a smart kid of your own one day in the very, very, very distant future."
He put emphasis on the very.
"If they don't talk to you, then that's their loss. They're missing out. You make my life better than I could've ever dreamed. So, even if you think they're mad at you, or if you ever get sad because you can't see them, remember that you've alway got me. No matter what."
"So they don't talk to us because they're unfit to raise me? What does that mean?"
"Unfit means not able to. They couldn't feed you, or clothe you, or walk you to school, or tell you stories."
"Oh..."
Her expression fell for only a second before she smiled sadly.
"Well, that's okay. I have you and you tell the best stories."
"Thanks Alaina."
"You're welcome!"
"Hey! There's the little shit! Nice of you to finally show up!"
Dax's loud slurred words echoed from the living room through the small apartment. Rory seemed to perk up at that and the action didn't go unnoticed by his younger sister.
"You don't have to tell me a story tonight, I can read one by myself!"
Alaina was already making her way past him and back to her room. It was rare Rory didn't read her a bedtime story, only when she was in trouble or he was too tired from work.
"Are you sure?"
He started after her and she turned to him with a hand on each hip.
"I'm a big kid! I can read by myself!"
She ran into the last room on the left, slamming the door behind her with a giggle. Although confused, Rory wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
"Yeah, sorry I got caught up. But I brought sushi?"
Jude tried with a small smile, pointing to the to-go plate filled to the brim with raw fish in his drunken friends' direction.
"Too late," Ezra chuckled, "Dax ordered sushi and noodles an hour ago."
"Yeah, you missed Alaina trying her first piece of sushi."
Kyle giggled, her hair a thick mess of curls pulled into a tower of a bun at the top of her head and her cheeks flushed.
Jude smiled at the thought, "oh yeah? And how did that go?"
"She spit it out immediately, right into Rory's hand. It was hilarious."
Dax laughed obnoxiously, jumping off the couch and making his way over to Jude's offering.
"It was gross."
Rory suddenly spoke up from the doorframe of the short hallway, glancing over Jude's disheveled appearance.
He couldn't help the warmth that made it's way into his chest as Jude's baby blues fell on him, that smile of his widening.
"Hey," Jude spoke in a breathless tone, his eyes not wavering from the man in nothing but a pair of sweatpants and a tank top.
"Hey."
Rory smiled back, unaware of the other three drunkards in the room watching them awkwardly.
"Whatever."
Of course it was Dax who decided to ruin the moment with a scoff.
"I've always got room for more."
He yanked the large tray of sushi from Jude's hands and opened it up before shoving a piece into his mouth. Ezra punched him in the arm when he sat back down, earning a confused glare. The dark haired man only motioned towards the two blondes as if you say, 'way to ruin their moment'.
"What? He offered it!"
Ezra rolled his eyes at that.
Rory ignored their usual pestering and teasing.
"Alaina thought you were mad at me."
Rory chuckled lightheartedly.
"Oh no, that's not it at all!"
Jude quickly defended himself with a tired voice causing Rory to chuckle.
"Relax. I told her that wasn't it."
He made his way towards the small living room table, sitting down next to the others and pouring a drink with the items they'd already pulled out. Jude followed his lead and sat down beside him, gratefully taking the cup Rory poured for him.
"We figured you couldn't turn down a request from a professor, nerd."
Ezra spoke up before taking another sip of his drink. Kyle's head laid on his shoulder as she watched the others, her head swimming with the alcohol she'd been downing throughout the night.
"I mean, you're not completely wrong."
Jude agreed with a shrug.
"My professor said he'd bump up my grade on his latest assignment if I showed a new student around campus.
Apparently the guy's fiancé is a nurse who talked him into going back to college after he dropped out the first time."
Dax stared at Jude with a risen brow,
"And he told you all this the first time he met you? What did he look like?"
Jude thought for a moment, swirling his drink in his hand lazily.
"Slightly older, tall, tan, he had really long black hair, he was kind of musclular-"
"Ooooh, he sounds cute."
Kyle butt in with a laugh, her cheeks red. Ezra hoped it was from the alcohol and not some crush on the unknown man. When he gave his girlfriend a small glare she only laughed harder, pushing his face away playfully.
"What was his name?"
Rory asked, ignoring the couple on the couch.
"Uh.. Cassius? Or maybe Cash, I think?"
Without so much as a warning Rory was suddenly thrown into another violent daydream.
"If you don't learn how to be quiet..."
She stepped towards Rory, taking his cheeks between her fingers and smushing them together to open his mouth.
"We're going to have to teach you how."
Her voice was gentle and smooth, as if she was talking to a baby rather than a prisoner.
"Stop!"
Cash pleaded in a respectful tone.
"He'll be quiet. I won't let him talk-"
The dark haired man was interrupted as she yanked the knife from his hand causing him to groan in agony.
"Everything okay?"
Jude asked in a gentle tone, resting a hand on his shoulder. Rory jumped slightly at the sudden touch, but quickly recovered. He nodded, shooting a weak smile Jude's way. He blamed the weird scenes playing out in his head on the alcohol in his veins, too content with the current situation to look farther into them.
"He's probably just nervous about his new competition."
Dax snorted, earning a glare from the redhead next to him.
"Competition?"
Jude's brows knitted at the word, confusion on the tip of his tongue.
"Shut up, Dax!" Kyle shoved him hard enough that he fell to the side.
"I'm fine, must be the alcohol..."
Rory chuckled lightheartedly, picking up his mixed drink and chugging back a good bit. He was definitely feeling the liquor but obviously not as much as the three next to him. Dax was barely holding himself up, making jokes with slurred words left and right, while Kyle and Ezra leaned on each other just to stay upright. This wasn't unusual for the group, Kyle and Dax were both lightweights while Ezra was always two drinks ahead of the others. Jude, as usual, was barely drinking anything. The small blonde was only half a cup down and his eyes were already drooping, his body swaying back and forth as he sat cross legged next to Rory. He couldn't help but think the action was rather cute.
He took another large gulp of his drink to wash down that unwanted thought.
"I'm sorry I was late. I didn't know you guys were waiting for me."
Jude spoke quietly, guilt written in his expression.
"Of course we were." Rory smiled,
"Besides, how am I suppose to deal with these losers without my best friend here?"
Jude's cheeks turned red at the confession and he quickly turned away so Rory wouldn't see. When Jude made no effort to reply Rory continued.
"I was actually kind of worried you wouldn't show up..."
Jude suddenly turned back so fast Rory thought he might've give himself whiplash.
"What do you mean?"
Their faces were inches from each other as Jude exclaimed his question in a surprised tone, as if he was almost offended Rory would think such a thing of him.
"Coming over here is the highlight of my week. I'd never miss a chance to hang out with you, Rory."
It was Rory's turn to blush, turning away as he rubbed the back of his neck.
"Rory..."
A small voice filled the room, Alaina stood in the hallway, a stuffed animal tight in her grip as she rubbed at her wet eyes.
"I had a bad dream. Will you come tell me a story?"
"Rory..." a soft young voice broke the tension in the room and the group of survivors turned to see a small girl with tired eyes standing in the hallway. The medical wrap they had used to cover the bite on her neck was now drenched in blood.
"Alaina..." Rory whispered his sister's name in surprise, hiding his face from her view as he quickly wiped his tears.
"I can't sleep, my neck hurts. Will you come tell me a story?" Her small voice was the only sound in the whole room. Rory put on a fake smile before turning to look at her from his spot on the floor.
"Yeah, of course."
Rory's stomach turned at this new daydream. It was different than the others so far. It felt much more real. As if maybe... maybe this was something he'd already lived through.
Rory glanced at Jude, unsure if he should leave him alone with the other three almost completely passed out.
"It's okay, I'll make sure the others don't throw up on your furniture."
Rory couldn't help but smile,
"Thanks.."
He stood up, swaying back and forth for a moment before finding his balance and walking towards his sister. She quickly grabbed his hand in a bone crushing grip. His brows knitted as he led her down the hallway.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Alaina wiped at her teary eyes, sniffling as she spoke.
"I had a dream there were monsters coming after me. You were there and Jude and Kyle and Dax and Ezra and some other people I didn't know. It was scary because you tried to help me but you couldn't."
They turned into Alaina's bedroom and he stopped her, getting down on a knee to be at her height. He rested a gentle hand on her shoulder, wiping at her cheeks as she waited for her older brother to comfort her.
"You don't have to worry about that. I told you, I'll always be here to protect you. From any kind of monster that comes. Okay?"
She nodded, her blonde hair falling over her face.
"Okay.."
He stood back up and she made her way back into bed, Rory tucked the sheets around her before laying down beside her with a tired sigh. He hadn't realized just how tired he was until he rested his head on her pillow.
Rory looked his baby sister over with the softest smile he could conjure.
A calloused hand gently combed through her blond hair, only a couple shades lighter than his own and just as unkempt.
When he pulled his hand away he paused at the wet feeling on the tips of his fingers. His heart sank.
The same feeling Rory had been having all night wrapped it's hands tight around his neck. He looked down at his shaking hands with wide eyes, holding his breath as they fell on a dark shade of red.
"Bubby?"
Alaina's worried voice and the grip of her small hand shaking him brought him back to the present.
The present, where there was no blood on his hands.
The present, where Alaina was right next to him. Her delicate features framed by waves of sandy blonde hair as she looked up at him with doey eyes.
"Sorry, I just-"
He cleared his throat, taking a deep breath as he checked his hand once more.
"You looked scared...."
"No, no, no, I'm sorry Alaina. I'm just having a hard time focusing right now."
"That's okay."
She scrunched her nose for a moment, looking away as if deep in thought. And then,
"I'll tell you a story instead."
Rory smiled at that before wrapping an arm around his sister and pulling her closer.
"That's a great idea."
Her smile widened before she scooted into a more comfortable position, leaning against her brother as she thought up a bedtime story.
"Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess from Colorado."
Rory's brows knitted.
Why did that sound so familiar?
"Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess from Colorado-"
"That's where we're from!" She stated happily.
"She was super brave and fought all types of monsters to keep her kingdom safe!"
"Yeah, well, this princess was the bravest little girl in the world! She fought off dragons and monsters with ease." He took a deep shaky breath.
This didn't feel right. Had this happened before? Why couldn't he remember it? His mind ran a million miles a minute as alaina continued her story.
"But her brother didn't like to fight, he liked to run. He didn't think the rules of the castle were fair and he didn't think fighting was the only answer."
"But her older brother was frustrated, he thought the castle rules were stupid. He wanted to get away from all of the people in the kingdom."
He paused, trying to stop himself from crying.
Rory felt sick to his stomach as hallucinations of a life he didn't want, a life he didn't belong to, played in his head with each word she spoke.
"So he ran away, like he always did when things got hard. Except this time, his sister, the princess came with because she didn't want him to be alone."
"and one day her brother talked her into leaving the kingdom. He talked about running away forever, never turning back. Of course the princess knew he didn't really mean it. He never did."
He wanted her to stop. He wanted silence. Everything kept dredging up things locked away in a part of his mind he didn't want to know about.
"They left the kingdom and walked for a long time when a gigantic dragon-"
"Anyways, they left the safety of the kingdom. They walked for days when suddenly they came face to face with the biggest dragon either of them had ever faced-"
Rory stood to his feet without any kind of warning, rattling his sister in her bed. He couldn't listen to this. He was going to be sick. He needed something, anything to make the hallucinations stop.
"I'm sorry alaina, I'm not feeling well."
"Oh.." she said softly, not meeting his eyes. Guilt filled his chest but he didn't have the guts to know how this story ended. How the unwanted memories of a different life ended. Not with the dread it brought up.
"I love you, goodnight."
Without another word he fled from the room and down the hall, turning a sharp right into the bathroom and slamming the light switch with his fist.
Rory opened each drawer and cabinet frantically before his eyes finally fell on their target. A small orange bottle, the label ripped off, sat in the midst of random bathroom supplies. He grabbed it, willing the terrible thoughts away with a handful of the large circular pills down his throat. He took a deep breath once they were down, his hands gripping the bathroom counter tightly. What was happening to him? What were these scenes playing out in his head? Why did they seem so real?
"Rory?"
He quickly straightened his posture as the quiet voice interrupted his thoughts. Jude watched him from the doorway with knitted brows. He'd been caught red handed. His eyes were wide as he stared into baby blues, waiting for some kind of hammer to come down. For Jude to be angry, to yell at him, to hit him, to lecture him.
"... can we go for a walk?"
Jude asked in a quiet tone, his eyes wandering back and forth between Rory and the pill bottle in his hand.
"Just around the complex and back."
Shock finally faded from Rory's expression and he nodded. This had to be Jude's way of punishment, he would take Rory on a walk so no one could hear and then tell him what a horrible person he was. Jude would tell him he's not good enough to raise Alaina. That he was a lazy, stupid drug addict with no ambitions.
"Yeah, sure..."
The pity behind Jude's small smile didn't go unnoticed.
"Cool."