*R-18 SEXUAL CONTENT, MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES*
After a quick shower, I gently crawl into bed. Johns soft snoring and stillness tells me how tired he is. I reach out to touch his face softly. I love the feel of the rough stubble of his chin, his smooth, velvety lips as I drag a finger over them. I catch a stray lock of hair from his forehead and put it back in place. I'm greeted by the sight of those chocolate brown eyes, looking intensely at me.
Caught, I mumble, avoiding his gaze, "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you." I go to pull away, but a firm grip on my hand keeps me close to his face. I glance back up and he kisses my palm, a soft, warm, silky kiss. Tremors run from my palm down my entire length, making me pulse gently. His warm breath against my skin, makes a shiver quiver through my body.
The look in Johns eyes becomes heated, passion filling them as he registers my shiver.
"John, I.." He cuts me off, using his lips to quiet me and kisses me deeply. I'm shocked, but he's stroking the inside of my mouth with his tongue, pulling my thoughts from me.
I lose myself in his kiss, his arms wrapping around me, bringing me closer as he rolls on top of me. I moan when his hands slide down to roam my body. His firm touch that lingers over my hips, holding them, as he presses his body to mine. His rock-hard erection grinds against my groin, promising pleasure mixed with apologies.
We let our bodies talk to each other, pulling moans of apologies and 'how dare you' gasps.
Even though no words were spoken, we knew what each other were silently saying.
'I'm sorry.'
'You're an idiot.'
'You make me an idiot.'
'You were one to begin with.'
'I'm lost with out you.'
'I need you too.'
Our climax said I love you, as we gazed into each others eyes. We did not break our contact, and as we finally stop only to gasp breathless as we hold each other tightly.
Next thing I know the sun is up and coming through our window, I stretch out taking up the whole bed.
'Wait... Where is he?!'
My heart starts racing, countless scenarios run through my head.
'Did he go to the bathroom? Did he go into the office? Did he leave me?'
I sit up and I'm throwing the blankets off as John steps in to the room with a cup of coffee.
"Hey." He hands me a cup and I take it, calming down my racing heart.
"Hey." I reply and set the coffee to the side and head to the bathroom. After freshening up, I'm sitting in the bed drinking coffee next to him. Other than the 'hey' we've not said a word to each other.
After our cups are finished, I can't stand the silence any longer.
Sighing, "So about the last two days..."
He's quick to cut me off.
"I'm sorry about all of it, I know I overreacted and getting wasted at work only made it bigger than what it should have been. I really don't remember much once I started drinking. There's a flash here and there but that's it. I'm also sorry for barging into Rosie's office the way I did. The guy who called Suites made it seem like you were on a war path to her office. I should have known better, I do know better than that. I just... I don't know, yesterday I was not a hundred percent and I know all of this is no excuse.... However, I did inform everyone at HQ, that it was all a misunderstanding, blown out of proportion by rumors. Even Rosie confirmed you two were discussing getting together for drinks sometime soon."
"Okay, I wanted to apologize too, John. I didn't mean to to imply that you were not really you. The thought crossed my mind for that second, but I didn't mean it." I watch his reactions while I fidget with my fingers.
His arched brows and blank face tell me he is waiting for something else.
'Is he waiting for an explanation about Rosie?'
"John, I didn't believe that you would cheat on me. I looked at the video from the bar and saw you were not responsive to Rosie hanging on you. I saw how people not knowing us better would think that something was going on. I talked to Suites..."
"I already know that. Why did you snap him to you without giving him a heads up by the way?" John irritably shakes his head at me.
Pressing my lips tightly together and cocking an eyebrow at him I inform him, "I did not intentionally do that to him. It just happened."
"Okay..?" He continues to look expectantly at me.
I'm at a loss as I glance at him sideways and look up, searching my thoughts for anything I may have forgotten.
"Is there anything else that you'd like us to go over?" My eyebrows were about to hit my hairline with how lost I was on why he keeps looking at me this way.
John aggressively runs his hands through his hair, rolling his eyes in the process.
"What about him?" Venom coats his sentence and once again here we are on the subject of his jealousy.
"John do you really think I would cheat on you with Bavarthos? Nothing is going on! I told you to come with me to talk to him!"
My voice bounces off the walls of the room as I throw my hands up in the air.
"Will you stop holding Alex over my damn head already?! I was drugged for crying out loud!" I stand up not believing that he's still holding that against me. I cross my arms and take a breath to calm down. "I thought we had already been through this, John?"
"I'm not holding Alex over your head! I'm simply wondering why you two are so friendly? Especially, when not that long ago, you could barely stand to be around him!" John tugs his shirts hem that he's balled up in his fist.
I grip my head in frustration, pulling on my hair as I run my hands through it, I unleash some of the things that have been building up in the back of my mind that I've tried to not think about.
"We're allies John!"
Tossing my hands up in the air, I rampage on.
"He has more knowledge on magical capabilities and ways to defend us from the Erlking. Because if you haven't noticed yet, it's not looking very good right now. Every day, the Erlking gains more ground. We are ending up doing more rescue missions then we are battling to keep him back and fight back! Our magical users are getting worn down and the blue bottles are not working the same anymore, it's like they've been watered down. What's the really scary part is the Erlking has only been throwing his cannon fodder at us. HE hasn't even STARTED to show his magical troops to us yet!"
My voice cracks from the stress breaking through to the surface.
"John do you not see the bigger problem we have going on right now?!" Warm drops start to fall from my eyes.
'UGH I hate crying like a incompetent bitch!'
With shaky hands, I wipe my cheeks, dragging them roughly across.
"I do see, Mary. I'm not stupid! I see it just as much as you do." The scowl on John's face and the tone of his condescending voice as he yells back at me, makes me experience deja vu.
'STUPID, INCOMPETENT, NOBODY OF A NURSE LIKE YOU...'
The echos of my commanding officers voice rings in my head and I check out.
Mentally, I check out. I know this, because the next thing I know, I'm trying to figure out where the hell I am. My eyes are out of focus, my hearing is hindered by loud ringing, and I feel numb all over.
I hear a loud consistent roar and feel cold as my body begins to shiver like a rattlers tail. My eyes have trouble focusing on whatever is in front of me. I place my hand down beside me to stand up and realize it's wet and slick where I am. My eyes are starting to take in my surroundings, rushing water in front of me like a curtain. Wet, slimy, granite stone is under and around me, moss is growing in the spots farther away from the deluge.
"Where the fuck am I?" I look around and see no way off this ledge with out going through the falls.
'And who knows what the hell is on the other side. I'm not taking any chances with that.'
I snap myself back to the house and John is there, but so is Lars and Alex.
I'm shivering in my tank top and underwear, teeth chattering like jackhammers as I rub my arms. I can't even talk right now, I'm so cold.
They stare at me for a split second before jumping up.
"What in the hell?!" John scoops me up in his arms and carries me to the bed room. A few seconds later, Alex hands John some towels and leaves.
John begins to roughly wipe me down, trying to dry me off.
"You're going to skin her alive, rubbing her so roughly!" Lars smacks the towels in Johns hands away from me and snaps me into the bat tub. "BATHROOM!" Lars turns and shouts before turning the squeaky faucet handle, letting water start to fill the tub.
"How lon-n-g-g-g ?" I question Lars through the clacking of my jittering teeth.
"Two Hours, Mija. Estúpido triggered a flashback. He said you were talking to your commanding officer and .."
"You were running around like you were a medic, in the war again. You started screaming about being on fire when you snapped away. I called them over not knowing what to do. You couldn't snap before when these happened." John sits down on the toilet, rubbing his tired, bloodshot eyes.
"I got it from here, Lars. You and Alex can go home."
" Estás loco si crees que me voy de aquí, hombre. (You are crazy if you think I'm leaving here, man.) I know you two have been fighting, and this wouldn't have happened unless she was under duress! I'll be in the living room." Lars runs a hand over my hair and gives John a heated stare before shutting the door as he walked out.
"I'll go with you, Sin. To see what you, Lars and Bavarthos are working on. I don't want us to be falling apart with the rest of the world. I'm tired of feeling this way and being the bad guy in everyone's eyes. " He stares at the ceiling through the back of his eyelids as he leans back against the wall. Letting out a breathy sigh, he leans over and turns off the water to the tub.
"Feeling better?" He asks me as my teeth are no longer clicking against each other.
I nod with a tight-lipped smile, 'I'm starting to now that you are finally willing to listen.'
Of course I keep this part to myself.